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BZ-02824
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money nice to see everybody i haven't seen people long time a and blake and carol jerry
my friend ross who just introduced a and and alipay in dozen more than at reagan all these are old friends and hannah are sorry teacher blue mountain or so it's very nice to be with all of you are this
cold saturday morning
and so i wasn't planning to give this talk today i gotta or request a couple of days ago hosts and was unable to be here are with you today so i was asked to give the talk so here we are

so on i've been lecturing on
here blue mountain on them not always so
so i've chosen a
one of the faster calls to share with you today
and then
as usual i prefer my glasses needing them more often these days as he likened doing without the glasses
so this farcical as cause supported from within so i thought it would be a nice ah
classical to speak about
given the the recent loss of our
dear teacher surgeon
and that we were all in various stages of
of grief or not
ah
and i'm so i thought this might be appropriate given situation now
and how we feel are supported from within by surgeon and buddha
ah you know with surgeon
yeah many students
and so he had a lot of people he had to help and teach and work closely with
so ah in ordering are so many years of
practicing and busy see
and practicing with him
in and out
and of course it was always the
the pleasure of most of the time to sit there and the in and sit with him and he was always around but in fact you know ah i guess for most i speak for myself as is different for everybody or widows we didn't see him a whole lot
although during different phases of the practice i would know knew there was a time when i would run into him all the time you know indifferent and a out and about in town
surrender i didn't see my voice he was always show up somewhere
ah
and as i always felt a support it from within
and i still feel that now i feel support it from within because of our own practice that suzuki roshi has given us
oh
but also because our
you know this sense of same thing happened to me when my parent after my parents died
oh
the presence change i mean they're no longer present but the president right
and so we visited in various ways
i don't mean to spit speculate metaphysically about and just the phenomenon
and so a surgeon this are still with us
and
and then after death it seems that the equality of the relationship changes
and
just like i feel very supported
by my parents from within
since their death
i feel i haven't seen feeling about surgeon
and of course we're doing the practice that he gave us that he taught us
oh saw the practice itself is the support
and you know as we all know when checking mooney died before he died they asked him what was your final teaching
ah and he said be a light unto yourselves
ah
and you know we kindle are like from the teachers light
so from teachers like the kindle our own light
and then we have our own
inner light of the teachers like is turned inward and then we have our own lite ah that is our own light and is also the teachers light and is buddha's life
and that light is always with us
as a move or in the world
oh
and and zones in itself or she can us our wages are we cause us in our school
ah
just sitting
or silent illumination which is the central focus of so to stand on chardon tom is it's called in china
oh
that's the main focus of our practice
and we could say thousand and she can theresa
ah
is the act of how we become a light onto ourselves fanatics or that is an act of understanding
we sit through understanding
we sit with our bodies
but we sit with understanding
understanding through and through sitting with our body through and through
and when we take me decide to take up the practice that's a moment of understanding
so a body is an act of understanding
in many different ways
so are now coming to suzuki roshi text
we are firmly protected from inside that is our spirit
we are protected from inside always incessantly
so we don't expect any help from outside
so no help from up outside
although the teachers outside of july artists the sidebar
although teachers outside is not really outside
the help of a teacher it seems to be coming from the outside is actually coming from the inside
you know service after resigning as sutra we offer a prayer to delegate a merit
always dedicating the marriage of a practice not keeping up for ourselves
according to dog in senshi we're not seeking for help from outside because we are firmly protected from inside this is our spirit zen spirit
we're protected from inside always incessantly so we do not expect any help from outside
actually it is so but when we recite the sutra we say a prayer in the usual way what he means by playing the usual way i think we all understand this is that we understand we come with the background and monotheism where prayer is a a prayer to a daily
the the
somehow is outside of ah so although that's also could be understand in different ways
in one of our dedications of merit say made two wheels the two wheels or dharma
the two wheels are the dharma wheel spiritual will
and the material will
may the two wheels of the temple go smoothly and made the calamities which the country and the temple may face calamities like war epidemic famine fire water and wind be averted
certainly there are many calamities right now in the world so the urgency of our practice is even more
even more evermore
although we say this actually the spirit is different we do not serve observe away or recite are sutra to ask for help that is not a spirit when we recite the sutra we create the feeling of non-duality
create the feeling of calmness and strong conviction in our practice
so we have strong conviction
ah
there are strong faith strong conviction
although this is not without doubt of course we understand about doubt sometimes we are strong conviction and fate that people say over how you so sure oh how how come you're so sure your convictions
nobody told us to believe dogmatically
night but the conviction comes out of the practice in the face
oh

