I vow to chase the truth with a bloodbath. It's a little unusual to have a bodhisattva ceremony in the middle of the day, since it's the full moon ceremony. But we usually try to make it on the full moon, if possible. Sometimes, for convenience, we move a ceremony to a more convenient time. But we try to make it on the full moon.

[01:01]

But I don't mind having it in the daytime. I think it's fun, especially when we're all here already. So that's why we do it, because we're here already. We make it a little more convenient for ourselves. Bodhisattva ceremony is called sanghe, and it really means confession. but not just confessing your sins. You know, it's not like, exactly like confessing your sins in a Catholic church. It's, although it comes from, I think it maybe grows out of the Uposata ceremony of the, Theravadan tradition, which is more like confessing your sins, actually.

[02:07]

I think twice a month, the bhikkhus get together and have a ceremony where they tell each other what they've done wrong. And each person has someone that they talk to, and that's very secret. what they say. That's a good ceremony, I think. Our ceremony is more open and not specific. And it has two parts. The first part is recognizing our shortcomings or recognizing our karmic life, actually. I don't know if we look at it as shortcomings exactly. We really don't make so much of a judgment on it. But we look at our, we recognize our karmic life and

[03:25]

and the difficulties we have with our life of karma. And then the second part, we renew our vows. So it has those two parts. One is recognizing our karmic life, and the other is renewing our vows to practice. And when the ceremony is over, we should feel refreshed and ready to start all over again, ready to start practice all over in a fresh way. So it's very important how we act immediately after our Bodhisattva ceremony. We should be especially mindful at that time how we proceed.

[04:32]

Pretty soon, you know, we're all tangled up in vines and brambles again. But at this time, we're quite free. We've recognized our karma. and renewed our vows to continue practicing to save all sentient beings, which is also our self. And to renew our faith in the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas of our own mind. We say homage to Shakyamuni Buddha, and Maitreya Buddha, and Manjushri Bodhisattva, and Samantabhadra Bodhisattva, and Avalokiteshvara Bodhisattva.

[05:42]

These are all the Bodhisattvas of our own mind. In the Sixth Patriarch Sutra, Platform Sutra, he says, When I say that I'm going to save all sentient beings, what I mean is to save all the sentient beings of my own mind. The deluded mind, the avaricious mind, the jealous mind, and so forth. So it really means to work to save ourself. That we actually have a way of dealing with karma.

[06:45]

And the way of dealing with karma is living our life through these vows. not just being pulled around by karma, but having some control of ourself and practicing with other people in order to establish the reality of what we're doing. So since we have the opportunity to practice, that's a kind of blessing that we have.

[07:48]

And so we should take advantage of the opportunity that we have to practice. And you know, in Zen practice, we always talk about hard effort. With no effort, there's no practice. That's a kind of gauge, a measurement, a way of measuring practice or our result. No effort, no practice. One hour's effort is one hour's practice, is one hour's practice of realization. So, effort and discipline are always emphasized in our practice. We don't have monastic discipline because we're not in a monastery, and we don't have monastic practice, but we do have a moment-to-moment practice wherever we are and whatever we're doing.

[08:58]

And that's what we mean by effort in practice, to make our effort on each moment wherever we are. And when we talk about discipline, there's a kind of discipline that is appropriate for a monastery, and there's a kind of discipline that's appropriate for daily life. Discipline, we tend to think of as something regimental, or in the army they have discipline. But discipline in a broader meaning means limiting something in order to contain it. So examples of discipline are the sun and the moon and the earth and the planetary system.

[10:06]

That's a kind of discipline. And without that discipline, our solar system doesn't work. And in practice, we have each one of us is within a planetary system. And when we know our place in the planetary system of our practice, and we maintain the discipline of it, then we have practice. Actually, in a monastery it's very easy to see the planetary system. Actually, in all of our activity there's some kind of planetary system.

[11:17]

There's usually a sun and satellite parts that revolve around that sun. Sometimes we're a sun and sometimes we're a satellite. And we have to know where we are and how we take our place. within any given system that we're part of at any moment. And so that's kind of like the basis of discipline. So our practice in its strict sense, or very formal sense, is based on certain patterns. And those patterns give us a sense of discipline. And when we sit zazen, we sit for a certain amount of time without uncrossing our legs.

