When you're wondering, Abbott has returned. I don't know exactly how to begin this talk because there's so many different angles with which to enter. Sunday, I went to this, what would I call it, pilgrimage with a Native American, a Native American pilgrim. And I came home yesterday. And last summer I attended the Four Winds Conference at Tassajara as the representative of Tassajara.

[01:16]

And the Four Winds is Tassajara Esalen Institute. the New Kemaldolese, which is a Christian monastery in Big Sur, and the Esalen tribe, which is represented by Little Bear, who has this horse ranch at the bottom of the road to Tassajara. If you've ever gone to Tassajara, you pass the horses on the right and this horse ranch, which is run by the Nason family, who are the Esalen Indians, the original inhabitants for 10,000 years.

[02:22]

So in the past, I don't know how many years, five or six years, once a year they have the meeting of the four winds and they discuss the mountain. It's quite a wide area between Big Sur and Carmel Valley. and between maybe Carmel and the Merced River, maybe King City, that whole area, which encompasses that mountain. that whole area, the Ventana wilderness.

[03:35]

Ventana means window. And so Little Bear, this enormous person, both physically and spiritually, He was born there, but he was sent off to school when he was young. He's only 39. He remembers Suzuki Roshi when he was a little kid, holding his hand and walking with him. He learned the traditional shamanistic spiritual tradition of the Esalen Indians.

[04:38]

So he's kind of like the spiritual leader of the Esalen tribe, which people thought was extinct not too long ago. They thought, well, there are no more Esalen Indians. So there was a kind of land grab and I think it was his grandfather or his uncle who showed up at the Indian Bureau and he said, there are Esalen Indians and I'm one of them. And the Bureau man said, well, you have to prove that. And he said, no, you have to prove I'm not. So they did a lot of research, a lot of research. And they said, yes, it's true. There are Esalen Indians, and there are not too many.

[05:39]

But they exist, and this is their land, and there's a lot of information at Cal about it. So that was conceded. But then four lawyers showed up. I think we should have a DNA test." So he said, okay. So they had a DNA test of a 6,000-year-old skeleton from the area. And as it turns out, not only was the DNA test, did it successfully identify them as Heslin Indians, but identified the chief. The chief's DNA is the same DNA as Little Bear. So that was the end of that.

[06:44]

So I met at the last Four Winds Council. I represented Tassajara and met Little Bear and talked with him. And we had a very good meeting. And he invited me to go on this trip, which he does once a year, to Pine Valley. And you start out at the horse ranch and some people walk and other people ride horses to Pine Valley. And then they have a wonderful kind of spiritual powwow. for three days and then go to Tassajara to end it. So it's kind of a connection between the Esalen Indians and Tassajara. So it's kind of a Zen Indian, a Zen Native American combination which flows really wonderfully.

[07:55]

So I, of course, wanted to ride the horse. And so you spend most of the day riding the horse into Pine Valley, which is, Pine Valley is a very sacred place for the Esalen Indians. And beautiful. But before we left, on the horse range, the horse range extends for 10,000 acres. And he has a roundhouse, and the roundhouse is under the ground. For him, for the Indian people, And for a little bit, the Indian people are the earth people.

[09:05]

And they really are very closely connected with the earth, as we all know. And their spiritual, like their zindo, is underneath, or is under the ground. and then with a big mound with four pillars like this, actually, close together, and then logs going all in to make a round house, and an earthen roof. He said sometimes the horses walk up to the mound and look down through the roof when the people are inside. So we started out in that round, The roundhouse is called, and there's a fire in the middle, beautiful blue smoke going up.

[10:09]

And then everybody says something. They always have a pass around the staff and everybody says something. And this was part of the, every day we would do this, twice a day, actually, passing around staff. So little bears, every day he would open up the circle with gratitude. It seems like the basis of their practice is gratitude and compassion and big heart, taking care of the earth, taking care of people,

[11:36]

And the Indians, the Native Americans, are the most disenfranchised people in America. And yet, no resentment. No resentment. The prophecies of the Esalen Indians The ancient prophecy is that the yellow people, the black people, and the white people would all come to the state of America, and that they would be welcomed by the Native Americans, the red people, which originally happened, but we didn't hold up our part. But that's still there. It's still there. that dream is still alive.

