I vow to praise the truth of God to tell the truth. Good evening. Recently, I've had several, but my board can't remember. This is Scottish. This is the third and final day for Sashim. Everything that Discomfort, pain, joy, obsession.

[01:19]

I'm really enjoying it. [...] to make, to help us realize that through all this, we just sit. After five or seven days, it becomes more painful. And then the whole region comes up and says, why am I doing this?

[02:35]

And it says, What am I doing? What am I doing? Why am I doing this? And even through that, it would just sit. So... My correct understanding of Sushi is... No matter what happens, we just sit. And when we sit, many things will happen. But moment to moment, we just live our life. Just sitting. We may say, what's the goal? What's the purpose? And where do we get to? is the usual kind of question.

[03:42]

But in Sushi, in Zazu, we just get to this moment. It's not so hard to have some destination up there. And some war up there. But the hardest place to get to in this world is right here. The hardest place to be is right here. That's what makes Sashin so difficult. It's not so difficult because of the pain in our legs or the problem of our mind. But it's just difficult to be here, right here. I mean they have to move.

[04:50]

We're not wishing for something. We're not wanting to be as simple as us. We're not wanting to change our conditions. We're not saying this is greater than the right one. Pure existence is very difficult. to talk a little bit about serving and mindfulness. Sometimes we can screw mindfulness with being careful with being very slow. In order to be careful and mindful, we should do things very slowly, which is not a bad idea.

[05:56]

When you learn to drive a car, you know, people are really slow. You know, pay attention to the right now, where you drive the place, you know. But once you get used to gardening, then you take it to that ceiling. You know, you can sit back and have a mindful, mindful ease. So, when you first learn how to serve, be very careful, and we go very slow. But soon, we should develop a kind of mindful ease. And if we go too slow, then people feel tedious. We set up a kind of tedious feeling, remember? and things are going very slowly.

[07:04]

I imagine everyone sitting on that wall in public fireworks. And if we go too fast, we set up anxiety. We'll look at the numbers that they're going to be ready and kind of observing. And we start dropping things and we tend to disrupt our mood. So having a pace that's consistent, it fits in, and it's going in the window. So it's nice to move briskly, actually, when you're serving, to move briskly, but not serve very deep. Some people serve real, very deep, and drop stuff out of their wall, This is an extreme example.

[08:05]

Here, I don't want to tell you about it. I'm going to read very slowly and consciously. So you take a little bit out of your sleep. And it makes you feel greedy. Because you say, well, please give me some more. Five, six. please stop it and put it in here to read it. Even though the bell is totally in the field. So please don't make me feel greedy. Maybe one big spoon, and then when it's smaller for a second, it's good. Sometimes people serve one small and then you say, oh, please give me some more spoon, sort of big bigger. So Maybe one nicely slides in, and then a small one gives an opportunity to say how much you want.

[09:11]

So, mindfulness doesn't necessarily mean slowness. This thing goes in because what the servers are doing creates the atmosphere in the city and the servers are the moving factor. and creating the atmosphere, creating emotion. So, please keep us awake. If it's too slow, we're going to start nodding. Easy, it's not coming in the city. The feeling is endless, it starts knocking. In Zazen, in a Zendo, you know, we really want to have a vigorous feeling all the time, even though we're just sitting there. You're in Zazen, you're just sitting there. But there should be a vigorous feeling in Zendo.

[10:13]

If everyone is sitting and being straight and putting effort into a question, then there's a vigorous feeling in Zendo, you know, strength. is transmitted all the way around. But you're just kind of, you know, getting through. You're not putting effort into our posture, and your feeling is quiet, but it doesn't feel rigorous. So, one of the problems, potential problems, in this kind of activity is that we lose vitality. Concentration is really good, but concentration is not vitality, I mean without effort, it loses vitality.

[11:20]

So we should keep our effort up all the time, as long as And if you sit Satsashi, if you sit all day with a really good, strong effort in your posture, at the end of the day, even when your lips are, you'll feel quite refreshed. If you put your effort, your mental effort, into posture, then the thoughts you have will not become so important. Will not dominate so easily. Don't put effort in thinking mind. The thoughts between your mind easily dominate me. So don't try to get rid of thoughts. You can't get rid of your thinking. You try very hard. You may be able to stop your thought from sneak up on you very quickly.

