We're almost at the end of Gensho Koan. Today, I want to start off with the end of section 11. So I'll read section 11. And section 12, because actually, as I say, the divisions are somewhat arbitrary. And I don't want to divide them. So I want to talk about them together. So now if a bird or a fish tries to reach the end of its element before moving in it, this bird or this fish will not find its way or its place. When you find your place where you are, practice occurs.

[01:35]

Actualizing the fundamental point, which is another word for genja koan. When you find your way at this moment, practice occurs. Actualizing the fundamental point. For the place and the way is neither large nor small, neither yours nor others. The place, the way has not carried over from the past. and is not merely arising now. Accordingly, in the practice enlightenment of the Buddha's way, meeting one thing is mastering it. Doing one practice is practicing completely. Here is the place. Here the way unfolds. The boundary of realization is not distinct, for the realization comes forth simultaneously with the mastery of Buddhadharma. Do not suppose that what you realize becomes your knowledge and is grasped by your consciousness.

[02:39]

Although actualized immediately, the inconceivable may not be apparent. Its appearance is beyond your knowledge. When you find your place, where you are, practice occurs. Actualizing Genjo Koan. So that's why we say, or why it's said, Genjo Koan is the koan of our practice, or the koan of our life.

[03:42]

How we find our way, on each moment. And Suzuki Rushdie used to say that our practice is just finding our self moment by moment, living our life little by little. The practice is just living your life little by little in reality. So little by little is moment by moment. And enlightenment occurs moment by moment. When we have the idea of some big experience always, then we compare our usual life to some ideal experience.

[04:50]

And then we say, well, no, I'm not enlightened, or there's no realization here until I have the big experience. It's not that there's no such thing as the big experience. You may or may not have such a thing. But it doesn't mean that life is not unfolding within enlightenment moment after moment. So Genjo Koan is the koan of our life as it unfolds moment by moment in reality. What is the reality of our life as it unfolds moment by moment by moment?

[05:59]

So enlightenment experience should occur moment by moment by moment. And when we understand our life as practice, then our life is actualizing the koan. So this word practice, sometimes we say, what is practice? Practice sounds like playing the piano. If you practice the piano, you'll be able to play the piano. But actually, while you're practicing the piano, you're playing the piano. I'll practice the piano so that I'll be a good pianist. But actually playing all the scales, learning where the fingers go, is already being an accomplished pianist.

[07:18]

If you know how to play A, B, C, D, E, F, G, you've already accomplished the piano. But there's no end. to accomplishment. That's why he says, do not suppose. No. He says, here is the place and here the way unfolds. And the boundary of realization is not distant, for the realization comes forth simultaneously with the mastery of Buddhadharma. The boundary of realization is endless. But within each moment, mastering just one moment's activity is boundless realization.

[08:29]

But we don't experience it. It's beyond our consciousness. It's beyond our conscious ability to realize it, because what we realize is realized through our concepts and our idea. And since our concepts and ideas are limited, we can only know conceptually very little. This is why Einstein was so frustrated. Einstein intuitively understood something, but even such a great mind couldn't conceptualize it.

[09:32]

So we're fortunate to have Zazen, because even though we can't conceptualize it, we can do it. We can be it. Even though you can't see it, you can be it. Mayazumi Roshi puts it a little differently. He says, realizing this place, one's daily life, is the realization of ultimate reality, which is Genjoko. Realizing this way, one's daily life, is the realization of ultimate reality. The place and the way. Place and the way are not different, but place is right here, and the way to go is not some way, some meandering path, but the way to go leads to our footsteps.

[11:05]

Where is the way? It's right under our feet. but we always forget that it's right under our feet. When we enter the zendo to sit zazen, to do sashi, even though we carry our thought and emotion with us, our thought and emotion are secondary to sitting up straight, watching our breath, taking care of our posture. Zazen is the one place where we can let go of our small mind. The small mind which is bothered by things, which complains about things,

[12:12]

has opinions about things. It's the place where we can find unlimited existence, which is not conditioned by thinking or feeling or anything. we can actually go beyond the world of conditions, even though we're right in the midst of the world of conditions. It's not exactly escape from conditions, but it's cutting through conditions. So posture in zazen is not like the posture of our most ordinary activity.