[12:25]

So we call that discipline. That's a kind of discipline, too. And willpower is part of discipline, and intention is part of discipline. And just being able to maintain your home is a kind of discipline. Being able to maintain your room or the place where you have work or play or family life, that's a kind of discipline too. Just being able to stay with your family is a kind of discipline. Being able to stay in the right-hand lane when you're driving down the street is a kind of discipline. And stopping at the stop signs.

[13:28]

And making sure that you're controlling the street. You know, when we drive down the street, we have to control the street. We have to control the traffic on the street. Looks like that each person is an individual and that we don't have anything to do with what they're doing, with the other people that are driving on the street. But if we have awareness of what everyone is doing on the street, we really have sharp awareness of all the cars in our vicinity. And when we come to an intersection, we have an awareness of the cars in the intersection and on the street that we're coming to. Then we have the ability to control the traffic on the street.

[14:35]

And what we do affects everybody else on the street. How we drive our car affects everybody else on the street. So, if you drive correctly, in a way that you know is right, then that helps other people to do that as well. And if you're not mindful or not careful, not thinking, then you become a kind of danger and people drive around you accordingly. And so the whole street becomes a little uncertain. If you're uncertain, the people around you become a little hesitant or uncertain about what they're doing. So, when you have good driving discipline, you control the street.

[15:45]

So, Discipline is necessary just in order to do something, just in order to make something happen. We have to have discipline. And if we don't have it, then the thing that we're trying to do doesn't work, really doesn't work. And discipline and integrity go together. Integrity means the ability to hang together, to hang all the parts together. integral unity. So integral unity and discipline is integrity. So we should always have a sense of integrity with whatever we're doing. So what goes along with that is what we call sincere practice or hard practice.

[17:03]

Without making the effort to create that integrity, our effort doesn't mean much. It gets kind of wasted or dissipated. In the You know, the old story of Bodhidharma's disciple, Eka, Taiso Eka. In the Mumon-Khan, in case number six, Mumon talks about Bodhidharma's disciple, Eka, who was actually quite a brilliant man. had studied Confucianism and Taoism and Buddhism, and was looking for a good teacher.

[18:05]

He was really looking for what the essence of Buddha Dharma was. And he studied with Bodhidharma for quite a while, but he didn't have enlightenment. He didn't really have he hadn't penetrated to essence of mind. And so one day he was, he wanted to become, well, he wanted to become Bodhidharma's disciple, actually. And Bodhidharma was sitting facing the wall. This story has some comic parts, but Bodhidharma was very intent on his own practice, which impressed Eka. And Eka wanted to become his disciple, but Bodhidharma wouldn't have anything to do with him. This is quite common in Zen practice.

[19:08]

A disciple, somebody wants to become disciple of a teacher, but the teacher won't have anything to do with him. And it's a kind of way of testing the disciple. The teacher says, he doesn't say, get out of here. Sometimes he does. Sometimes he says, get out of here. But he doesn't really want the person to leave. Or he just ignores him and waits to see what the disciple is going to do. So Eka was one day standing out in the snow. And he wanted to see Bodhidharma. And it started snowing. And at some point, it must have gotten awfully cold. And Eka was a little tired of waiting, so he cut off his arm and presented it to Bodhidharma. And he said, OK, will you see me now? And Bodhidharma said, yes, I'll see you now. This story, we don't like to say, well, it's just a story.

[20:09]

He didn't really cut off his arm. But so we won't say that. But it's a kind of extreme example in Buddhism that we have these extreme examples of effort. In order to gain the Dharma, we have these extreme examples of effort. And this example of Eka cutting off his arm and offering it to Bodhidharma is kind of symbolic of giving up everything in order to find the supreme way. And this kind of effort is very much appreciated, but I think we have to be very careful I would hate to see somebody come with their arm someday and say, is this enough?

