So this is our fourth, not class, but fourth time that I'm talking about this, Tenzo Kyoku. So now Dogen starts to talk about his experience with the Tenzos that he met in China. And he says, when I was at Mount Tiantong, a monk called Lu from Qingyuan Fu was serving as Tenzo. So Tiantong, Mount Tiantong was where the Tiantong Shan Monastery is still, where Dogen's teacher, Ru Jin, was.

[01:11]

And when we went to China, we visited Mount Tiantong, the monastery at Tiantong. It was a very nice experience. And we saw where Nogen Satsang is, and that was nice. So I have some picture in my mind about Mount Tiantong, which is different than the last time I read this. Before I went to China, I have a different picture. So when I was at Mount Tiantong, a monk called Lu from Qingyuan Fu was serving as Tenzo. One day after the noon meal, I was walking to another building within the complex when I noticed Lou drying mushrooms in the sun in front of the Butsuden. Butsuden is the Buddha hall where they do the services. He carried a bamboo stick but had no hat on his head.

[02:12]

In other words, he used a stick to walk with. The sun's rays beat down so harshly that the tiles along the walks burned one's feet. Lou worked hard and was covered with sweat. I could not help but feel that the work was too much of a strain for him. His back was a bow drawn taut and his long eyebrows were crane white. I approached and asked his age. He replied that he was 68. Still a young man. years old. Then I went on to ask him why he never used any assistance. He answered, other people are not me. That was a very poignant remark. Other people are not me. This is my work and this is what I have to do. And I can't give it to somebody else. Can't ask somebody else to do this. So Dogen says, you're right.

[03:17]

I said, I can see that your work is the activity of the Buddhadharma, but why are you working so hard in this scorching sun? He replied, if I do not do it now, when else can I do it? So this is also interesting remark, you know, because whether it's scorching hot, or the weather's nice, or it's raining, or snowing, he has to do what he has to do. And he just does it. So this is like, he's showing an example of, like, I have to do this, and this is what I do. That's all. It doesn't matter whether it's hot or cold. And there was nothing else for me to say. As I walked along that passageway, I began to sense inwardly the true significance of the role of the Tenzo.

[04:24]

He'd never thought about this before. Because in Japan, Buddhism came to Japan and it was received by the royalty and the literati and before Dogen's time probably for three or four hundred years Buddhism was scholarly and there were some practices, it's true, there were practices but there was the Tentai school and the Shingon school But the role of work as practice was never a popular thing in Japan before Dogen's time. So Dogen sometimes talks about this lazy Tenzo in the monastery, you know, who just lays around all day, and he criticizes him as an example.

[05:37]

But this kind of brought something home to Dogen which was new. He hadn't experienced this in Japan at all. That work was practice. So I arrived in China. in April of 1223. But being unable to disembark immediately, I stayed on board the ship in the port of Ningbo. And we were in Ningbo. It was nice. One day in May, while I was talking with the captain, an old monk, about 60 years of age, came directly to the ship to buy mushrooms from the Japanese merchants on board. I invited him for tea and asked him where he was from. He said that he was the Tenzo at the monastery on Mount Ayuwang. And he added, I am originally from Sichu, although I have left there over 40 years ago. I am 61 this year and have practiced in several Zen monasteries in this country.

[06:39]

Last year, while living at Gu Yun, I visited the monastery on Mount Ayu Wong. Though I spent my time there, totally confused as to what I was doing. This is a kind of self-effacement. This is a very Chinese way of introducing yourself with a kind of self-effacing statement. I was, you know, very confused. I remember I went to Chinatown to buy some brushes and ink and paper. And I'm trying to remember the name of the interesting name of the little shop. But it was a nice salesman, the owner. And we talked about calligraphy and stuff. And he asked me, well, Do you do good work?