if that kind of feeling is always with us we will be supported it will become involved and dualistic selfish practice to support our building or organization
or to support our personal life
there is not much feeling in our sitting on our or are chanting
so we can if if the practice is focused i'm trying to get something for ourselves or or teacher teaching or or organization or then the spirit is not so strong
with strong when we have strong our confidence in our way and do not expect anything we can recite the sutras with a deep called feeling that is an actual practice
dogan century says also says that we don't do not have any idea of dirty a pure or any idea of calamity or disaster
so we have idea of calamity a disaster right now but he says that ah we don't have any idea of chemical disaster but even so we have the practice of pleading the restaurant
even though your face or mouth the body is clean when you get up you should wash your face and clean your mouth would you think cleaning the rest from his dirty work that is the wrong idea the restaurant is not dirty even though you don't clean it it is clean more than clean so we clean it as a practice not because it is dirty
if you if you do it because it is dirty that is not our way
the buddha is one of the first shocking statements i heard this tomorrow say was buddha is a shit on a stick
i thought it was so irreverent ah but that's the the spirit is it the shit it eat the shit in the bathroom scuse me for speaking this way
is not dirty
oh even though we have to clean it and flush it because otherwise we get sick
but it's not really dirty
and the bathroom we don't think because it's dirty either we don't clean our house because this dirty though sometimes we develop ideas a pure and impure what clean or dirty and in preterm us but it need not perturb us but we clean anyway that's the spirit
our believe is that if the donnelly was turning than the material we'll we'll be turning to while nice and interesting because now into an interesting
a point
if we not supported by anyone it means so dharma wheel is not actually going
this is doug in centuries understanding and i have tested whether it is true or not he says
especially during the war when i did not have much to eat
most priests were to earn some money to support themselves and their families
my belief was that if i observe the buddha's way faithfully people would support me
if no one supported me it would mean that tokens words were not true
so i never asked anyone to give me anything
i just observe the buddhist way without working as a teacher were as a clerk in the town office
now this an interesting ah
juncture
ah
what does he mean y c see why does he seem critical of a priest working as a teacher
how do we understand that given our practice and btc is kind of experimental it's been an experiment in the making
for many years
we all are the experiment
so why would he mind of a priests working as a teacher
or as a as a postal worker or as a clerk wouldn't be that spreading the dharma
i think that he says this ah because he was concerned that the priest who were wearing suits are shiny shoes as he's gonna say in a minute ah were sort of to involved in material wheel so that in disregard of their practice
and they were really aren't they weren't really sitting on a regular basis so that being pulled by the mundane pulls you away from the practice
i think that's why that's in any case that's what i think about that
so that he said i raised some vegetables and sweet potatoes in my temple garden
that is why know how to raise vegetables pretty well
i had a special garden in front of the temple so i dug up the ground to up took out all the stones and put in manure
some villagers came and helped me and we grew vegetables and we had a group a good crop
oh
so we know also that this is how a sojourn practice
oh he followed his teacher
and
a p creator a vegetable garden also at pcc long time ago
and he didn't work
outside being a priest to her outside busy see
ah
and didn't have money
oh so that's one model but he never really actually
ah if you have a different experience please share
but he never actually encourage us to practice that way
oh
he encourages to have the practice the experiment and mississippi where we lay people want to sit like the monks
was in japan lay people support the priest but don't necessarily keep the
the czars and schedule
and and i think to serious concern was that even the prisoner were not keeping them
latin schedule
so our experiment was to to be lay people but to practice like monks
and it's not so easy if you live in the world that have families and responsibilities and whatnot so that that's been part of the experiment
oh
then he says one day my neighbor came to help me cook
when she opened the rice box there was no rise at all
i had a pretty big rice box
she was astounded so she brought me some rice he was only a little as she didn't have much rice but then my neighbors and members of my temple collect at rice i had quite a few numbers so i have quite a lot of arise when people found out that i have
a lot of rights they came to the temple so i gave them the rice so i gave it to them
it doesn't have any relatives they bring and rise than he has a lot of than other people don't have rise than it gives them the rise and ah
so that's the way he practiced by it's sort of giving and then not worrying about receiving but always receiving always giving and always receiving
ah
an insurgent also spoke like that like suzuki roshi in this way where he often talked about
now he didn't worry about too much although he did worry but not too much and he just focus on his practice and then it is practice with was good and sincere then ah ah the needs of the of the sanga and on his family would be met
that was as strong conviction
and that may be not just for priest i mean that may be the general way to understand the economy as have symbolic exchange functions in its purity or it should function in its purity
meeting this kind of part of the invisible hand
the invisible hand is the link between the call and response the offering and what you receive back
you don't offer anything you don't receive anything back
so we have to offer first from our spirit
oh and if everybody focuses on their dominant position in their practice in the material world
though incest secular world is good world
there is no secular world outside buddhist world
so
if everybody does with date
do best can express their spirit
ah oh hardly
productively then
everything works total they're now working
but that requires a different kind of spirit and usually river with material wheel is run by the ego
and gaining idea
instead of just sincere complete practice
oh giving us are completely
an offering something useful to the world
ben symbolic exchange works