[21:12]

You know, the most appreciated way of practice is very steady, calm practice. Not to make a big splash, not to create some dramatic kind of presentation of your practice. That kind of presentation usually doesn't last. Sometimes people will say, I want to practice. When can I start doing that? As soon as they say that, you know that they don't want to practice. That's almost always the case. Sometimes people will come two or three times over a period of time and say, I really want to start practicing. And they'll maybe shave their head or talk as if they really want to do something. But you know that that person is not going to ever practice, not until they get rid of the notion that they want to do something dramatic.

[22:27]

So the first thing that a person has to get rid of is the idea that they want to do something dramatic or something outrageous. And our practice always, it's like really taking everything away from a person. Eventually, you know, when you start to practice, you realize that everything is kind of taken away. All of your ideas about practice, all of your ideas about what anything is, is taken away. And this is the most essential place to be. And sometimes it takes a long time to get there. Sometimes it takes a long time to get to the point where you just give up everything.

[23:33]

But it's not a dramatic process. Suzuki Roshi was always very careful with people. One of his most famous phrases is to just do something little by little, make a little bit of progress. If you can make a little bit of progress, That's very good. The effort, you know, comes in steadiness and in discipline, as I was talking about it, integrity. Not in trying to get Kensho. There are some practices which drive you very hard to get some kind of enlightenment experience.

[24:41]

That's a kind of materialistic spiritual practice, actually, which we always try to avoid. And sometimes we think of that effort as being directed in that way. Usually when we think of effort in Zen practice, we think of effort to get enlightened, driving yourself to get enlightened. But the harder you try to get enlightened, the further away it goes. So our effort is to have a very steady practice, steadiness and regularity, and discipline within that steadiness and regularity, and to eliminate the gap between formal practice and daily life.

[25:50]

And that's called life of enlightenment without seeking enlightenment. It's called enlightened practice without seeking enlightenment. And, you know, if you really are sincere, that's your offering, actually. Offering your arm, you know, is if you have that kind of sincerity of being it, being practiced. That's your offering. And we always appreciate that kind of offering.

[26:57]

It's good to practice hard and to practice steadily, hard and steadily. But to not be, try to get ahead, not try to do something too much or you'll wear yourself out. And if you realize that practice is forever. Practice is not for some period of time until you get enlightenment. Practice is forever. And if you have the realization that practice is forever, then practice is a matter of everydayness. It's just your everyday life. not something special. And if you really make that effort to make everyday life your practice, and make practice everyday life, then that's where the effort goes.

[28:20]

There are some people who should be monks, some people who should be lay people, some people should have families, some people should be single. Everyone is a little different. We don't try to make everybody's practice exactly the same. And so we have a very diverse kind of energy because all of our lives are a little different. The effort is to merge with our life, no matter what we're doing. And You know, in the Bodhisattva's vows, when we do the Bodhisattva ceremony, we immerse ourselves in Buddha's way and make the intention to

[30:00]

harmonize with the world, harmonize with things, with our surroundings, actually. Harmonize with our surroundings. That's what a big part of our practice, is knowing how to harmonize with our surroundings, wherever we are, and knowing how to take our place, knowing what our place is, wherever we are. If you know what your place is wherever you are, then you're always in control. It's not that you're controlling a situation outside of yourself, but by knowing where you are in the situation, knowing what your place is, you control the situation. You control... You have some control. You're your own boss. So it's like driving down the street.

[31:06]

When you know your place exactly in the street, you control the street. And you won't have any trouble. So driving a car You know, we drive a lot in our culture. Driving is, we spend a lot of time on the road and it's a real place to practice. And the main thing is to have enough confidence in your own ability and to Always assess the situation, what everyone is doing around you, and what's happening in your surroundings, your immediate surroundings, each moment of change.

[32:14]

Each moment the situation is changing, and each moment you have to know what position everyone is in, in this game, in this place, which is constantly changing, constantly changing, constantly changing, and then something surprising happens. When something surprising happens, you automatically know what to do without thinking. You should know automatically what to do without thinking when something surprising happens. If you have that kind of awareness, But that kind of awareness we should have in all of our activities. And it comes from being harmonious with our surroundings, knowing where we are, and being mindful, and merging, being one with our activity. When I drive a car, I don't like to talk. I was always an uninteresting cab driver. If I drove a taxi, people would strike up conversations with me and I didn't like it because I wanted to keep my mind on the road.