[07:41]

And I said, no, my work is, you know, very amateurish, not very good. And he said, oh, most Americans would say, oh yes, my painting, my work is very good. I don't think that's true, necessarily, but that was his impression. He said, in China, no one says, my work is good, or, yeah, it's okay, or something. They always have a self-effacing statement about their work, whether it's good or not. So he says, then, and also, Mount Iyuan, we visited. And Mount Ayuwong is, the Tenzo says it was 14 miles from Tiantong, but it seemed like it was a lot further the way we went, because we went from Mount Ayuwong, from Ayuwong Monastery to Tiantong, and so the Tenzo must have walked over the hill or something, you know, more direct path, whereas the road was, you know, more roundabout and seemed to take a lot longer than

[08:57]

than a 14-mile trip, but when you think about it, 14 miles, anyway, you'll see. Then after the summer practice period last year, I was appointed Tenzo. Tomorrow is the May the 5th, but I have nothing special to offer the monks. May 5th is Cinco de Mayo, but it's also Bodhidharma's birthday. So, we never celebrate Bodhidharma's birthday, but I always forget, and everybody forgets. But it would be nice to celebrate Bodhidharma's birthday on Cinco de Mayo. But this is, that's what he means by May 5th. He says, tomorrow is May 5th, but I have nothing special to offer the monks. I wanted to prepare a noodle soup, but as I did not have any mushrooms to put in it, I came here to buy some. And I asked, well, when did you leave Ayuwong?

[10:00]

And he replied, after lunch. Is it far from here? Oh, about 14 miles. Well, when will you go back to your temple? I'm planning to return as soon as I bought the mushrooms. So that's 28 miles in one day. You can't imagine how fortunate I feel that we were able to meet unexpectedly like this. If it's possible, I wish you would stay a while longer and allow me to offer you something more. I'm sorry, but that is impossible just now. If I am not there tomorrow to prepare the meal, it will not be made well. But surely there must be others in a place as large as Ayuwang who are capable of preparing the meals. They will not be that inconvenienced if you're not there, will they? I mean, somebody else can do it if you're not there." He says, nope. I've been put in charge of this work in my old age. It is, so to speak, the practice of an old man. How can I entrust all that work to others?

[11:04]

Moreover, when I left the temple, I did not ask for permission to stay out overnight. But why, when you're so old, do you have to work hard, do you have to do the hard work of a tenzo? Why don't you spend your time practicing zazen, or working on the koans of former teachers? Is there something special to be gained from working particularly as a tenzo?" He burst out laughing and remarked, "'My good friend from abroad, you do not yet understand what practice is all about, nor do you know the meaning of characters. When I heard the old monk's words, I was taken aback and felt greatly ashamed. So I asked him, what are characters and what is practice? He replied, if you do not deceive yourself about this problem, you will be a person of the way. At that time, I was unable to grasp the meaning of his words. If you don't understand, please come to Mount Iyuang sometime.

[12:08]

and we will talk about the nature of characters more fully. With that, he rose quickly. It is getting late and the sun is about to set. I am afraid I cannot stay any longer. Then he left for Mataiwang." So he gave Dogen this kind of koan about characters. Characters means, like Chinese characters, but it also means dharmas. There are layers of meaning in the Tenzo's use of the word characters. So it also means things. You know dharmas, there's the dharma which is the law or Buddha's teaching. And then there are the dharmas, which are the specific psychic, psychophysical elements of our existence, but they also, everything is like a dharma, or in this case, a character.

[13:24]

So in other words, you don't know the meaning of particular things. You don't know the meaning of the differentiation of oneness. I have a note here to myself that says, if you understand the true meaning of your question, that is the true meaning of practice and of characters. Where we say, the answer is in the question. So that's why we investigate the question, not to find some other answer, but to understand the question.

[14:33]

In July of the same year, I stayed on Mount Tiantong. One day, the Tenzo from Aiyuan came to see me, and he said, as the summer practice period has ended, I shall be retiring as the Tenzo and plan to return home. I heard that you were here and wanted very much to talk with you and see how you were doing." Apparently, Dogen impressed people when he was in China. I was indeed happy to see him and received him cordially. We talked about various things and finally came to the matter he had touched on board the ship concerning the practice and study of characters. He said, a person who studies characters must know just what characters are, and one intending to practice the way must understand what practice is. I asked him once again, well, what are characters? One, two, three, four, five, he replied.