at that time most people who lived in the city went to the farming families and exchange whatever possessions they could for food potatoes rice seed potatoes pumpkin
so they had a
a kind of market or exchanged
i was speaking to somebody in work with listen boss me happened in bosnia now is a pretty much destroyed country in people are having to exchange fruit
ah
most of the time i have plenty of food but i didn't feel so good eating something different from other people so i tried to eat the same food as they did
here the sahara the food is wonderful strong and rich in comparison to the food we had in wartime
so i had not had any complaint about the food if we observe a way strictly we will surely be protected by buddha we will trust people and will will trust buddha
since the war germany's precepts started to wear western suits
getting up there buddhist robes
i'm not sure how prevalent that is or much will you have heard about that
oh
giving up their buddhists roads unless they're performing a funeral or memorial service
right so i think the concern there's
oh there's so much because surgeon thought that when we left the temple we should wear ordinary common
it shouldn't be walking around with special bro standing out from other people
oh
so better bodhisattva practice is just to blend with people and then practice out there
oh
although
oh
i mean is this has been a
him
some people disagree you know some people think monks you wear robes all day
oh but if you were monks that you were rogues all day it's difficult to engage in the in the ordinary a world without sticking out too much
and of but sometimes people think that sometimes amongst think that sometimes lay people think that i've had like people tell me all you know view of you have your psychologists you'd be you know that means you're you're in the world you're not really a among condition you should wear robes you should you should tell
either not wear robes and all and just be a teacher or or or wear robes and where him all day
so we all have many different ways of thinking about this
ah but the idea is not to wear the robes without the practice the wear robes without the the practice of of chicken taza and then we just performing social ceremony switched our valuable they may be but the the robe and the practice in the ceremonies is not
rooted in dharma and i think that was the superior she's concerned
when i was coming to america almost all the priests who were going abroad war good suits and shiny shoes they thought that in order to propagate buddhism they had to be like the american people
but their heads were not shining
their hair was pretty long and low calm rather than shaved off
ah but even though they buy the best suits and the best shoes japanese the japanese they cannot be american people and american people will find some fault in the way they were their suits and shoes
this is one reason why i didn't come to america in a suit
oh
you i used to have long hair when i was younger you know in the twenties
it's those were the days
and up
ah i thought oh when do we give so much important to the hair ah is it more a question of what's in your mind that how long your hair is ah
but ah
ah eventually i like over that i'm so you always told me it just keep my my hair short
and i difficult to shaving it because i was concerned ah you know when i when i shaved it for for ordination
ah my my patience got worried that
i reserve of cancer we're now in in the clinic and a lot of people when they have a psychotic break they shake their heads you know
having some kind of crises are around so it kind of stood out so i thought it was better to just keep it short ah and that's what sudden recommended but now now i say that because i don't have much hair and given my age nobody cares
nobody asked me anything was your his shirt ah they just as think i'm this old
oh
another reason was that i was disappointed with priest would change the roads into suits to support themselves
when dogan said we are firmly protected from within that is our spirit we say we pray the dharma wheel and the material will go smoothly forever
so
oh there's different models of practicing rights of he's thinking of the the the dharma wheel material wheel goes go smoothly by sticking to the dark to the dharma wheel and not engaging in the karmic some sorry wheels
that although that may be purer it also creates a duality between the two wheels
ah
on the other hand if with to drawn by the material we'll then the the dharma wheel or suffers
i'm on the other hand you know if we practice with both wheels it's not so easy
especially if we we're families
but sometimes you know the dharma will make us neglect our families or neglect like the material will
and then our families may get upset with us
and this was the problem with a priest having families are being married is not so much of a unethical thing where question of on
ah
ah sexual abstinence
but a question of being pulled by by responsibilities in different directions
and i've certainly experienced that in the years of practice experiencing the pool of different duties and responsibilities and so that's one of the reasons for the monk seal about their families will be married so that they're not pulled in by a different responsibilities
oh so to harmonize those responsibilities is not easy and it all depends on the strength of our or marriages and families and whatnot and and the support of the family and where the family supports the practice or not
where they feel that the the family member who practices ah being taken away by the practice is mark a hurtful to the family then whatever married a benefit comes from the the practice back into the family
i'm so it's easy to say procedures say oh yeah let's not be do list a dualistic and just practice with both wheels but it's not so easy to practice with both wheel so therefore suzuki russia's as a point
on the other hand you know you have people
in our community who say things like oh i don't i don't talk to anybody outside the sungai only relate my social link is are completely constituted by ah within the summer i don't talk to anybody who's not a buddhist
ah why don't i talked to anybody who's was not a buddhist all because if i talked to somebody who's not a buddhist the teaching tells me that i'm supposed to convert them into the practice and since you can't convert anybody into the practice because people have to come to the practice through their own
will and desire ah so then i can do that either so then therefore i don't talk to anybody outside the the buddhist community of the buddhist monk and you can see there's a logic to that but is it also restraints sangha to just the buddhist community
where's we have the largest anger which is the world