[12:40]

So, on his ranch, the guides for his trip were a Japanese cowboy from Kauai. He said, I met Little Bear 11 years ago and I always wanted to be a cowboy and that's all I've done since then. a black man who is half Jamaican and half English, and a white man who is a wonderful person, and a little bear. So these represent the four races, which for him is the bringing together of the races

[14:07]

So we went to Pine Valley. Some people walked, some people rode. And then the next day, we built the Sweat Lodge. The Sweat Lodge was the center of this trip that Native American fishing lodges built out of wicker, you know, out of, like a big basket upside down and then covered with blankets and covered with plastic and some tarps so that there's no air and no light. Nothing gets in.

[15:14]

There's a little door. And then he built a little mandala in front. And we all poured red sand and white sand and black sand and yellow sand. And then there was a Buddha in the middle. And on the other side of that was where the fire was. You don't make a fire in the sweat lodge. Incidentally, he doesn't call it a sweat. He said, I don't like to call it a sweat. It's a purification action. But you sweat. And so we put these stones on the fire. And then the fire was going a long, long time. And So everything is done in a very ritualistic way.

[16:15]

Everything is a prayer when you walk. Each foot, step. Whatever you do, it's all a prayer in connection with the earth and with the universe. So then, we finally entered the sweat lodge. And then the stones are brought in, one at a time, each stone is brought in. And the stone is totally red all the way through. You can almost see through the stone. And then it's on a kind of little iron claw, with at the end of a pole, somebody puts that in. And then when the stone comes in, everybody says, welcome stone person. Then the stones are piled up, in the middle of the lot, in this hole.

[17:20]

And then the door is closed, and everything is totally black. And then, he throws, well, just a little chanting first, you know. He's always doing some kind of chanting, and I did some chanting, the Shosai Milo Kichijoji Rani. People, some, actually some of his people learned the Shosai Miyake to Gojirani by heart. And they chanted by heart. So, then he throws the water on the stones. And then it starts really heating up. And so, there are different ways of doing this. But he took it easy on us. 15-minute sessions, four 15-minute sessions. You're only in there for 15 minutes. But it's so intense. And then people start letting stuff out.

[18:29]

And each session is different. And people started hugging the ground, because it's so hot. And of course, I sat in Zazen, because I figured that's the best way to accept everything. And it worked. And then, if you have anybody that you want to pray for, And it's all geared toward purification and letting go of... He said, when you go into the sweat lodge, you die and are reborn. You just let go of everything.

[19:37]

You cannot hold on to anything. Everybody breaks down to some extent. And if you're holding anything, you can't stay there very long. You have to let go of it. So it's letting go of things, something stops. And on the third round, well, after each round, fortunately, we have a creek running by, so I'm going to jump in the creek and then come back. And the third round, Just about at the end, it was so intense, you know, that I found myself lying on the grass outside. And I thought, I must have passed out. And they must have hauled me out. And somebody said, you want to come back? And I said, yeah. But I thought that I'd passed out. But then I learned later that I didn't pass out. I just didn't remember. walking out or lying down, any of that.

[20:40]

I just had no memory of it at all. Just like my mind, my body, and it was doing what it had to do, but I had no consciousness. It was just gone. It was interesting. So that was the kind of big highlight. And then they had another sweat the next day, and I thought, I had enough. I said, oh, this would be an easy one, you know, just go ahead and just warm up. I couldn't see how it could be anything else. But then he had people, you know, everybody had to say something, go around, which is tedious, you know, because some people are long-winded and want them to not talk so long. But every time somebody talks, you throw more water on. But it's, you know, it's like sashimi.

[21:41]

very intense and difficult. And you wonder why you're there. Open the door, open the door. But then at the end, if you're really glad that you did it. And then we went back to Tassajara. Yesterday morning, we had an ending ceremony up at Suzuki Roshi's gravesite, which was very nice. And we had a circle, and I included Suzuki Roshi's stone in the circle. I had a little bear standing on one side of the stone, holding it. And I put my hand on the other side, and then everybody was holding hands. So it was very, very intimate, very nice. So that was my adventure. over the last couple of days. And it's still very strongly with me.