[15:37]

What is practice? There is nothing in the world that is hidden. That's their little dialogue, their mando. I asked him once again, what are characters? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, he replied. I mean, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 means all activities are practice. Everything you encounter is practice. All the elements of your life are characters, are practice. There is nothing in the world that is hidden. So, the Dharma manifests through all things.

[16:42]

So Chinese Buddhism was very practical, not so mystical. So this Tenzo is bringing him down to earth, in a sense. The sixth patriarch, many centuries before, expressed the Dharma in the simplest terms the simplest down-to-earth terms and he changed the nature of Buddhism in China that's why he's so famous because he took Buddhism out of the realm of speculation and mysticism brought it into people's everyday lives.

[17:55]

And this is pretty much the nature of Buddhism in China, and this is what Dōgen took back to Japan. So this also means that we have to find our way moment by moment, that nothing is fixed. Dharma manifests itself in every moment's situation and there's no particular way that works in every situation. You have to find your way in every moment situation. So, Dogen says, although we talked about many other things, I will not mention them here.

[19:02]

Whatever little bit I have learned about characters and practice is largely due to that Tenzo. When I met again with my teacher Miaozhen, Miaozhen is A-Sai's student who went to China with Dogen. And A-Sai took Miaozhen as his teacher. And Miaozhen died in China. So, he said, when I met again with my teacher Myosin, who later died in China, and told him of my meeting with the Tenzo from Mount Ayuwang, he was extremely happy to hear about it. Later on, I came across a gatha that Shui Du had written for one of his disciples, Shui Do. We went to the Shui Do temple too. Here's the poem. This poem is translated in various different ways, but this is the best translation I've ever seen.

[20:10]

1735. The truth you search for cannot be grasped. As night advances, a bright moon illuminates the whole ocean. The dragon's jewels are found in every wave. Looking for the moon, It is here, in this wave, in this wave, in the next wave. People say, well, what does 1735 mean? Well, there's various explanations of what 1735 means.

[21:25]

There's a little poem that seems to be consistent with 1735. One is, sleeping, the moon's light shines through the window like a bright silver coin. No one thinks anything about it. Quietly, the moon passes, shining its light near one's pillow. So, 1735, the truth you search for cannot be grasped. As night advances, a bright moon illuminates the whole ocean. Moon is like enlightenment, realization. And Dogon often talks about the moon reflected in the water, or the moon reflected in a dew drop on the grass.

[22:36]

The whole sky is reflected in a dew drop on the grass, and the moon is reflected in the water. But the water isn't disturbed, even though the moon is reflecting in the water. The moon is not disturbed and the water is not disturbed. But the waves are like the activity of the ocean. And in each wave the moon is reflected. Millions of little reflections on each bit of wave. So this is like, in our activity, in our 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 activity, enlightenment is right there.

[23:48]

But it's hard to grasp. Really hard to grasp. You can't grasp it. You can only be it. You can't see it. You have to be it. So, you know, there's zero. Zero is no number. Zero is like the moon, or zero is like a clear mirror, but when the mirror is broken into a thousand pieces, each piece reflects or reflects. So breaking the moon, breaking the mirror into a thousand pieces is like one thing expressed as a thousand things.

[24:51]

It's like oneness expressed as multiplicity. and through the multiplicity, in order to trace, in order to grasp the oneness of things, you have to do it through the multiplicity. In other words, through your activity. That's why we don't emphasize getting enlightened. We emphasize practice. We emphasize the activity. And when the activity is there, Enlightenment is there. You can't just sit around and think up enlightenment. It doesn't work. When you let go of the idea of enlightenment and just do the work, enlightenment is there. But as soon as you try to peek

[25:58]

get a peak of enlightenment, it disappears over your shoulder. It's elusive. You can be it, but you can't see it. So then Dogen says, it dawned on me It dawned on me then that what the Tenzo I had met the previous year had said coincided perfectly with what Suedue was pointing out through his gatha. I realized, more than ever, that the Tenzo was a man fully living out the Buddhadharma. I used to see the characters 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5. Now I see also 6, 7, 8, 9, and 10. Further, future students must be able to see that side from this side, as well as this side from that side.