[33:25]

And I always depend on my ear for what's around me. You hear what's around you and then in back of you and so forth and then you can tell where you are. So if somebody's talking to me, somebody's always talking to me, but I'm always listening to the traffic. So I'm a pretty bad conversationalist in a car. Even when people are talking in the back seat, I don't hear them. I don't listen. Actually, that's the way we should drive a car as practice. Not to hold a conversation, although we do, and I won't say that it shouldn't, because it's a great time to talk, you know. But if you can do it, you know, when you drive, to really pay attention to, with your senses, to how you're driving.

[34:28]

What's going on, to what's going on around you. Paying attention with your eyes and your ears. and your feeling, just sensory feeling. So in a monastery, practice in a monastery is just like driving a car on the road, in that sense. You're paying attention to what everybody in that situation is doing. And your senses are open and your mind is open. And the more that happens, the more aware you are of where you are. And you know what to do more easily. You don't have to think so much. You can act more out of intuition.

[35:32]

Act more directly. So that kind of effort, effort to be aware, is real effort. And to always be willing to do something. Always be willing to do what people ask, actually. You don't always have to do what everybody asks, but you need to have a basic willingness. You have a basic willingness. then we can choose whether or not to do something. But more often than not, we're able to say yes. It's important to be able to

[36:40]

say yes. If we, you know, a person who is very talented and very able will usually be asked a lot to do something. And what they do is always, will always be appreciated. And that person will always eventually become, always have some kind of position or responsibility. But you also need to be able to know what you can do and what you can't do. So you also have to be able to say, no, I can't. This is my limitation. But if you only abide by your limitation, if you're always saying no, then you should look at that. and be able to be more generous and to give without always feeling that we're being taken advantage of.

[37:42]

So sometimes we should be taken advantage of. We should allow ourselves to be taken advantage of and not feel depleted by it. If we're always feeling depleted, there's some problem that we have. Because giving also is part of renewal. You know, if you exercise a lot, you get a lot of energy. If you give a lot of energy, then your energy becomes renewed, if you're open. But if you feel that your energy is being stolen, then you don't get any, your energy doesn't become renewed by giving or by movement or by energy, by exercise. If you think that your energy is being stolen or appropriated, you get very tired and nothing comes back to you. So the way to stay healthy is to constantly be giving your energy.

[39:00]

And then your energy is constantly being renewed. What you give is what you get back. So in our practice, we're always giving ourselves to the situation, to whatever we're doing. And so consequently, we have energy and we're always being renewed. This is a kind of giving up, actually. Repentance, you know, is a kind of way of giving up and starting again. And the way we see repentance, you know, is not to say, oh, I'm sorry and tear your clothes, but just to renew ourself. You know, when you recognize something is going off, then you leave that what's going off and get on. So we're constantly just going off and getting back on, going off and getting back on.

[40:04]

It's just like sitting in zazen. We bring our attention back to our sitting. Our mind is always wandering. That's not a sin, you know, but we keep bringing it back because it's not where we want it to go. So when we see that we're getting off our path, we just bring ourselves back. And that's called repentance. To just renew or just straighten out our direction again. No blame. It's not a matter of blame. And we shouldn't feel in that way. So We don't really call wrongdoing so much sins, although you can if you want to. We call it ignorance.

[41:07]

We do something that's not right out of ignorance. Sometimes we do it willfully, but that's still ignorance. We do something willfully, it's still ignorance. because it's ignorance of consequences. So if we realize the consequences of our actions, what they're going to be, then our vow is to, because we realize that, we want to not make those kinds of mistakes and we vow to stay on the path so that we don't keep falling into miserable states, suffering states. And so our effort should always be to stay on the path.

[42:14]

Make that kind of effort. That's what I mean by really strong effort. Just keep making an effort to stay on the path. So we're renewing our vows. Once a month we renew our vow to stay on the path and to save all the sentient beings of our own mind and do whatever we can. and to pay homage to the various Buddhas and Bodhisattvas of our own mind. Shakyamuni Buddha, who is our Self, and each other.