dogan says if we do not practice our way with everyone with all sentient beings with everything in the world on the cosmic stage that is not the buddhist way
the cosmic stage
not the town stage
now the country stage
not the earth's stage is the cosmic state so it's pretty it's a pretty universal ah statement which includes everything nothing left out
nobody left out

the spirit of zazen practice should always be with us especially when we recite sutras or of serve ceremonies
it is not a dualistic a selfish practice but as com and deep with from our conviction
when we practice in that way we're always one with the whole buddha world
where there is no karmic activity
buddha a world here means universal world not just the a strictly speaking the saga will is sanga
where there is no karmic activity and our everyday life will be protected by the kind of power which pervades everywhere
so there's a power that pervades everywhere there's a different kind of power
it's not what we are nearly called power
usually what we ordinary called power is selfish powers ego power is a different kind of power which actually is a lot more powerful but we don't realize that
i'm in the world economy activity so if we practice in the world the material world then we ought to be careful of not creating more karma for ourselves in binding ourselves in our own karma which we do anyway
and then we have to practice it off
so the a corner is born through body speech and mind
so we have to be careful what we do with our bodies
and we have to be careful what we do with our minds
and the kinds of thoughts that we entertain
and hold onto
ah all kinds of situations emerge not everything is calm and peaceful in life
we get angry
i'm i used to have a problem with anger
i'm
i family in general
oh various ah zeng jinyan is in spanish is a sung in you know it's like spaniards are some of the native americans sangguniang you know strong blood ah
so a that can make you quick to anger you know so
i'm
in anger is is is a a a problem
we understand psychologically it's inevitable that anger you know weekends swallow it we can't spit it there it is what do we do with it
ah but ah
but you know we can live in a world that too many angry people everybody upset with everybody else
for one reason or another
we don't like their system they don't like our system
ah
so just a buddha says
he doesn't fight with the world
but the world fight with him
so how does packed town is buddha practice when the world fights with him
does he fight back
he doesn't fight
oh
so we have to consider that
in a buddha wasn't political
because he didn't wanna get into ball in struggle for power for gauge ah
jd power taking power or helping people take power
i'm sorry he kind of look with sadness as people
fought with each other
oh
on the other hand you know politics social application of responsibility for others and taking care of other people
and helping those who can't take care of themselves
and so that's the function of government
and having the right government that serves the interests of the people ladders
so we have to can find a balance there
in terms of what's the right action words right action and what how do we
ah
not add more strikes to the world and more division
and war animosity
at the same time not withdraw
oh
will become cynical
very it easy to become cynical nowadays because they are many
hogan ah compromised
the way or another so we have to that's why everybody's depressed
we have to maintain the conviction in hope in the practice certainly helps us with that be support from within
so ah so we can remain somewhat of a positive presence in the world for a small as we live
oh

the karma is also speech
so then we have to be careful to be well spoken
because we're not perfect we not always well spoken
ah but
know when we're not well spoken when we create some karma
and i'm
so we have to be careful with how we speak in what we say
and the more mature we become the more
careful we have to be in somewhere
with our conduct and of body speech and mind

