So today I'll talk a little bit about yesterday's adventures. It's rather unusual for us to not only do another whole activity in the middle of sushin, but for some of us to stay and some of us to go. So with the intention of whatever we do, we're still carrying the feeling of sushin. I don't think we did that, particularly, on the march.

[01:04]

To some extent, we did. We pretty much stayed together. And when we arrived at—well, first of all, on the train, the conductor said, oh, the platform is full. We can't stop here, so we had to go to the next stop. But it was empty. And he apologized. Anyway, so we walked back to the plaza, and we said Zazen, and that was nice. Everybody was very much in Zazen mode at that time. And we ate our lunch, and there was a big rally, and people were giving talks, and Alan gave a nice talk. I went to the bathroom. For 200,000 people, there were about 10 porta-potties. The line started in infinity.

[02:13]

I was surprised that people were actually standing in that line. You had to do that before drinking or eating. Anyway. I realized something which I think about a lot. We carry a number of things around with us, you know. We carry our thoughts and we carry our feelings and emotions, but we also carry stuff in our body like material things and water. We have these water bags. And 200,000 people walking with these water bags down the street, which have to be emptied. I think about this a lot. everyone gets up, it's between five and eight, or five, you know, seven, something like that, most people, and there's this huge flush, you know, the water supply goes whoo, all of a sudden.

[03:26]

But, you know, somehow we've managed to make it work. And then where does that all go? It's a really good question. There's the recycling plant, you know, but then what, you know? I know that there are answers to this but it's an interesting thing, phenomenon. So we kept our Sashin mind pretty much during that time. I went to a bathroom in a building which had only a very short line and then on the way back I heard It's a familiar voice talking. And I walked in front of the podium and there was Alan. I said, that's Alan's voice coming from someplace. So I heard pretty much the last part of Alan's talk. And it was a very nice talk. All the other people were being very ebullient, the other speakers, and I'm trying to rouse passions.

[04:32]

And Alan's talk was very kind of more low-key and talking about how to take into account that we're dealing with human beings wherever we are and the people that we are countering, whose ideas we're countering, are actually human beings and we should be thinking about how to take care of them as well. So I thought it was a very well-placed talk and added a nice tone. So then the march, we went on the march. There were other Buddhists there too, the Buddhist Peace Fellowship and the Vipassana people and Tibetans and so forth, and we were walking down Marcus Street. It's like a river, the river of humanity or the river of life actually. And I felt each one of us, you know, is going down this river together and we're in different spaces, you know, and sometimes we meet and sometimes we're apart and sometimes we're ahead and sometimes we're behind.

[05:49]

And sometimes we're, some gregarious types were talking to each other all the time and the more quiet types were less talkative. I felt though that because there was so much going on, so much, you know, excitement and high feeling, that for the most part, people got into talking and having conversations. which I feel was pretty natural. And so I feel in that sense, we didn't really take care of our zazen mind. But all in all, I felt that we went through that whole process, and then came back and said zazen, continued zazen.

[06:57]

which was a little, it wasn't hard to get back in Sishin, but because walking so slowly, it's very hard on your knees. You know, if you just walked from the ferry building down to the 10th street, no big deal, but walking so slowly and with so much restraint, it's very hard, it's like walking downhill or something, you know, taking little steps. It's a little bit hard to come back and say that again, but it took a little while to get back into it. But all in all I feel that as we came back we became collected and there was a sense of collectiveness when we were marching, when we were walking because we tried to stay together and even though we were talking and so forth I think there was still a feeling of through it all. So it's kind of like how you take your practice into daily life and with all the hubbub of daily life and all the activities that we go through and still come back and here we are right back into

[08:19]