[27:02]

Practicing with intense effort, using all your ingenuity, you will be able to grasp genuine Zen that goes beyond the surface of characters. To do otherwise will only result in being led about by various tainted Zen, that will leave you incapable of preparing skillful meals for the community. Tainted Zen means Zen that is not shikantaza. Shikantaza means just, in Zazen it means just sitting. without any motive. Not trying to be Buddha, not trying to get enlightened, not trying to change anything, just simply being in the present with what is, without discriminating. That's hard for people because we always want something.

[28:16]

We always want something better than what we have. So we have this discriminating mind which chooses better from worse, which we have to do. But shikantaza means just sitting or just chopping, or just walking, or just whatever, with nothing extra. Here are the six Where can we ask questions?

[29:28]

Anytime. Yeah, that was established in the first meeting. Do you have a question? Yes. What's the question? Well, it's not really so much of a question, it's maybe a clarification of when you say nothing extra, the way I translate that is no self. Because a self, I mean, having the self-domination, rather than a big mind-dominate. That's extra. Well, let's talk a little bit about, you know, we have to be very careful when we talk about no-self. Because the reason we talk about no-self is because there's a self. So, no-self also means there's a self. There's a big self, but there's also a small self, you know. So the small self eats and drinks and does all these things.

[30:30]

So we have to respect our small self. So when you say, no self, it simply means not being self-centered. I think that's a better way because it's more not so like saying, oh, no self. not self-centered, not selfish, not trying to get something, right? Okay, so there are six types of non-ticksides of Zen which are not Shikantaza. One is called the Zen of Hell. I think I've told you these before. The Zen of Hell is like those who are practicing for the sake of a position or are forced into it by family pressures or political pressures. Those who do it possessed by or for a friend or a spouse or forced to do it from some outside reason.

[31:44]

This is in Japan, you know, Most of the kids that go into AAG or SOGG monastery are this type. This is the Zen of health. They don't really want to do this. They want to be with their girlfriends and they want to make money. But because of the family situation, the next step after college is to go to the monastery. So that's only one example, but there are many examples. You cannot ask your spouse to do zazen, you know, and expect that that will happen. Or your friends. This is a problem, you know, with family. You know, we want our family to do what we do, but they don't do that. They can't do that. So you have to realize that your family is doing zazen by not doing zazen. Suzuki Roshi used to say, You may think that you're doing something wonderful by sitting zazen while your spouse is at home in bed.

[32:53]

But your spouse is at home in bed doing zazen while you're sitting here doing zazen. That's an unselfish mind. Or for the sake of a position, you know, in order to become a priest or in order to have some position that people admire. And then there's Hungry Zen, Hungry Ghost Zen, Gaki Zen, that's lusting after enlightenment. looking for a prize so they can be powerful, or show off, or be admired. Their practice is in the realm of desire, not way-seeking mind.

[33:56]

Restless or impatient, greedy materialistic Zen. Spiritual materialism. Lusting after enlightenment. Well, don't you want to get enlightened? Isn't that what Zen is about? Getting enlightened? Yes, it is. But if you lust after enlightenment, that's lust, it's not way-seeking mind. So you won't get enlightened that way. Enlightenment is a kind of goal of practice. But if you try to create enlightenment as a goal, it doesn't work. So, there's this little saying which I can't remember exactly, but... Enlightenment is a kind of goal, but you can't put the goal out in front of you.

[35:09]

You should not use it as a carrot, You just do the work of practice. It's like when you do the work of practice, it's right there in front of your face, but you don't see it because you're looking for something else called enlightenment. If you have an idea about enlightenment, that bars you from seeing enlightenment. So that's the problem. Just do the work for the sake of the work. Just do the practice for the sake of the practice. That's called shikantaza. Not for some other motive or to get some place. This is how the goal of practice is to be here, where you are. But we're always looking for something away from ourself. Must be out there. It'll come soon or something like that.

[36:12]

Or someday. Someday we'll all be enlightened. We'll all give up. And then there's a dependent Zen. Dependent Zen is called domestic animal. Looking for a comfortable place to spend their time. They like to practice for all the peripheral reasons. and do just enough to be able to hang out. They like the food and they like the social aspect. That's domestic animal. You hang around and you get petted and you get fed. And then there's Oh, competitive Zen.

