penetrating and perfect dharma is rarely met with even in a hundred thousand million kappas having it to receive and listen to to remember and accept i vow to taste the truth of the tathagata's words good morning Sun is shining bright on a crisp, very late autumn morning here in Berkeley. And this is the last Dharma talk of 2021. My plan for today is to, sooner or later,

[01:01]

get around to a small review of what this year has been and to think ahead a little and to see what you are thinking and anticipating. I don't know about you, but I'm ready to bid farewell. to a difficult year. It's been the second year of restriction and waves of infection. And now we're beginning to come to terms with the fact that a new wave may be arising or perhaps inevitably is arising. We've had a year of masts, another year of masts and separation, a year of, for many of us, long hours on Zoom, a year in which we lost our beloved teacher, Sojin, and we came to terms with all kinds of changes, changes in our Sangha, changes in our lives, changes in our world.

[02:30]

thinking of something that Joanna Macy said last week, which was on the other side of loss lies love. We could also say on the other side of love lies loss. They're one reality. One coin perhaps with two sides, but I don't even like to think that's not like two sides. They're so completely flowing into and from each other. So I wanted to play you a song before I sort of go deeper into that matter of love and loss and what the year has been and what the new year will bring. So let's see if I can.

[03:39]

The song I'm going to play you was I recorded it with some friends on my friends, Kate Brislin and Susie Thompson. It was written by Bernice Reagan, whom some of you may know as one of the founders of the It's a great singing group, Sweet Honey and the Rock. And let me see if I can share the screen and play the song. So just while I'm doing this, just please put your feet on the ground and settle yourself. Find your breath. But Hey, Ko, you have to allow me to share. You have to make me the co-host. Do you know how to do that?

[04:50]

Working on it, Hozan. In full screen view, I can't see that. So let me try something else. There you are. Let's try it. Let's see. Excellent. Okay. Okay. Take a breath. Okay. So I was moved to reflect on Wednesday.

[08:44]

We lost another great teacher, Bell Hooks, a woman who opened the doors of connection for many of us, helping us to see a kind of rich entanglement of love, Buddhism, She was a dedicated Buddhist practitioner. And the suffering of our various illusory views of the differences among us. So I'll read a couple of very short passages from bell hooks. They're taken from a... a talk she gave called Towards a Worldwide Culture of Love.

[09:46]

Fundamentally, the practice of love begins with acceptance. The recognition that wherever we are is the appropriate place to practice. That the present moment is the appropriate time. I think that this is another way of articulating what we've been taught by Sojin, Suzuki Roshi, and all of our elders. This acceptance and receptivity and ability to include everything as to think of it as a manifestation of love. She goes on, she says, but for so many of us, our longing to love and be loved has always been about a time to come, a space in the future when it will just happen, when our hungry hearts will finally be fed, when we will find love.

[11:04]

I think some of us over the years have often heard in the Q&A after lecture, people would ask Sojin, why don't we talk about love or why don't we talk more about love? And I know that he found this a kind of exasperating question. He would say essentially, that's all I'm ever talking about. But somehow this shining gem of love is, we may not see it shine so clearly. It seems hidden in the rigors of zazen, the precepts, notions of emptiness, wisdom, and even

[12:16]

And for those of us who are also have an understanding or are drawn towards perspectives of engaged Buddhism, we're looking at the dharmic understandings of nonviolence, of social justice and human rights. But for me, Love in all of its manifestations is there all along in the Buddhist teachings. Again, as Joanna was talking about, and I think her whole talk also was articulating this. The great ball of merit that she spoke of is also this... I think of it as like a dough ball that you form into cookies.

[13:23]

And in the dough is grief and love and loss and gratitude. These are all the ingredients that we make into the cookie of life. There's a metaphor for you. The great cookie of life. Or the great chocolate chip cookie of life. or oatmeal cookie, if you will. So Martin Luther King Jr. also frequently spoke about love. And he, from his theological studies, he would describe three kinds of love. Eros is taken from the Greek, eros, or romantic love. philia, which is the reciprocal affection between friends, and agape, which is much like the Buddhist expression of love that we call metta or maitri.

[14:35]

It's unconditional love. And Dr. King, usually emphasized agape in his sermons. But what I've come to think is that for Buddhists and for just plain people, we need to find balance of all three in our lives. There's a kind of, it can be a kind of we might feel a kind of abstractness in this unconditional love. But unconditional love includes philia, love between friends, love between peoples, and romantic love, which is just this incredible joy of connection.

[15:48]

All of these are part of the whole package. So to go back to Bell Hooks, she writes, when I began years ago now to focus on the power of love as a healing force, no one really disagreed with me. Yet what they continue to accept in their daily life is lovelessness. Because doing the work of love requires resisting the status quo. I think my understanding is that if you're saying it, to do the work of love means really... accepting yourself and being willing to step forward to meet others, to meet oneself, meet oneself in others and others in oneself.