And yet, simple. And I thought we behaved ourselves very well, all in all. And it was very exciting in many ways. There were some wonderful banners and people playing music. This bagpiper came up behind us. Every time I hear a bagpipe, it just brings tears to my eyes. I just get this emotional charge from a bagpipe. It just, you know, sends shimmers up my spine. Bagpipes, you know, are not only just peculiar to the British Isles. The Scots and the Irish, they're worldwide and it's interesting that all over the world bagpipes came into existence and this kind of strange instrument that would be invented in so many different parts of the world because it's a sheep's stomach sewn into a bag and then you fill the bag with air

[09:45]

and squeeze it under your arm and then play the chanter. It's really a complex thing. So all kinds of pipes like that are always, I think they're just wonderful, very emotional. And then with a little family. The father was playing the snare drums, the mother was doing something with maracas or something, and the two daughters were doing a little dance. It was just so sweet, you know, it's like unbelievable. And then there was a group of brass band This brass band, all the players all facing each other with drums and everything in there, blasting away.

[10:50]

It was just really thrilling. So there was a lot of stuff going on. I think there was more interesting things. There were two guys, tall men dressed in black suits with blood all over their faces, you know, and sticking out of their pockets were oil-soaked dollar bills. And as we went by they would make remarks to people like, what are you doing here? Why don't you go home? How come you're not here? And Alan and I walked by and he looked at Alan and he said, you've got your robes on. He says, you could be home meditating. And then the people here were seven people.

[11:50]

It was just like this very intimate little group. Everybody was doing sashimi, and one person served meals. And when you get into a situation like that, everybody counts. Because there's so few people, and each person has a responsibility to really make things work. So everything seemed to work very well. And they didn't miss us at all. No, they did miss us. They missed each other. Also, then, the thought is like, what do we do when we're doing this? What's the difference between sitting here doing sashin and doing the peace walk?

[12:58]

In a sense, it's really, is it the same or different? We could have all just stayed here and done a session for peace. I think the only difference is that we wanted to be counted. The police said there were 100,000. activists said there were 200,000 or more, 250, or maybe there's 150,000. Yeah, 250,000. So to just add your body to the count, mainly, that's what I, my feeling. And So, but sitting Zazen, sitting Sushin for the same purpose which is no particular purpose.

[14:12]

I don't feel we were doing this for a, I felt there was a purpose but not for a result. I think that there is a result. And I think that the Europeans are very encouraged by Peace March. It's true. Germany, France, and some of those other countries, China, Russia, what other little country? Belgium. And we're very encouraged, actually, by our peace marches and so that's a positive result because not just our peace march here but all around the world you know on Saturday there was something like seven million people all around the world who turned out for peace march and but nobody knows exactly how

[15:32]

But Australia and Rome had the biggest with 700—no, 2 million or something. I think Germany and Rome were the two largest with a million and 750,000. Yeah, a million and 750,000. Yeah. And England, too. Poor Tony Blair. He's the only one that's won the war in England. So that's very encouraging. It's a real groundswell, not just San Francisco. But I think that San Francisco kind of leads the way in America. But just to do it, just to do it. you know to do it in order to make an expression to express our descent is enough and then whatever comes out of that will come out of it but without being attached to any result which is the same as sitting zazen.

[16:58]

We sit zazen as an expression of our true nature without expecting any result. So I think Zazen and walking for peace is the same in that the purpose is not to gain something but to give up something. In Zazen we give up, we let go of everything. and simply exist with everything. And in this peace walk we give up, this is a way of letting go of self. It's a selfless act and it's a selfless expression which is how we

[18:00]

share ourselves with the world. So at the same time that it's expressing that reality, it's also a message. So I think that people sitting Zazen are expressing that message, whether they're sitting here or sitting in the plaza. So that's what I feel about it. I'd like to hear what other people's observations were either for here or there. Well, I was really glad that people were going and just the sign that Greg made, I was just glad Berkley Zen Center was doing this. And we did have a fun little lunch in the Zen Dojo with the rest of us.