[13:20]

Because in most ordinary activities, our posture is determined by circumstances, determined by the conditions of our life. And when you begin to sit in zazen posture, it seems very extreme. When you give zazen instruction to people and tell them to sit up really straight, they don't believe it. It's too extreme. It's too different. But actually, it's our natural posture. Zazen posture is posture which is beyond or not conditioned by thought and feelings and emotions. It's posture which is free from thought, feeling, and emotions. So we have this opportunity to actually free ourself.

[14:30]

Not escape from, but free, have some freedom from the world of thought, feeling, and emotion. even though thoughts, feelings and emotions are present in zazen. So our effort in zazen is different than our effort when our mind is thoughtless or not concentrated. So in zazen we assume a posture which is not determined by oppression or fear or anxiety or emotional conditions.

[15:37]

We don't assume the posture of the thinker. You know, Rodin's thinker is this. It's not zazen posture. It's great, but it's not zazen posture. Not ponderous. It cuts through ponderousness. It just resumes We just resume our true nature, which is beyond conditions, which is our original face, our original mind, which is a mind called, this mind is called the mind of great enlightenment. Great enlightenment is beyond our understanding and beyond our conceptualization.

[16:45]

We don't have to think about it. We do a little thinking about it because it's hard for us to believe it. So somebody like me has to come up here and explain it. And it's beyond my ability to explain it. So in Zazen, when thoughts come up, we just offer our thought up to Zazen.

[17:53]

When emotion comes up, we just offer our emotion up to Zazen. When feeling comes up, we just offer up feeling to Zazen. We just lay it at the feet of Zazen. Whatever comes up, we just lay it at the feet of Zazen. That's our offering. And Zazen says thank you. And as we lay all this stuff around at the feet of Zazen, it gets turned under and releases the effort, releases the energy which is beyond our effort. Every time we lay down something, something comes forth.

[19:08]

Wisdom comes forth. Prajna comes forth. So thought, emotion, feeling is a kind of haze over Prajna. And when we clear the air, when we just keep laying it down, as an offering, the mind becomes clearer and clearer and prajna arises by itself beyond our ability to bring it forth. So great enlightenment is like this. It's beyond our ability to bring it forth. No matter how much we try to bring it forth, we can't bring it forth.

[20:12]

But when we clear the air, it just comes forth by itself. But you may not recognize it. Because it's beyond our expectation. And it's beyond our ability to conceive of it. If you try to conceive of it, it disappears. because your idea obscures it. So just to be able to sit with calmness of mind, letting whatever comes, come, and letting it go. That's if you let whatever comes come and let it be and let it go, accepting everything, getting bigger and bigger.

[21:26]

You will grow bigger and bigger. If you stay the same size, prajna will not come forth. So, as something comes up, we have to get bigger and bigger in order for it to be there. This is how we give up, actually. So, when we sit, the body sits, Sazen, Mind sits zazen. Breath sits zazen. Painful legs sit zazen all by themselves. We don't have to say, these are my painful legs.

[22:28]

If you say, these are my painful legs, you already made a mistake. There are just some painful legs sitting on a black cushion. There is just some breath. There is just abdomen, an abdomen rising and falling with breath. There is just upright posture. But whose is it?

[23:30]

So on each moment there is the opportunity for great enlightenment. Each moment presents itself as an opportunity for entrance. Just all we have to do is give up. When thought comes, let it come and let it go. That's giving up. When feeling comes, let it come, let it go. That's giving up. When some emotion comes, let it come and let it go. Maybe it comes back, but actually it doesn't come back. Nothing comes back. Nothing will ever come back. You may have another thought that looks like something's coming back, but that's just a new thought.

[25:01]

You may have what you think is a loop in your mind, but those are all new, brand new thoughts. They never happened before. Nothing will ever come back. So everything is new. Nothing ever happened before. It will never happen again. You have this opportunity to experience life as it occurs, brand new, moment after moment, even though it looks like the old life. We say, I came to the Zindo, and then I will go back to my cabin. But that's just a way of speaking. We always are going forward. Going back

[26:19]

to the cabin is a brand new experience of going forward. So in this posture we can experience space and time as they occur simultaneously. very cutting edge of space and time. It's not going forward or backward. It's just being as it is. And each moment has its own history.

[27:39]

So if you say now, you say now anytime. Is it the same now or a different now? Now I'm here, now I'm there. But now is just always now. So we always have an opportunity to enter into now. What is now? So Doge insists to meet one Dharma and penetrate one Dharma.