[37:15]

Macho Zen. Competitive. Question. Where did you find these? They're right there in the book. Oh, they are? Yeah. They seem so current. What? They seem so up to date. They are very up to date, yes. Well, I think a lot of this is my own commentary. I see. Yeah. competing to gain satori, you know. Let's see who can get satori first. Compete to gain... It's like, also, you know, these guys that go around with a big... Rinzai monastery, they go around with a big stick, you know, beating people with it. And then the monks, the young monks, vie with each other to see who can hit each other the hardest, breaking the stick and all this, and just beat the devil out of each other. There, of course, if the devil left, If they really beat the devil out of each other, there wouldn't be any devil. Anyway, they compete to gain position, compete to gain recognition, vying for dominance, breaking the Kiyosaku to prove their manhood.

[38:29]

Macho Zen, competing to see whose practice is the most severe and who can be the most ascetic. or sitting in a seat when everybody else is doing kin-hin. Tsuki-goshi would never allow that. When everybody gets up for kin-hin, you get up for kin-hin too. When everybody eats, you eat. When everybody goes to bed, you go to bed. So, you don't stay up all night studying in order to advance yourself or sit longer in order to deepen your enlightenment. You just simply go along with everybody and practice. And by practicing, this is very Japanese style, but there's a reason for it. It's like you don't stand out as somebody special. As long as you want to stand out as somebody special, there's no enlightenment there.

[39:34]

And then there's the, oh yeah, utilitarian zen. Utilitarian zen. Zen for utilitarian purposes, to get the head straightened out, or for good health, or sexual stamina, to preserve your youth, to gain something. or Zen and the art of to get some return for your effort. Now isn't it true that some temples in Japan run these workshops for corporate executives who throw them into cold, freezing water? There are these extreme practices, that's true. But these executives pay a lot of money in order to be tortured by the priest.

[40:44]

Well, there's a Zen business in Japan. And I saw that there's, what is this? Oh God, it was really, it was a clothing store. It was a clothing market, you know, like, and it was a fad and it was called Zen. Zen clothing or something like that. And it was just the most outrageous kind of stuff, you know, faddish stuff. And they were selling it as Zen. It was pretty amazing. Yeah. Well, those six, what did you call them, the wrong way or what? Six sands which are not Shikantaza. Well, it seems to me that a lot of us, I mean, perhaps I shouldn't speak for other people, but a lot of us have come to this practice through one of those not-so-great gates. That's right. But, the wonderful part is that we enter through those gates, you know, domestic animal you do, but then many of us come to a more, let's say, untainted,

[41:55]

practice. So I don't think we should put them down. And I wonder what, short of going to China, what was your experience of this story and having gone to China? Has the story been enriched? And the point about that is, and then afterwards, and how does that all kind of fit into our practice when we're struggling to understand? Well, I think I understood what I understood before I went to China. I don't think that China helped my understanding. It just kind of broadened my perspective, my experience, you know, of being in the place. But as far as helping to understand the the dialogue or whatever, I don't think that changed anything for me.

[43:05]

But being in China helped to understand what it was like to live there, even though everything is different today, still. Although the cities are built up in China, or they're being built up, the countryside is still countryside. to a great extent, and the old monasteries are still there, and there's not much around them, you know, because they were built in the mountains. And so, when I, you know, going to Ningbo, Ningbo was the port that most Japanese priests or monks went to when they went to China. And it was nice to be at Ningbo. And then we went to an island, right? Matputuo. And then up to the top of that, Jingshan. And then you realize, when Dogen went to China, you know, there were no cars.

[44:09]

There were no buses. And the roads weren't very wide, like they are today. he must have spent all his time walking, or on a mule, or I don't know how they got around, but big distances, you know, big distances. And so when I read that Seppo and Ganto, you know, visited Tozan and Yaxan, you know, seven times, You read that and you think, well, so what? But if you were there, you see the big distances these guys had to walk or travel in order to get to these places. And there were bandits. How did they eat? They didn't have any money. They had to beg their way. It doesn't say all that in the books.