[22:50]

Do you have any questions? Yeah? How do they cultivate the heart so strongly? He? He, or is it? It sounds like it's more than a little bear. It sounds like part of their practice. Well, he just, you know, I've never seen anybody as open as he is. Suzuki Roshi was very open, very more Japanese, you know, kind of subtle, where Little Bear just out there. Just everybody is welcome and accepted and part of this. You see, everybody is part of his family. And it's quite wonderful.

[24:03]

I heard that he did, although he was educated by the grandmother who was the shaman, the last living shaman. He didn't want to do this, you know. He really didn't mind when he was in high school and, you know, he just wanted to be a kid, you know. But she kept training him and training him and training him. Finally, he realized that this was his destiny and he just took it on. Yes? How did the people from Esselstyn and the monastery express their... They weren't there. No, it was just, this is a Tassajara Native American trip, this particular one. The Four Winds Conference includes all four. This is not that, this is just these two, because of their close connection between Tassajara

[25:07]

which he wants to keep making closer. And some people kind of resist that a little bit, you know, they don't want to mix things up with their Zen. But I think it's wonderful. Well, ever since I was a little kid, I've always had the same dream.

[26:16]

The same dream of bringing all the races together. And when I think of the profundity of it, it just chokes me up. So that's what I feel.

[27:58]

I can't explain it exactly, more than that, maybe, at this moment. Also, I said that when I was a kid, I used to play Cowboys and Indians. That was our game, Cowboys and Indians. And I always wanted to ride horses with Indians. And I finally got my opportunity. But that's always been my dream, is that to bring all the races together. And the thing I like about, you know, the wonderful thing about Tassajara is that Tassajara is right in the middle of the forest for some wonderful reason.

[29:11]

And all these people sitting Zazen day and night, you know, emanating this wonderful power. actually allowing, helping to rejuvenate the mountain and the indigenous peoples. And the contribution that each one is making to each other, I think it's going to be just wonderful. And when people see the power of the Native Americans, it's really there. It's astonishing. great earthy spirituality has been just squashed, and yet it keeps coming back up, it keeps coming back up.

[30:15]

And it's the thing, the necessary ingredient that we need to complete the circle. and people of different racial or ethnic backgrounds interacted and spoke truth and some truth to each other.

[31:28]

And it sounds to me that you had your own unlearned racism. Yeah, I thought of that. Because I didn't have to unlearn it. So one of the things that we tried to talk about at the end of the workshop was how to bring this back, this wisdom that we're trying to penetrate to our practice here in the Sangha. And I'm wondering if you had any wisdom or anything to share with us. Well, I think that Alan was talking to me about this this morning. The circle is wonderful. And Little Bear talks about circles. Everything is a circle. The veins in your body are circles. And your limbs are circles. Everything is a circle.

[32:31]

Everything is circles within circles within circles. And to have a circle where people can express themselves in different ways for different reasons. I think it's probably something that we could look at doing. It's time-consuming. It's time-consuming. But... One time, just a minute, one time, when we had the Zendo, where the community room is, when we were building this Zendo, I asked everybody what their background was.

[33:31]

I think it was during a lecture. I asked everybody what their background was. It was really interesting to see, you know, what their ancestry was. And to see where all these people come from. We're all the result of some... the history of the human race. And it's so fascinating, you know, to see the different blends and purities and, you know. And at the end of that time, everybody was just really alive and open, you know. So I think it's... I feel that it's really, I really like to know, I'm always, when I look at people, I think, Irish, you know, or maybe a little, I'm always doing this, putting the pieces together of the combinations, and I just do that every time I see somebody, I wonder about their ancestry.

[34:42]

It's just so fascinating. And I think to bring this out and to accept it, to accept where everybody's from and to honor where everybody's from is the beginning of bringing everything together in a very conscious way. So that's my thought. Thank you for sharing your childhood dream. One of the things that the trainers in our online racism workshop talked about was how all children actually resist racism. That we as children all see the unfairness of it or the hypocrisy of it, sort of realize that this thing that's in the air and in the drinking water doesn't make sense and it's so hurtful.