[19:11]

But it would have felt nice for me if we could have done some little leap-taking ceremony so that we kind of felt like we were still a part of it. And people kind of were chatting over there, and we were kind of doing kin-hin, but I mean, it was a little bit frayed there from It just would have been nice to accompany you to the gate and bow you out and just do something. Yeah, that's absolutely right. I mean, if we do something like this again. Next time. Yeah. Good idea. I'm really glad that Greg's scientific. He made it really easy to find him. I am. A couple of y'all know that's it. I haven't gone to any really big marches because everybody's yelling and screaming and everything. It was, it was sort of part of my practice to go to this march and it actually, it sort of was, it had an outcome expected and I'm really glad I wasn't really committed to it because the outcome that I got was a lot better.

[20:28]

It was, it was delightful to go with a group of people that were being quiet. And when we were walking in this river down the middle of Market Street, it was like a river. Sometimes you'd get caught in it and you'd sort of move, and other times you'd sort of not move. And what I noticed a couple times when we were walking, And it sort of felt like being here only it didn't hurt my legs as much. Because there would be that sort of, I don't know, silence or something right in the middle of this, all these buildings that were really tall and the blue sky up there and then people would do this big cheer and it's sort of like it would start at the

[21:32]

front of the pack, you know, 12 miles up the road and it would move down and it was just, it was sort of like a, I don't know, like a worm moving, you know, little parts of their body and the whole thing's all connected. It was, it turned out to be really, really great and I, it really helped to set a different tone for me for the, the Sashin and it sort of brought the spirit of it back for me and it was really delightful walking next to you down the middle of Market Street just being quiet and everyone was great. It was a very cohesive group. I felt like I was part of something bigger than myself within this group and then something even bigger than the whole street.

[22:34]

Well, it was a really interesting experience and really powerful. I'm still kind of processing it. I went over a little early, and I went back, we got kind of separated at the end, because it was pretty chaotic at the Siddhi Center, really chaotic, and the BPF group was not actually where they said they were going to be. So on both ends I was traveling by myself, and then I was in zazen mode, you know, I was quiet and contained, and then I gave these these short talks, one at the Civic Center for the Interfaith Service, and that was very nice and peaceful, and with these different clergy, and it was very encouraging that there was another Buddhist. Sylvia Borstein was there, and it was nice for us to see each other, and she was saying she is leading a retreat, a month-long retreat at Spirit Rock, and

[23:42]

They were all sitting at Spirit Rock and they gave her, let's go and speak there. So, you know, and then going down to the other end where, to speak to the Valley before it started the marches, I was nervous. You know, I just thought, I had this thing all written. Am I really going to say this? It was so not in the grain of what was being said for the most part on that stage. But I decided, well, I was asked to do this. I'm just going to do it. This is what I actually think. And not to make, not to get into that voice that kind of thundering voice that's cultivated by these speakers.

[24:47]

So I did that and it was one woman, I don't know who she was right there, it's like every point I reached it, yes! And then I look and I saw Rick, what's his name, who was carrying the sign? Rick Wallace. I could see him and so there was like another face to kind of key on. But the nicest part of the day, And I confess this was not, it was not Zazen-like. But what it was, I just felt really opened because we had been sitting Zazen. So to be in this river and to be doing this with Sangha friends, that was the best part of the day. to me, you know, and it didn't matter what was talking, not talking, just like to be there together, in this river together, it felt really great and I just felt this kind of willing affection for all of us who were there and for the people who were staying behind here and that kind of affection spread to

[26:02]

various people we were encountering. It's been a long time since I was in a big piece margin. My point of reference is the 60s. I was so glad that there was music and humor and diversity of almost every kind. There was very times my eyes were tearing up. I just think it was great that we had this opportunity to do this together. And that blessing was given to both activities, to the activity here, which seems really important, and people just sustaining it, and that we could come back from that container and just move in. So, thank you. Eric?