[28:59]

Just one thing to do. There's only one thing to do. So simple. to meet one thing and complete one thing. You know, in Zen, the Zen teachers don't like to say perfect. They always say something like 80% or 90% or almost perfect, but they never say perfect.

[30:05]

They always say almost perfect, just about perfect. If we say perfect, then you have set up some standard in your mind where you think you have to reach. In this practice, we have to stretch ourselves as far as we can go. We really do have to stretch ourselves as far as we can go. If you don't stretch yourself, you miss it. But the size and shape of each one of us is different. So each one of us has our own almost perfect shape.

[31:10]

But there's no perfect standard. You shouldn't try to stretch into somebody else's shape. You have to find your own shape. We each have to find our own shape. In order to do it, you have to really stretch. And if you do the best you can, then you've found your shape. You may think, oh, I have some... I know what my shape is. That's still an idea. The only way you know what your shape is, is to stretch as far as you can go. Then you know. You may think, well, I haven't quite reached my shape. But maybe when you realize that you stretch as far as you can, you can look back and say, that's my shape.

[32:20]

Perfect. Almost perfect. You can't see yourself. We can't see ourself and do it at the same time. We can't see our realization and do our practice at the same time. The eye can't see itself. So in this practice, we have to put the emphasis on doing rather than on seeing.

[33:59]

And sometimes people say, well, you don't talk about enlightenment. You know, you Soka Zen people don't talk much about enlightenment. That's true. We talk about how to make the cake. Just make the cake. Don't eat it. Don't talk about how tasty cakes are. Just get in there and do the work. You may or may not taste it. But while you're engaged in making the cake, it's just cake all the way through.

[35:08]

So in the course of our practice, we have good feelings. We have bad feelings. We have doubts. You have confidence, but just doing, that's the main thing. If you know how to just do, totally, wholeheartedly and completely, your feet are on the way. And when you understand this, then you have unshakable confidence in the way. So the main thing is how to have unshakable confidence in the way.

[36:12]

If you have that, then nothing can move you. Nothing can push you around. Thoughts, feelings, emotions, doubts, nothing can push you around. So, the purpose of Sashi is to find your immovable center. Calm, immovable center that nothing can shake. Pain, emotions, feelings, anxieties, thoughts, life, death. Nothing can shake it. Nothing can move that. That's our abiding place in Sashim and in our life.

[37:21]

So in Sashim, try and put your energy and effort And just sitting up really straight, finding your balance, letting go, being very still, and accept everything as it is. And don't let anything move you. When you bow, you understand why you're bowing. When you chant the Heart Sutra, you understand why you're chanting the Heart Sutra.

[38:29]

And when you meet things, you have no fear of things. So, during this sashi, it's all of us trying to find our way. Find our way to the very core of our being. Usually, Buddha's enlightenment is celebrated at the end of Rohatsa Sasi.

[39:55]

December 8th is the day that some Buddhists have decided to celebrate Buddha's enlightenment day. In Southeast Asia, they celebrate Buddha's birthday, enlightenment, and Parinirvana all at the same time. So there's really no special day for Buddha's birthday. But since December 8th is Buddha's birthday for us, that's when we try to do it. So usually Sashin starts earlier, since we started the practice period late, where our Sashin is later. But I think it's very nice to celebrate Buddha's birthday at the beginning of Sashin. Because we're already enlightened, we should realize it. Practice starts from enlightenment and goes to enlightenment.

[41:11]

Enlightenment seeks enlightenment. Buddha seeks Buddha. Because there's already enlightenment, we can be enlightened. Because we're already Buddha, we can find ourself as Buddha. So let's establish the fact first and then practice it. It feels like your front is meeting your back.

[43:50]

And then inhaling in through your mouth. Let your lower abdomen expand. And then breathe the air out. Just let it be fast.

[45:02]

If it really is slow, just let it be slow. No need to interfere with it. And just let your mind, let your attention follow the movement of your lower abdomen as you breath. Just let your attention follow.

[46:08]

And I would like you to count your breaths in this way. After you inhale, you count one on the exhale. And after you inhale again, you count two on the exhale. And after you inhale again, you count three on the exhale. And when you get to 10, you start again with 1. If you lose count, just start again with 1. And if you count to 100, just start again with 1. So keep coming back from 1 to 10. And when you count your breath, don't

[47:55]

Think of your breath as being an object. you

[48:34]

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