[35:43]

And one of the things we did was everyone tried to remember their own acts of resistance to that. So it's pretty universal, I think. I wanted to say something about circles. I was able to go to this Women in Buddhism conference two weekends ago at the Claremont Colleges, where lots of women came from Asia and all over North America to meet together. And it was a really interesting thing about circles there, a lecture by the relatively new Abbess of the Zen Center of Los Angeles, and her name isn't coming to me now. Her name's Wendy Egyoku? Egyoku. Right, thank you. And she talked about how, well she was a student of Mayuzumi Roshi, and then after he died she went away, but she was asked to come back after a sexual scandal there, and so one of the things she did when she undertook this task

[36:46]

thinking of purifying the Sangha from all of this, is that she refused at first to do Dokusan, but instead she had everyone sit in a circle, and she also had a talking piece, a string of beads, or a stick or something, to air it all. She said she didn't want to hear it one by one, everybody telling everything, and they still have continued this, although she gives Dokusan now. they meet in different types of circle once a month or something and speak together. And she was talking about the ancient method of sitting in circle, sitting in council all over the world. I just want to say one more thing, and that is that there was a young guy there who, he was about 23 and he was a musician and he was from Hollywood And he had all the stuff with him, you know, sullen and defensive and hip and, you know.

[37:56]

And Little Bear and some of the other teachers were, you know, talking to him and helping him. And by the time he went through the sweat lodge, And everybody kind of, you know, this great feeling of love that was there. He was totally transformed. Innocent, happy, sweet guy. And he says, the problem with the kids today is that the reason they act the way they do is because they're scared. They're just scared. And so they act out in all these ways. Yeah. Are you done? I am finished. Okay. Well, several years ago I did a vision quest in the desert.

[39:08]

And the whole thing is, it takes about a month of, you know, The quest is three days, and you're just there by yourself. I mean, you can walk around, but there's nobody else anywhere. For miles. I mean, they are, but you can't see them. And there's some reading and some teaching beforehand. But what I got of this open heart, what I understood from that, or how I got that was Being so intimately connected to the earth, you realize how small you are, and how all of this doesn't matter so much. And I think it's difficult in a way, because we're here, we're living in the city, we're walking on concrete. And my question always is, how can we do that here while we're in the city? Because I have this feeling, I need to go to Tuscara, or I need to go camping, or be in the mountains,

[40:10]

here in this city. Well, yeah, because it's all covered up with concrete. Right. So it's hard to feel part of the sacred when, well, I guess everything is part of the sacred, but it doesn't... Well, I think that if you feel that way, it's with you. You know, you... I don't know. I don't know. You know, Dogen says, the best place to practice is in the mountains, right? Of course, there's people who always come to the mountains to do their spiritual practice, but to do your spiritual practice in the city is really important, because it's easier to do it in the mountains, and it's much harder to do it in the city. Much harder to do it in the city. You're busy, you have cars, cement, rent, telephones, all that stuff.

[41:18]

This is the big koan. How do you do this in the midst of all the problems? That's our practice. So the main thing is, I think, to see everyone as Buddha and treat everyone as Buddha. If you do that, it doesn't matter where you are. But you have to keep that in your heart all the time. In the city here, I rarely get to the country and I love to be out there, but I was just thinking it's the fauna and the flora outdoors in nature, but here it's mostly fauna. You can sharpen yourself on mostly human fauna.

[42:24]

So if I can remember that, that each person, I have to relate to each person, and that can be such a wonderful experience or a lesson. Even though the sky looks different in different places where you are, the same sky covers the whole earth. And you can see the morning star from most places. You know, in the sweat lodge, people get down on the ground and move So I find some little cool spot to do it. I really appreciate that so much. I have to say I'm so glad you chose this to talk about because Austin and I were down in Tassajara when they had that four winds.

[43:35]

I remember him sitting in his stone chair, you know, outside Zendo. Normally, you can get six little kids in this chair, and he takes up the whole chair. And this enormous man, just sitting there, feeling like he was at home. And I realized, you know, he was Little Bear, and he was, you know, Native American. But that's about, you know, all I was hearing. his wife and son and daughter were there. And Austin was having a blast with them, but I remember thinking, who is this rather crude woman with these very, you know, outgoing, almost, you know, obnoxious kids, feeling like they own this place, you know, just right at home. And then I heard that they had a ranch, and I thought, well, you know, it's just left with all these questions, and I'm so glad that you've Talked about it.

[44:39]

It's helping me to put it in perspective.

[44:42]

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