[45:09]

But if you think about how a monk made his journey over a thousand miles, or even a hundred miles, or a couple hundred miles, without any money, and with only three robes and a bowl. You know, they didn't have a lot of heavy clothes, and when the winter came, we don't have much conception of how these people lived in those days, and survived. It was very, you know, and they didn't have central heating, and they didn't have clean water and you know of course there wasn't as much pollution but and then they had to eat and they were vegetarians. But how does that influence your practice now? Is it an overwhelming appreciation for the sincerity that they had, the earnestness to

[46:16]

and all these obstacles and not take for granted the central key and the relative comfort that we live in now that we really shouldn't complain about? Well, I think both of those things. The folks of old, you know, who did this, you know, had many more obstacles, which is probably true. you know, came up to the challenge and did all that stuff. And he said, we could at least do something like that, you know. So, yeah, it's very inspiring, actually. And it just, you get the feeling, you know, you get some feeling that you absorb. That's more than what you can express, I think. It's just a feeling, you know, to be in the same place. But, you know, a lot of those temples were destroyed in the Cultural Revolution and rebuilt.

[47:18]

But you still get a feeling for their practice. Richard? We were talking about the non-shikantaza types of practice. And someone said, well, that's one of the reasons. Many of us come through the gate. And then someone else said, how long should we be there? And it strikes me that maybe The way I've always explained it is that we all come to practice for selfish reasons. We don't know that, but we come for a reason of, I want something.

[48:20]

Or something, we want something. when we actually put ourselves into practice, even though we have those reasons, then we learn about what the real reason is for practice. And then at some point, after some period of time, we reach a certain kind of maturity. And you can tell when a person has reached maturity, at least that much maturity, when they're no longer practicing just for themselves. When you're no longer practicing just for yourself, then you've reached that certain kind of maturity that's Shikantaza. But not all of us are practicing Shikantaza, but at least in its purest sense. So we should all ask ourselves, you know,

[49:25]

Well, what am I doing? What is practice? And what is pure practice? So, there's practicing for yourself and then there's practicing for others. But both practicing for yourself and practicing for others is still not Shikantaza. Practicing for the sake of practice takes care of yourself and takes care of others. So pure practice is simply practicing for the sake of practice. So, you know, someone said, don't say I'm cleaning the toilet for you. I'm just cleaning the toilet. I'm not cleaning it for me and I'm not cleaning it for you. I'm just cleaning the toilet. And Suzuki Roshi would say, we just wash the windows. We don't wash the windows to get them clean.

[50:27]

We just wash the windows. It doesn't matter whether they're clean or dirty. We just wash the window. You don't get up in the morning and brush your teeth because they're dirty. You just brush your teeth. That's all. Because brushing your teeth is what you're doing. You don't sweep the floor because it's dirty, although it's much more, you know, satisfying to sweep a dirty floor. But we just sweep the floor because that's what we're doing. That's the thing to do. So it takes it out of the realm of preference. Yes? Well, sometimes I think this is wrong thinking. Sometimes you do, wrong thinking? Well, I was just practicing what I was trying to get out. I think if I just sit and let cobwebs form, and dust fall, and dust bunnies happen, and dust mites mate, and filth, well, let's not even use the word filth, you know, that's just, just the whole, a whole ecological system form around me as I sit.

[51:42]

What's wrong with that? That's Mahavira's practice. Is that a good practice? In Buddha's time, the Jains, in India there are the Jains who were parallel to Buddhism. They came around about the same time in India. And the Jains, Mahavira was the founder of the Jain religion, I believe. And the Jains, Mahavira stood in one place for about three years without moving. And grass grew up around him, and the cobwebs, and all those things you mentioned, right? But that's not Buddhist practice.

[52:48]

The giants had a stick, or had a broom. They still do. They don't wear any clothes. And they... It's hot in India. And they brush their broom, sweep the ground in front of them so they don't step on any little creatures or insects or anything like that. That's, you know, there's some nice aspects about the Jains, but that's not Buddhism. When you said... What does that matter? What does what matter? Whether it's Buddhism or not. Well I'm just saying it's not Buddhist practice. She's saying, trying to define Buddhist practice. She's saying, in zazen, you let the cobwebs, right? Right. So I'm saying, in zazen, you're sitting with total dynamic energy, no cobwebs. No cobwebs. You should be sitting with all of your energy, not just... That's not zazen.