[17:02]

And kind of the social status quo or the status quo of our societies is often kind of distance and lingering on the differences that we have. And I don't think that's our practice. The very form of our practice, maybe not exactly here on Zoom, but in the Zendo, is we sit right next to each other. And each of us has our own can I say, makes our own effort, has our own struggle to engage with ourselves and to harmonize all of our activities, to move together through Zazen, through Kinyin, through service, through meals, through work.

[18:16]

We do this side by side. We don't do it alone, although each of us has our individual work to do. To go back to Bell Hooks, in Thich Nhat Hanh's recent treatise on the subject, True Love, the Practice of Awakening the Heart, he reminds us that, quote, to love in the context of Buddhism is above all to be there. Or to be here. He then raises the question of whether or not we have time for love. Of course we have time for love. It's not whether we have time for love. It's whether we allow that time to manifest in our lives. whether we set aside the things that pull us away from connection and really focus on this thing above all to be there or above all to be here.

[19:35]

Bill Hooks takes off from that saying, Right now, there's such a profound collective cultural awareness that we need to practice love if we are to heal ourselves and the planet. The task awaiting us is to move from awareness to action. Of course, this is what Joanna Macy was talking about last week. And something on my wall above my desk. It's a short. excerpt from Thich Nhat Hanh, something that he wrote in the 80s, and it is kind of exerted from one of his earlier books, and it has a sort of broadside or small poster that says, mindfulness must be engaged. And in that piece, he says,

[20:47]

He makes the case for mindfulness in a short description of what it is. And he says, mindfulness must be engaged. Mindfulness must manifest as activity. Because if mindfulness is not... shall we say, married to action, then what's the point of mindfulness? And this is also, this is not just Thich Nhat Hanh, this is not just engaged Buddhism, this is, if you go back to the end of Dogen's Genjo Koan, where a monk meets Master Bao Che, and asked Master Boucher about the nature of enlightenment reaching everywhere.

[21:52]

And Boucher uses a metaphor of it's like the wind reaching everywhere. And while he's doing this, he's fanning. And the monk says, basically, if the nature of wind reaches everywhere, Why are you fanning? And Master Boucher says, you understand something about the nature of wind, but you don't understand fanning. So, we have to think of our practice as the activity of love. the activity of the fact that everything is changing every moment. So, Bell Hooks question, do we have time for love?

[23:01]

We must have time. Our time of practice, being here listening to the Dharma, being in the Zendo, going shopping, You know, doing the laundry. Every moment is the time for the manifestation of love. So let's just take a breath here. And. move from this vast subject, which has been incompletely addressed, to some reflection on this year and next year.

[24:03]

We've had our losses. We continue to have our losses. And also, we've seen our sangha grow. There are quite a few people who show up for the Dharma talks, who show up on Monday mornings for the Wayseeking Mind talks, for Zazen online. We have this small BCC satellite sangha now in Kerala, India. If you come in the morning, you know, you'll see these folks who are sitting with us every morning, and families are sitting, the kids are sitting. How many of our kids do we ever see Atsasana? Not so many. It's different in India, because actually kids are more interested in doing what their parents are doing than perhaps we were.

[25:14]

But that's fine. It's just very sweet to see them. And in fact, new people are showing up from distant corners of the country, distant corners of the world on Zoom for daily zazen, for daily practice. We've cultivated a certain, well, we've cultivated technology and have developed our skills in it. pretty far beyond where we were in March of 2020. And it's a technology that allows us to be connected. It allows us to see each other's face right here on Zoom. And in a certain way to have, there's a certain richness of connection that we've cultivated because we needed it.

[26:19]

being disembodied, that, I don't know, maybe we're going to carry over when we get back in person. Maybe when we're back in the Zendo, at the end of Zazen in the morning, we should turn to each other and greet each other with a morning greeting, person to person, like we do here. That would be kind of innovative. I know that the technology does not suit everybody, that it's wearying, and it's not everybody's cup of tea, and it's not a substitute in any way for the face-to-face or body-to-body practice that we have cherished and cultivated for years. For now, we've got it. And it seems that may continue.

[27:22]

And it will probably, we're probably going to need both. And we're going to probably have to find a way of sustaining both into the future. So, you know, we've been strategizing. It just changes week for week. It's really hard, you know, We went into a lot of detail in the last couple weeks strategizing about opening, you know, thinking, you know, we had been thinking about opening in early January. And then we thought again about it and moved it to January 31st to allow whatever arose. from holiday gatherings, et cetera, and to allow for some clarity about how this Omicron wave is going to unfold to have a better understanding.

[28:24]

And it really changes day by day. And so maybe we'll open on January 31st and maybe not. And I think we'll have a chance I think in the middle of the month, I'd like to have a SANGA meeting to talk about this. But even while we've strategized this reopening, we're continuing to work on the technology that will allow us to have a sort of robust online community at the same time and allow people to move freely back and forth. So my effort over this last year, this year of pandemic, this year of change of leadership, you know, I've been thinking a lot about what's really important to me and what I want to share.

[29:32]

And it's really to focus on maintaining and strengthening and this community of practice, practice that was transmitted to me and to many of you. That's what I'm trying, that's where my emphasis has been on making sure that there's a, you know, a strong vessel for our practice for the practice that we're creating cooperatively and collaboratively. In the course of this year, we have a new cohort of residents who many of you have met, and that's been really encouraging.