[12:21]

So you can't ignore it. And you can't get rid of it. thinking mind is a big point is that you can't ignore it and you can't ignore it. So we just keep returning our attention to posture and breathing and that's where our monoton thinking factor comes in. Thought becomes posture and breathing. I think the father doesn't kind of letting the money carry away by some other thought.

[13:26]

And this is how the main present. So the hardest thing to do is just the main present. And other students would just be here to do it. So we have to continue and make the effort more by minute. So one minute, one minute, the next minute will be it. And the next minute will be it. And the next minute will be it. I'm not judging. When I'm gone, it's bad. When I'm good, it's good. If you judge when I'm gone, it's bad. When I'm here, it's good. Then you're just telling me to do it. When I'm gone, I'm gone. When I'm here, I'm here. That's all. You don't need to take it any further than you.

[14:27]

So we take out of the land of good and bad. One moment of being lost is just a moment of being lost. A moment of being found is just a moment of being done. But our effort is to connect being say it's pretty bad. A mistake is just a mistake. We need to turn you into a small mistake.

[15:33]

So we didn't punish ourselves for each other. We just keep turning back to clarity. It's hard enough just to keep coming up to 30. If you fall into judgment, then the Trump plan will hit the I stayed at the temple, Ken Inji, for about two years.

[17:21]

In this section, Dogen talks about, he gives us an example of someone who is tensile, but doesn't understand what it means to have this position. So it looks like he's criticizing somebody, but he's doing it as an example. He says, they have the office of things of, but in Maine, Emily. And the reason why is because, according to Douglass, up until that time, people didn't understand that practice was tied up with everyday activities of life. So cooking for people was just a little bit of work. He doesn't consider it anything more than just an ordinary activity.

[18:24]

He says, they had the office of Tenzo by name only. There was no one who actually carried out the functions of the office. Since no one clearly saw that the work of the Tenzo itself is the activity of the Buddha, it should not be surprising that there was no one capable of functioning with conviction through this office. Despite the fact that he had had the good fortune to succeed in the office of Tenzo, since he had never encountered a living example of a Tenzo functioning as a Buddha, he was only wasting his time, carelessly breaking his standards of practice. It was a truly pathetic situation, but closely observed the man who was appointed to the office of Tenzo. He never even helped prepare the meals, but entrusted all their work to some absent-minded, insensitive servant. while he never knew our neighbors. He never once even checked to see if the work was being bankrupt. It was as if he thought that watching carefully to see how the rice and vegetables were baked to him was somehow rude or shameful when playing into the private room of the women living next door.

[19:31]

He spent his time in his room, lying around and jamming with someone, while he busied himself reading the chanting sutras. I never saw him once approach a park much less make any effort to obtain the necessary supplies, or think at all about the overall menu of the table. He did not know that taking care of these meals is itself a good practice. Nor apparently did the practice of putting on his quesad, as well, and bowing nine times prior to serving each meal, that would have hurted him, not even in a dream. And as he himself was not aware of these things, he was hardly in a position to go around teaching the normal monks. Even though officially that made his duty, it was a pathetic and sad state of affairs. Though a person might be fortunate enough to be appointed to the office of Tenzo, if that person asks the aspiration to walk away, that person may return empty-handed in the management of goodness and the motion of virtue. Yet though a person may not have awakened the spirit of the Bodhisattva within themselves, if that person encounters someone who has done so,

[20:39]

it would be possible for that person to practice the way of life of the Buddha. Or even if one does not encounter an awakened teacher, if one has a deep aspiration to live this incomparable way of life, surely that one will become familiar with the practice of such a way. However, if both these conditions are likely, target anyone possibly functioning in the way of life of a Buddha. In all the many monasteries located on the virtuous mountains, on the various mountains I have visited in Song of China, the monks holding their respective offices worked in the capacity for one day at a time, yet they always maintained and exhibited the same attitude as the head of the community, applying the attitude appropriately to the time and circumstances. In the monasteries, practices to rotate people,

[21:44]

at the greatest position. And that way, from each position, you learn how to practice. If you're a tensor, then you relate to the practice from everyone in that position. And if you're the director, you relate to everyone and you practice from that point of that position. So, whatever position gives you a vehicle for finding your nature and relating to the community. So it goes both ways. One is that you actualize your own practice and the other is that you're serving the community and relating to the community in that position. And as I said before, each one of us That's the position.