[53:54]

It's sitting up with energy, using, you know, all inducing energy. And then when you get off the cushion, you feel energized. And your energy permeates the Zen Do. And you're helping everybody without trying to help anybody. You're supporting everybody's practice without trying to support anybody. You're simply taking care of practice for the sake of practice. You know, you're cooking meals for the assembly, but you're not saying, even though you're cooking meals for the assembly, you forget about cooking meals for the assembly. You're just cooking meals. You're just cooking for the sake of cooking, and you're making cooking. You're not cooking for anybody in particular. You're not even going to make a nice meal for the abbot. I always thought that... I always thought that, say out of sashay, the food, everything is a concerted effort toward zazen.

[55:09]

It is zazen. Right. Not toward something else. Working in the kitchen is zazen. Serving is zazen. Accepting the food is zazen. It's all Zazen. All the different forms of Zazen. So, that's why during Sashin we're totally living in the realm of Zazen, whatever we do. Poor Andrea has had her hand up so many times. Oh, that Andrea. Switching back for a second, I share your sense of awe in having been to China, the practice places that we were at, and yet as you were talking, what I was struck by was this real sense of how difficult it is for us to practice here.

[56:15]

I asked someone recently how to simplify my life so that I could practice more deeply outside of the monastery, and he said walk to work. And I think about how much effort we make at the monastery to go without heat and to eat simple food and to live simply and how that supports a practice that helps me be mindful and see clearly and how hard it is for me to find that in the life here. It's not to romanticize how hard it was 13th century China, but I have a real humility for how hard it is to practice in our life. Yeah. It's not hard and it's not easy. That's Shikantaza. If you think it's hard, you have a problem. It's not hard and it's not easy. It's just simply whatever you do. It's just simply whatever you're doing. So what you think is hard is just another form of your life.

[57:19]

There was a time when everybody was riding their bikes to Zazen. The bike rack was full. And now it's empty. I don't know why that is. People are employed. They all have jobs now. We've had inclement weather. That's true. We've had inclement weather. But I think, how far do you have to go to walk? Well, over to Elk Bates. To go to work, it's about 14 or 15 miles from here. You'd start out at 2 o'clock in the morning. Well, you know, you have to, you know, whatever your... This thing about simplifying your life is tricky.

[58:33]

Because simplifying your life doesn't necessarily mean to just do a bunch of simple things. It means that whatever you're doing, to do it in the most simple way. To keep the mind uncluttered. That's right. Right. It's not a matter of, you know, how many things you're doing. I mean, that does make a difference. But it's like how you approach whatever it is you're doing. Jerry had her hand up. It was an airplane, so you have to... I was kind of stuck in the beginning when you talked about when Doping was having a conversation with one of the cooks and it was hot out and he said, you know, how come you don't have anybody helping you? you know, I'm doing what I need to be doing. And it almost sounded like somebody saying, I can do it myself.

[59:36]

Or, you know, don't help me, I'm going to do it. It almost felt like it was providing what he was saying. It has that tone. I agree with you that it does. So we give Dogen the benefit of the doubt. Brother Cook, the benefit of the doubt that he's not meaning that you know, being egotistical about it. But it could sound like an egotistical statement, only I can do this, you know. Is that what you mean? Yeah. But I think it could go that way, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt because Dogen, I don't think, would be using him as an example if that's what he was saying. So the other side is that he's saying, this is my job, and somebody else shouldn't be doing my job. I should be doing my job. Oh, I was going back to simplifying your life, and I found

[60:50]

Right. Well, that's the simplification. It takes place inside rather than outside. I also had a question about that paragraph when the cook says, well, if I don't do it now, when will I do it? Yeah. Well, I think you said something like that was his feeling of responsibility. Yes. I thought, I was wondering that another aspect was a kind of reverence for life, like this is my life and I'm going to use myself. Well, yeah, that's true. It also is a reverence for life, what he's doing, for, you know, to not waste anything, which means not wasting time, or not wasting energy, or not in the sense of being totally with what he's doing, present.