if we're too involved in the idea of time were taken care of the material world we will lose our way a priests will not be a priest when he's completely involved in dualistic practice involved in a busy life in the busy mundane world
well so does said you know when you go out in the world just be completely deluded within delusion don't be thinking about enlightenment just immerse yourself assuming that the above the activity is wholesome just completely immerse yourself in the activity in the much
journal world
so that's a different kind of meaning of being the leader within delusion meaning being completely and ball and forgetting yourself and ah which is not been completely involved into holistic practice a completely law dualistic practice is kind of are setting yourself apart from other seven and
tom are trying to gain something
at the expense of others
ah because with if we completely involved in dualistic practice than there are no more priest even though priest are there they are not practicing the priests way
so buddhism should be buddhist completely avoid is really becomes the buddhist he will be supported as a buddhist
thank you very much

now we have lead time for questions and anyone now please raise your digital and and will
see raul can answer your questions

you can also send it to the chat and i would read it out

decades almost traditional and familiar open my mouth so i guess i will when you talked about to a long time a console it's welcome thank you linda we talk about dental surgeon roshi in the diluted diluted in the delay
heated world how do you think he really
saw himself not how we wanted us to be but himself in the world and his diluted way can you speak about that
well i think he meant just being completely immersed and not creating a separation between being a blister or enlightenment and and illusion makes of being completely immersed in the burning yourself from
bleakley in the activity oh without judgement oh
but you know he'll have often are also spoke about how you will he will get really annoyed you know driving for example
you'd get annoyed with traffic people cutting marv somebody passing him and then slowing down and on
you know ah and so he he would allow himself i mean to to am
to get angry right he said that i think i get angry just get angry
and
they will always feel that way when you got angry with me and outlet oh
ah i wish he was more safely at that point ah and the but that's that's the way he was you know and so we just took him that way
but his anger was voluntary
ah was just a flash
i saw he didn't he didn't
ah hold onto it or let it let it turn into a ill will towards anybody
oh
so i think that was part of him being deluded within delusion meaning not sure that moment of anger was enlightening a delusion not sure
ah but it was what it was completely and then he didn't hold onto it so i couldn't hold onto it either
thank you know we have a question from ross ross go ahead thanks again a decade
we enjoy what you're talking about with regard to the teacher seemingly being outside but actually has carried with it us and i'm wondering how do we discern the teachings think that we
i don't necessarily agree with or don't like and having that be a part of us are not being a part of us versus the thing that feels that a warm were encouraging or supportive that we have an easier time with so how do we discern the difference between those two and a
and
prevent having something reside within us that actually is not helpful or encouraging and actually kind of undermines our practice thank you
i'm
well there's a i think i was sort of
oh referring to that when i said
that
oh i feel after your dog is like for example with parents
appearance is mixed bag so there within you but the the influence of them within you is not always positive frame right
ah
and yet and i i i felt that like everybody else
even up to not with my father so much but with my mother you know there's can some intense feelings but then act she died all that both with my father my stepfather and my mother is like all that stuff
a washed away
and the only thing that remains is sort of the the support from within
and and the strong connection
and i feel that was so urgent to you know i mean i i have
difficulties with sojourn over the years different times you know
ah but it's not there anymore
it's gone
so how do we let go of it before they die
well i think we have to make whatever effort we can before they die to lego of stuff
i always recommend it and people do that and i made a point of doing that with my parents it can always do it because often they don't want to talk about it
ah
and i i couldn't do that restaging
oh but it didn't matter because know what was there already firmly rooted establish with so much are meaningful and stronger than that and i felt the love in the connection there
behind everything
oh so with sajjan you know it wasn't because he's a teacher is you know it's a it's a ah it's different with buddha than with your parents
so i felt that it wasn't necessary
oh the last time i saw him or was it at his house and was a kind of for bar because he had arranged for me to come over
adam posen had called me and said you should go see him i called them and are so we arrange a time to me and then unbeknownst to him or to me liz arrange a meeting at the same time with closer
so we ended up having a meeting the three of us
and now
he was he was quite warm
and the last bow in looking at each other's i was was quite warm loving and that's what i that's what i keep
that's what i keep
and i think that's her practice you know that's that's how we each time we sit we let go of that you know we recognize the things that are difficult and we let them go and then we allow ourselves to be different and we allow other people to be different
every time
as perfect thanks so much newer cameras
dinky we have a commenter that you can respond to from patrick he says over time i've appreciated mel's teachings
the ones i most disliked have become the most memorable and instructive
thank you patrick are actually that that's a teaching that
echoes with a lock-on you know lock-on used to say the the people that he appreciate the most where is angry critics his are ah critics are because he he thought that that helped advance the teaching the most
and that echoes the dog in who says are you know you can't twining binds with inclining lines
you don't cut training lines with uninteresting but got them with tiny months so as tiny vines cutting timing lines but that's how the transmission takes place so there's always some entanglement
and some misunderstanding and that's part of the the fuel for the for the transmission and i was clearly prominent dobyns teaching
so i think you're a good company country
thank you and jerry oliva has a question go head during during oh that's so great to see you yeah so great to see it's new i missed you i guess you were gonna do lunch anyway
i was interested in europe a mentioning the insularity of the saga how that can be almost tell a a barrier in some ways to to really opening to the wolf the broader opening to a sovereign beings
oh and our ability to just be ourselves with everybody and and by being ourselves assuming that we've done our work that's all we have to do and it's important to
to really expose ourselves to other views so that we don't get trapped in six years are thinking thinking we're right in some way
i agree with you during
thank you for saying that but i think i mean to give us some credit i think it's part of the spirit of bcc in part of with the spirit that the surgeon gave us because he practiced that way he'd keep he didn't insulate himself the you know if he led mostly within the
sanga but his attitude and scooters with a broad an open to the world so i think we we we have that practice and bcc
as you say jerry
thank you had ten k we have a question from susan marvin go ahead susan
i know ceases and where susan
i saw her earlier
here i am hi ralph for hi susan
it's good to see you and thank you so much for this a lovely talk
i loved that story that he told about the rice and arms
i think the way surgeon used to say it was keep everything in circulation ah
and
it i like he didn't like getting gifts because i remember him saying don't be surprised or don't be offended if i give it to someone else and
and i've been thinking about that lately and i wonder if you could say more about or just talk about you know as a priest and as a teacher and as a person how you think about that keep everything in circulation
ah
well ah
well that's what i'm saying you know in god we trust
use is a snob
it's just a piece of paper
but we keep the goal of the earth in circulation
oh
is it in the paper really it isn't in the paper
i'm so we have to keep the gold of good nature in in circulation with each other so that's part of the the are offering in the call and response and keep ourselves in circulation even though we haven't been much in circulation i just got my back seat
in i've seen
get the second thing at the end of the month hopefully i'll be able to circulate ah more oh
but so did was very generous
you know he didn't have much but he always gave a lot and as an example to or to follow
you know i i also don't keep much for myself you know i am people am i helping people i support and oh so we have to keep our ah
ah recirculating the minaret
that's how we keep plan are offering a married and
sony was no a generous with me and
he gave me some gifts that i have and i will cherish for the rest of my life