[43:17]

There are innumerable Shakyamuni Buddhas, which is all of the Sangha is a Shakyamuni Buddha. We don't look at some Buddha, some person in the distant past, as some Shakyamuni Buddha. For us, Shakyamuni Buddha is not just a historical figure. So everything that we're talking about is right here now. The future Buddha is also each one of us. Present Buddha is each one of us. Manjushri Bodhisattva is our wisdom mind. Samantabhadra Bodhisattva is our practice mind.

[44:19]

And Avalokiteshvara is our compassionate mind. So we pay homage to all the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas of our own mind. That way we can understand something about Buddhas and Bodhisattvas, not as some distant relative. And Prajnaparamita is our own wisdom. Not ego wisdom, but our universal mind wisdom. In Buddhism, we're always talking about mind.

[45:24]

And when Eka came to Bodhidharma, he said, I can't find the essence of mind, will you help me out?" And Bodhidharma said, well, show me your mind and I'll help you. Bring it forth. Put it out there. And Eka said, well, I can't do it. You know, I can't find it. I mean, I can't really put my finger on it. It's like Bodhidharma, it's like, I don't know. I don't know, that kind of answer. I can't find it, is like, I don't know. And Bodhidharma said, that's good, your mind is pacified, I pacified your mind for you.

[46:31]

Buddhism is very much concerned with mind and what is mind. And intellectually, you can read a lot in Buddhism about what is mind. Consciousness, mind and consciousness. Citta and vijnana. But in Zen practice, we have to find the mind. In practice, we have to find it. Where is your mind? Where is this mind? What is mind? What is it anyway? We're not talking about brains. We're talking about mind. So we say, mind is universal. Our mind covers everything. This mind, my mind, is not my mind. There are many, many koans dealing with mind. What is mind? Is Buddha mind or is Buddha not mind?

[47:40]

So this is a big question. Bring me your mind. When we practice, we have to bring our mind and show our mind. Then we have this question, what is mind? What is the limit of mind? And so we can say, when we discover our mind, when we discover our no mind, all the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas fit into our mind. Everything fits into our mind. So when we think of mind, we think of it on that scale, but also we say no mind.

[48:54]

Mind is no mind. It's like talking about emptiness, form and emptiness. Mind is like the form of no form, but yet it's also a form. And everything is mind only. In the Yogacara doctrine, everything is mind only. Maybe you don't need only, everything is mine. So anyway, let's continue our practice.

[50:11]

And then next month we'll have another Bodhisattva Sermon where we can renew our vows again. Actually, we should be renewing our practice every day. When we sit Zazen at five o'clock in the morning, we're renewing our practice. Renewing just for that day. Just for that day. So actually, we should be constantly giving up and renewing. Our practice is constant giving up and constant renewal. And if we have that always in our mind, we can have a sense of practice. Do you have one question?

[51:17]

The question is a comment on the idea of control, which is something that I struggled with for a long time. One of the things when we first begin practice is thinking about letting go. So a lot of energy goes into that. And I can remember when I first started sitting, it was kind of a vacation for me to be able to be relieved of the necessity to control things. be it in my family or my job or whatever. And it's like lots of things that we talk about can kind of reinforce that. At some point, the idea of control started changing.

[52:39]

And I think it's what you were talking about. driving down the street. It's not really to create some kind of static environment to maneuver things so that they turn out a certain preconceived way, but just by taking things as they appear. And sometimes that means that you do take on an aggressive role. You know, when to be aggressive and when to be passive. You have to know. And not to take, to just kind of fade into the woodwork. That's right. Not to be one way or the other, but to be able to use each way, each extreme, whenever it's necessary. So, the active side and the passive side, and when they're right together, they're just right.

[53:42]

It's like following the waves and pushing the waves. And it's like following and leading at the same time. If you're too aggressive in leading, then everything, you confuse everybody too much. And if you're too, if you only follow, then there's no energy. So, just to always make it just right, so that following and leading is the same. That's what we're always, should be practicing toward. Then there's nobody controlling anybody. There's just, everything is under control. Sentient beings are numberless.

[54:58]

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