[22:45]

Even if it's the lowest realm or the newest person in the monastery. If you're the newest person in the monastery, then you have a position for the newest person in the monastery. And from that position, you relate, you actualize yourself and relate to everyone else. And as the newest person in the monastery, This position gives you the opportunity to become light, to be a magnet activity. There's no position that's any better than any other. This is, you know, hierarchy goes two ways, horizontally and vertically. everybody's next to each other, in the same position.

[23:48]

The nervous person in the monastery, horizontally, is on the same level as the devil. It has the same opportunity for realization as everyone else. This is the most familiar thing. Everyone is completely equal. But on the other hand, is a critical relationship. The one that's at the bottom is at the bottom, and the one that's at the top is at the top. And anyone else is somewhere in between. So we have to respect each one's position. So if you're here, you respect the people over here. And then you also help the people that are here. So each one, it's a little bit like a ladder, each one is following the one at the top and helping the one below.

[24:59]

This is our work kit. So the one at the bottom doesn't have any body to go. As soon as someone else comes, then he has a little authority. He said, I'll tell you what to do. And that's very good, actually. Even if a new person comes and you're the last new person, you feel that you can help that person with a really good experience. It's nice. When I was at Sokoji, in the early 60s I used to help people when we had sashim or just Zazan every year we used to we didn't have in the beginning we didn't have Zanthans we used to say that the Chinese

[26:15]

before we sat on the floor on the brussel. The brussel is a thin little knife, it's a little bit more than a sheet. And you didn't sit on the bottom, you'd sit on the floor on the brussel. And we never heard of such things. And when we started using Xanikin, we thought that was very self-indulgent. You know, if you sat with one leg up, then you're able to be on the floor. that's how it went to the 6,000. So we put them dosing at some point. And when I would see new people, even though I was pretty new myself, I would always help them. I would always show them what to do. I would not ignore the fact that they were new and didn't know what to do. And without saying anything, I would just, you know, do something. Because it felt...

[27:15]

I had no position whatsoever, but in doing that, I felt that I belonged there. I felt that I was carrying out something and fulfilling something. So, I listened to my teachers, and half the people were getting more of who were good in a way that I felt like about them. So that's how we practice together. People who are a little older help the people who remember in a way that makes sense. He says, When all the many monasteries located on the various mountains I visited in San Antonio,

[28:20]

the ones holding their respective offices work in their capacity for one year to come, yet they always maintain and exhibit the same attitude as the whole of the community, applying that attitude appropriately to the time and circumstances. And he talks about the three aspects of that attitude. He says, the three aspects of this attitude are to see that working, one, working for the benefit of others benefits oneself. Two, to understand that through making every effort for the prosperity of the community, one revitalizes one's own character. And three, to know that endeavoring to succeed and to surpass the ancestors of past generations means to learn from their lives and value their examples. The three aspects of this attitude are to see that working for the benefit of others benefits oneself.

[29:22]

These are our three aspects of one thing. Working for the benefit of others benefits oneself. Also, we assume the attitude that if I give too much to others, I won't have anything left for myself. This is a very funny attitude. that I have a limited amount of something that I can give. And if I give it away, I won't have it for myself. It's a kind of strange attitude, but it does prevail sometimes. Actually, the more we give, the more we fill. It's going to be like a well. Sometimes a well is wrong, it's true. The more we get away, the bigger we get.

[30:29]

The more we actually get. The less we get, the more stingy we are in ourselves, the smaller we get. The capacity keeps getting smaller and smaller. He says, working for the benefits, for the benefit of others, benefits of oneself. Without thinking about whether or not something is going to benefit us. It's just like, exactly, saying Zazim. Without thinking about what is the benefit of Zazim, or what's it going to do for you, or what's the result, we just do Zazim. We just have people. It doesn't matter what the benefit is. If you're thinking about the benefit, then you cut yourself off the benefit, actually.