thank you so much decades it's been wonderful to see you i'm actually we ever come in from nina nina where i just about out of time but the concept of the two wheels seems itself dualistic she says and she says also
surgeons teaching
is less so
can you comment on adding just a brief moment yes yes that's what i say margaret before that with superior she was saying even though i would hesitate to call it dualistic but the principal could become a dualistic if you'd
try to stay out of the material wheel and just live only on the a spiritual we'll ah
i'm so and sojourns even though he had the same spirit as suzuki roshi he the way he he practiced it enacted was a little bit different because or he did encourage us to where ordinary clothes like guy said and to be involved in the world and
and that it was it was wholesome to have right like liquid and to be able to support ourselves and you know not have to be didn't on other people you know ah or be dependent on my own institution where money for support ah and then just go ahead and
a practice right livelihood in the world to support yourself and and and others you know
thank you thank you now at last we have one more question if you're willing to answer it in the time that you have
okay from helen
go ahead helen
hi ralph oh hi i am so i've been working with this idea lately that to the meanest voices the nastiest internal voices
are the ones that need the most love
and i can't articulate why but for my spending this time with you for the past hour i had this revelation that of that also goes for the outside voices then i just wanted to say thank you i don't know where it came from or how it related to what i heard
they moved by this revelation so i just wanted to express my gratitude
thank you helen
thank you for seeing them
yeah what one of the practices so or recently i noticed myself engaging in is when i'm lying down in bed sometimes if we're going to sleep
sometimes i get some negative judgments
i could see my mind going somewhere to make some kind of criticism myself why did you laser or which think that you know so then i noticed that ah
and up and then i practise start practicing or loving-kindness at that moment and just hum
ah
opening my body up to to the experience of of of or of love and warmth and radiance and then i fall asleep
but with a video pavlov's inner voices are angry critical in voices that we have to practice with and in the same by the same token how we respond to other people's ah ah comments that may be negative
critical or angry in the same way
i'm not sure that answers your question but thank you for your voice