[27:11]

Well, I was struck by sort of the tension zone between our unity with those who disagree with and our opposition to them. Back in the mid-80s, when I was in my small way co-organizing the marches for peace, jobs, and justice, as people might remember, for that era of the Central American Wars. At that point, you know, it was relatively new, it was in practice, and my feeling of us versus them, you know, ah, bastards. Yeah, we're gonna show you, we're gonna, you know, we're gonna win. We're right, and you're not. Now I notice that 17 years later. These are the biggest marches I've seen since then, virtually. You know, because in 86 and 87 there was 100,000 people on the streets.

[28:13]

There haven't been too many issues that have brought that many people onto the streets in San Francisco since then. But yesterday I was feeling much more keenly that zone between reading very clever and creative slogans and manners. Like, somewhere in Texas, there's a village missing an idiot. And then, the empty warheads, where you've got Dick Cheney and Colin Powell. Of course, here at the Zen Center, we like empty heads. Not those kind of empty heads. necessarily, but really feeling the humor of that, but also kind of wondering, well, if they were to see these, how much of this could they take? When would we lose contact with them and really have them feeling like we were their enemy?

[29:22]

Ben, there's no easy answer to that, at least not for me. but uh and i still appreciate that humor definitely but i was uh yeah pondering that um i just had a couple short things to say first of all i was really grateful to whoever organized the sign-up sheet to just sort of plan that we could do this because i very early on realized that the weekend sashin and the the march were going to conflict, and I was sort of having torn allegiances over that. So I appreciate that. And I'd also like to say I appreciate Raoul handling this rather unusual sashim in this unflappable way. I think it's probably been challenging. But the two short comments I want to make were, one, I really felt like we did kind of carry the sashim with us in the march.

[30:22]

I certainly ended up getting into conversations with a couple people, but I felt a lot more mindful doing that than I know I would have otherwise. So I think the atmosphere in the group was pretty strong. And the one last thing I wanted to say was that I once read a book about the civil rights movement, actually, in the 60s. It was trying to explain, well, why did the civil rights movement happen when it did, and how did it happen, and why did it happen, et cetera. One of the major points in this book was that the black churches were very crucial to providing kind of a community within which people could organize to build this big movement. And just what I hear people saying today is that having this community gives people kind of a way to feel empowered and feel comfortable participating in this wider movement that otherwise might feel sort of very impersonal and alienating.

[31:37]

I mean, potentially even kind of alienating, just being this very small element in something much bigger. So to have this community that people feel very comfortable with, I think it's a good good message to take that we should try to organize in groups like this? Well, I definitely felt really good that we had the group and that, you know, we were together and sometimes we were a little lost, but then there was always the sign, you know. And the last march, I went by myself and it just felt totally different, you know, to just be there by myself. and this time to be there with everybody, it just felt really connected. And yes, it was, this machine was carried with us, you know, given, even given all of the, you know, given that, I think we did a great job of holding it together. Yeah.

[32:37]

I was struck by the contrast when we marched in the early 70s. It was mostly young people, mostly long-haired, and a few older people tended to be the college professors. And there was really a sense of government, business, middle-class America, and the hippies and neo-hippies. And with this movement, it's everybody, older, and middle, and young, and children. If I saw one couple, they must have been in there. There was one ex-marine who had his jacket, which was a little bit small for him. He had all these medals, you know.

[33:42]

He's this guy that's been through all this stuff and actually received all this. a lot of honors for his wartime efforts and here he is walking in that march and I thought that's the more of those guys the better and I've always thought about marches that everybody should dress up in suits and ties and carry briefcases that would really make an impression you know I wanted to make a sign. I thought of a sign that said, all men for peace. Executives for peace. Corporations for peace. I'm going to do that next time. Put on my suit, put on my tie, my briefcase, my sign. A few comments. One thing that that I experienced, I'm grateful for the, first of all, I too am grateful for the way that Sashi English set up and also the sign was very helpful, like in finding people, like if one had to depart for a while.