[31:41]

As soon as the idea of self and benefit ends, we cut ourselves off. For the sake of zazen, we help others for the sake of helping. And we don't even think necessarily this is helping. If you think too much this is helping, then you may not be helping. If you think too much this is helping, then you get stuck in Second is to understand that through making every effort for the prosperity of the community, what revitalizes is one's own character.

[32:43]

What actually has benefited is our own character. We don't get anything, especially, but our own character becomes improved. That's one of the points of practice. What is it that benefits? There is some benefit to practice. One of the benefits is that hopefully our character improves. Character improves means we lose our sense of self-centeredness. When we lose our sense of self-centeredness or selfishness, and character automatically improves. But if we try to improve our character, even though we work very hard, it won't work.

[33:52]

If I try to change myself, as much as I try to change myself, it just doesn't work. And the more I try to change myself, the more I'm amazed I am. I never noticed that. If we ever tried to change but when we lose our self-centeredness and our selfishness, our character will change and become a true character. When we talk about who I am, myself, and then we say myself is ego. There are two selves, two selves. One is, or two personalities. One is personality, which we call ego. And the other is true personality. And the true personality is the personality we have when we take a cover of.

[35:01]

Our true, the accumulation of, desire and ideas and opinions falls away. And this happens when we lose our idea of self-centeredness and selfishness. So when we give ourselves over, that's the step selflessness. When we support the community and stop worrying about ourselves, we may think, if I don't worry about myself, who will worry about me? You know, when we worry about something, it's really hard to let go of it.

[36:02]

Because if I don't worry about it, it will disappear. And if it will disappear, Where am I? This is the problem of denying that we hang on to something and we worry. And what we worry about is our own feelings. We get stuck in our feelings. And we're going to go, It's not dirty. But nowhere is the place to be. But we don't know. Maybe they can lose their continuity.

[37:02]

That's okay to lose continuity. If it's just continuity based on self-centeredness, it's okay to lose it. The first act of letting go of self-centeredness is to support the people around you, and support the community, and let go of our own mediums. Our needs would be met. But if we try to meet our needs, if we try to fulfill our needs, it's endless. striving to fulfill our needs, which can never be fulfilled. The only way our needs can be fulfilled is if we let go of our needs and take care of things. And then, everything will come to us.

[38:03]

But it's hard to see it. Really hard to see it in actually that way. We really like to live. and to know that in their way to succeed and to surpass the ancestors of those generations, means to learn from their lives and value their examples. So I think you know how patriarchs or ancestors did it, which would do even better than that. I mean, this should be an aspiration. You say, sometimes in Zen, We shouldn't have any goals. But that's not quite true. We have to have aspiration.

[39:09]

If we don't have aspiration, we don't know which way to go. So, and we say, well, get rid of desire. But you can't get rid of desire. If you get rid of desire, you don't have any mentality. So, our desire has to go somewhere. If it doesn't go into... passing the ancestors, maybe they're going to try and satisfy our many desires today. So if you put your desire here, then there's a way to go. That would be satisfying. Then he says, be very clear about this.

[40:11]

A fool sees oneself as another, but a wise person sees others as themselves. As an ancient teacher has said, two-thirds of our days are already over. and we have not practiced clarifying who we are. We waste our days in chasing satisfaction, so that even when called, we refuse to turn around. Not to encounter a true teacher will result in being led around by your feelings and emotions. The case of a foolish son of a wealthy man moving home with a family, treasure, and throwing away that so much rubbish is truly a pathetic one. Likewise, to the extent that we are familiar with what the work of the Tenzo is, we must not scoundrel.

[41:17]

He's talking about the story of the power of the sun in the afternoon. This is based in the Lotus Sutra and in the Bible, the story of the water of the sun. And as the treasure scene was taught, But he doesn't know he has it. He says, I know he's already. Finally, he turns home. But he doesn't recognize his home. But his father is living in his name. And he sends his servants up to ask him to come back. And they don't tell him. And so they give him a job. And he starts working pretty soon. He works, he understands how to practice.

[42:21]

And finally, this finally reveals himself. And he says, oh, this is really yours. This is the story. It's not. We don't realize necessarily that it's our true home. We don't realize it, but we don't just believe it. We sometimes are very sticky. afternoon [...]

[43:57]

Thank you. [...]

[44:30]

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