[62:24]

I think that's so. And isn't the work The work that he had to do or the work that we all have to do, everybody has different work to do. Yeah. I mean, if you think of it like the work I need to do for me, for Andrea, is different than, let's say, what Malcolm needs to do for Malcolm. That's right. That's what I thought he was saying. That's right. I'm doing what I have to do. You do what you have to do. And everybody does what they have to do. We don't interfere with each other. We just, yeah. And when you're doing that, the whole place is in harmony. Paul? Paul had his hand up. Thank you. I was thinking, it's not like a change of subject. When you're doing zazen, there's lots of constant correction going on.

[63:31]

You're constantly correcting. And so there's ways that's okay, but then there's, I think that sometimes I can go into an attitude, maybe it's subtly sliding into it, an attitude where it may be not so good. How do you? There are two levels of discrimination that we have to be aware of. One is when we say no discrimination, it means not to discriminate on the basis of ego or self-centeredness. Not to discriminate on the basis of desire or wanting in the sense of

[64:31]

ego. And then there's discrimination in which you have to choose between things. You have to make, we make choices all the time, constantly making choices. But those choices are not based on self-centeredness. So when you, we don't correct ourselves in Zazen, we simply readjust. So the point of Zazen is to sit up straight and all those things that we do. And then when you drift, you come back because that's your intention. Your intention is when you sit down is to sit up straight and do Zazen. But then your mind wanders and your posture droops and so forth. And so you're readjusting, right? You're bringing everything back to your intended activity. So, when you sit zazen, you make an intention that you will sit for 40 minutes and zazen in a certain posture and so forth, with a certain intention.

[65:51]

And then, as the intention, as you forget, for various reasons, then you remember. And remembering is called waking up. Remembering is called waking and coming back. So you drift and you come back. That's not discrimination. That's simply reasserting your intention. Sometimes I sort of try to remind myself what I think Zazen is. Well, it's easy. For instance, paying attention. just being aware of him, which is actually sometimes not so obvious of the differences, and I have to think about that. Well, wait a minute. Then you start getting yourself into an intellectual tangle. Just drop the whole thing. As soon as you start getting into that, in order to realize you're doing that, you have to No.

[66:56]

No. Yeah, just drop it. The easy way, the easy way is, as soon as you sit down, you give yourself zazen instruction. Give yourself, like you're talking to somebody else, give yourself zazen. And then all during the practice period of zazen, you keep giving yourself zazen instruction. And anything else is not necessary. talking to yourself, making rationalizations and all this, not necessary. All that's necessary is keep giving yourself zazen instruction. You cross your legs, you sit up straight, you put your hands in the mudra, your teeth like this, your back is like that, your shoulders, blah, blah, blah. And you just keep going over and over and keeping that in place. That's all you have to do. Anything else is extra. Isn't that deliberate thinking? Yes, deliberate thinking. That is. It's thinking the thought of Zazen. Back straight.

[67:59]

That's right. So thinking the thought of Zazen is Zazen itself. Back straight. Thoughts going by. The scenery is going by. Just let it go by. Everything is just appearing. Everything is appearing and disappearing. And then there is a body and consciousness sitting on a black cushion. And you don't discriminate, I like this, I don't like that, this is good, this is bad. You can't judge a period of zazen as to whether it was good or bad. You can't say my zazen is good or my zazen is bad. As soon as you say my zazen, that's already bad.

[69:02]

It's just zazen. It's just zazen. This is where you can let go of being mine, even though there's somebody sitting Zazen. But it's not good, it's not bad, you know, even though there's pain, it's just that. If there's this pleasure, it's just that. And then one switches with the other, and you accept everything equally. That's non-discrimination. As soon as you fall into, I like it or don't like it, I want it or don't want this or that, then it's discriminating mind. But you are discriminating, but it's not on the basis of self-centeredness.

[70:08]

It's not on the basis of like and dislike, want and not want. You put yourself in this position and you just let go. That's why Zazen is equated with enlightenment, because at that time there's nothing else. This is the true form of the self, which is the... You realize that this is the universe. This body land is just a manifestation of nature. It's like a tree growing in the ground. What's after nine?

[71:11]

@Text_v004
@Score_JJ