[34:54]

But I felt like when we were coming back on board, I felt like I was coming home. And that felt good. So that was a very nice feeling. And then when we got down to Justin Herman's path when various Buddhists were sitting, it really felt like a great big Buddha feel to me. And I was on the edge of the tarpaulin, and I don't know if other people saw, there were people sitting on the cement, like people would sort of come around us, you know, like people who wanted some reflective time. And that was so very touching too. And the other thing that I want to say is that I was by myself in an earlier march this year too and it is a remarkably different experience. I think the stories that everyone brings back are so interesting because I think they show the richness and the diversity of this movement and we're not seeing it in the media.

[36:05]

And I think it's very, our stories are all very important. Like, apparently one of the neighbors wondered if Charlie and I had gone to the Peace March. And so Charlie said, well, we brought you to go. And this neighbor was gratified that someone on our part of the block had been there. So people are very interested, and I, you know, it has some energy. And another thing that I thought was very interesting is like every time there's a march, they seem to have different flavors. And this was sort of like the duct tape march. There's some interesting theater going on and people are being very creative with plastic sheeting and duct tape. And I'm grateful for the people who were here maintaining this machine and receiving us back.

[37:06]

It's interesting that now, you know, Bush is saying, oh, don't worry, you know, you don't have to worry so much about this alert, you know. Oh, they changed it to yellow. Yeah, they changed it way down, yeah. All these guys, pundits, are saying, you know, it's okay, you know, don't get excited. So they're changing their tone, their tune. Is that because everybody's got their duct tape? We all have duct tape now, so. To lower the alert. Well, I was at two of the marches. First one, I went with my husband to a son and their family, so there were six of us.

[38:18]

My nine-year-old son, who is quite a good artist and knows how to use makeup. things on the internet thing and do heavy pictures and beautiful colors and things. He's nine. He made 70 placards in different colors and some of them with posts and things. He gave a lot of them away. When we were traveling through, we'd see, you know, some kid up there who climbed up the telephone pole and was waving our nine-year-old kid's sign, which really sort of moved us. And then we didn't know that the rest of our family, all in groups, were going to the March 2 and this March, yesterday's March 3. And we didn't know that they were all going to be out there. And so it was a different little kind of feeling when you're sitting there

[39:24]

you know, trying to do zazen and then you're sliding down the hill a little and then all of a sudden these kids, you know, that you've mothered and fathered are wailing to us, dancing up and down and we're trying to be good and, you know, be a little still. But it was really wonderful to see it twice and have this feeling of being part of it. But then the other thing that just really brought tears to my eyes. We were walking along and it was in one of those quiet spills, you know, and there wasn't... and there were three men with bamboo, the long bamboo flutes. Shakuhachi. Shakuhachi. Yeah, and it was just three slightly different tones and it was very quiet. They were playing and it was... Yeah, that was impressive. Here we practiced deeply and realized that the center was really empty.

[40:32]

The intimacy with which the latter morning and lunch and early afternoon went, who convinced me that practice perseveres no matter how many people show up, as long as the heart is there to bring it forward. As you said, knowing there's few people, everyone is important. And I think there's a tendency in community to defer to other people letting other people do it, do more of it. So few, we can look around, but you can't hide behind anybody.

[41:46]

It's like now it's incumbent upon us to just make it happen, bring it forward even more so because we have to dig deep to find the spirit and that's actually what happens. It was a really kind of buoyant I'll also change it for peace. Yeah. Of course, a different way is actually of an actual expression and all that. It's a very different feeling here. But I was reflecting on something I asked Rahul before the march about that they were neutral about going. They could go or they could stay here. They weren't quite sure. said, well, you can sit here and march, or you can go to the march and sit.

[42:56]

I mean, it seems like when all is said and done, what people have expressed here, that that's exactly what happened. And we all found a place to express ourselves. And the permeability and the practice of bringing out to the world and bringing it into the gate really But what you said about, you know, they're doing it and I'm joining, you know, when we come to the Zen Do, often it looks like, well they're doing it and I'm going to join what they're doing, but actually when you come to the Zen Do, every single person is creating the practice. It's not like they're doing something and I'm joining the practice. When you come, you are creating the practice as much as anybody and so there's no hiding behind, you know.

[44:00]

Each one of us has to be out there independently making the practice work and everyone does and when you don't feel that way, it's kind of like you're being pulled along, you know, but at some point and you realize that you actually make the practice happen. take care of Sashane while people went to the march, and we all sat over on this side for lunch, and Anne Greenwater served the whole lunch by herself. She ate with us too, so she was hopping off the tongue and running to the back, and then she would serve, and then she would hop back up on the tongue and eat some more, and I would bow, and she would follow. It was incredible. And then Kelly, for work, We had dishes, you know, after the meal. So Kelly, who cooked the meals, did the dishes.

[45:03]

And I rostered the cheating, and I did the zendo, and Judd did the bathrooms. And Raul was taking care of Sashin, and it was just wonderfully... There was nothing... I mean, there was no one else to do the dishes, so Kelly had to do the dishes. There was no saying no or resisting or anything. You just had to do the next thing anyway. It was wonderful to be here. I wish I was up for the march, but I wasn't. I'm glad we did this. I think it was actually Bibi's idea. We were kind of brainstorming about it in practice and then she made the suggestion. It's good to have to do things where you don't have enough people to do the things that we usually do. When we first started Tassajara, for a long time, the cooks served, which were also the servers.

[46:10]

We didn't have separate servers. The cooks did the serving and the cooking, and then they served the meals. Then they had their own meal afterward. For a long time, the Doan, did the bells, the mokugyo, and muskokyo all at the same time. So because we're used to a certain way of doing things, we get kind of stuck in that way and think that's the way it has to be done. But it's really good to have all that gone and just have to improvise or just do things in a way that you have to think of different ways to do it. which are okay. You know, sometimes if someone starts a Zen Do, and they're used to doing things the way Zen Center does, then when they say they think they have to have a Do on, they think they have to have a Kokyo on, they have to have all these different bells and whistles, yes.

[47:22]

But actually, when you start something new, you do all the work yourself. Then little by little, people help you and then you discover how you disseminate doing things. And then you end up with a Zen center where you have rules and regulations. But it's nice when it's just small. And I remember when I first started the Zen Do, I did the cooking and I did the Doma and I did everything all by myself. And then little by little other people started doing it, you know. But it was very nice. People remember that time and say, that was the nicest time. In the living room, you know. My dog was there. Somebody sat down. My dog was black and used to sit. This little dog. Sitting between his apples.

[48:24]

Somebody sat down on the dog one time. When you have a certain population of people practicing and you begin to have all these positions, then it feels like there's a structure that's apart from the individuals. It's easy to get it, and in this society, it's really easy to get it. you don't recognize how you're creating it. It's just like being in a band also. Who's keeping the time? Oh, it's the drummer. No, it's not the drummer. It's everybody. Every single person. And if each person isn't independently able to sustain it, then actually it doesn't work right.

[49:25]

But it's hard because it's a tension once we create structures and we have these practice committee meetings, we get really lost in an endless discussion of a small detail, where it feels like, well, we've got to figure out this structure, but we have to recognize that tension. Right. It's the difference between the family and the society. So you start out as a family, but you become a society, and then you have to have rules and procedures, and that's good too. Both is good. It's all good. But it's rude, isn't it? The family model is the model that flows. Well, that should still always remain at the heart, no matter how big it gets. Once you lose that quality, then you have bureaucracy. So we don't want to get into bureaucracy.

[50:25]

And it's easy to do once you get big. Anyway, it's time.

[50:33]

@Text_v004
@Score_JJ