[30:36]

The residents have been doing a really wonderful job just taking care of the place and also taking care of the practice, being at Zazen every day. And we've been training. We've been doing training in the service positions twice a week for some months now. And that's just felt really good to do that. to be there early in the morning and just be walking through and embodying the forms that were transmitted to us. And, you know, I want to continue that when we come back together in an expanded way and have these morning trainings for anyone who's interested and many of us. many of us need refreshers.

[31:39]

One of the things, fortunately, when we do this training, I'm there, Ross is there, and Lori's there, because we've spent so long that there's details that we have to remember. So we rely on each other to figure out what it is that we did. But anyway, I really appreciate this, the activity of the new residents, of all the residents together. And we've also seen in the Sangha, Susan, Marvin, and Mira have been having monthly garden days for quite a while now, and people have been coming just really... tending the gardens and the grounds in a loving way. And it feels really good.

[32:43]

And the grounds look good. Nothing really looks neglected because it isn't neglected. And so that's just another expression of the wholeness of our community. I want to... Also appreciate all the work of the senior students in the last year or so. They led a wonderful aspect of practice period in October and November. And hopefully they will do the same thing next year. And I feel really good about it for that practice period. I just put the whole thing in their hands and they organize it. And it gives them a chance to really manifest their practice and share it with everybody.

[33:46]

This is really important to me because it was very clear when Sojin was here. Sojin was all of our teachers. All of our... He was our... Let's put that a different way. He was a teacher to all of us. And he was the founder. And he really was such a pivotal figure. And then there are many of us who've been here. There are quite a few of us who've now been here 25 or 30 years or more. Learning from him, but also learning from each other. drawing in whatever practices and knowledge we have gained in our explorations in the Dharma here and elsewhere.

[34:48]

And for me, while I've been invited and I accept the position of Abbot, I feel that the senior students and many of us have grown up together. So there's, I don't exactly feel like pater familias. I feel like we're family and siblings and I have my responsibility to that. And also I think we have just such a richness of practice experience and wisdom. So I want to honor that. And I rely on the senior students and others who are senior students, but maybe not officially senior students. I rely on all that collective wisdom.

[35:56]

It occurs to me to say something else. We're beginning... We're moving towards our first organized sewing for lay ordination that we've had in two years. We had a wonderful ceremony during aspects for people who had begun their sewing two years before. But now there's going to be a new cohort. And what I'd like to say is, first of all, if you have interest, If you have interest in lay ordination, please write to me or someone to whoever is your teacher and express your interest, and we'll explore whether that's appropriate. In our tradition, dharma transmission, wearing the brown robe, is...

[37:01]

is the verification of your empowerment to transmit the precepts in a formal way. And so that remains in the hands of people with brown robes. But we have people, I see Karen Suntime down there in the corner wearing her visibly green rock suit. People, there are a number of people along with the brown robe transmitted priests who have received lay entrustment from Sojin, and there will be others from me, and they are also teachers. And so if, just to say, if you're meeting with one of those lay entrusted teachers on a regular basis, talk to them about about Jukai or lay ordination and I will help them or we will help each other work that out.

[38:16]

So, you know, it doesn't have to be me as a teacher or Andrea or Lori or Jerry or Peter Overton. You know, we may have to do the actual the formal ceremony, but we would do it in partnership with those others who I see as teachers here. So I just wanted to say that as we're moving towards a new cohort of sewing in the new year. And I think... Finally, as a Sangha, we are living in our own natural cycle of change. And that takes place within the larger societal and global cycles and spirals of change.

[39:27]

So we hold our practice. we hold these principles of love and connection, even while we see the unfolding ravages of climate change that are not just affecting people on land that's distanced from us, but with more and more frequency, the air that we breathe and our health. You know, I went through the fires, just to say through the fires, in a couple of months ago, fires in Northern California, that triggered about a six week, pretty serious bout of asthma for me.

[40:32]

and it was hard to shake, and it was hard to breathe, you know, but I'm okay now. But that's just one, to me that's just a personal testimony to the effect of some of that change that people are experiencing in many different ways. Watching on the news the other day, there's... There's an ice shelf in Antarctica that is rapidly melting, and they said when it melts, it may very quickly cause a sea rise of three feet around the world. And that's enough to cause unimaginable damage and flooding and destruction of substantial areas of low-lying land.

[41:37]

So, this is one of the conditions. This larger cycle of change also affects our cycles of change. The same thing, we're in a moment, a historical moment, where we're recognizing we're recognizing long standing patterns of social discrimination. Discrimination of gender, race, ability, education, economic opportunity. And it seems like our, sometimes it feels like we're being assaulted. Everyone is being assaulted. For some of these communities, they felt assaulted, they have been assaulted for hundreds of years. It's not necessarily new, but for some of us, it's a fresh and difficult awareness.

[42:45]

I'd like to see that that awareness is also the seed of love. That as the awareness arises in some of us for whom it is maybe new or previously unseen, instead of having a response that divides us, it calls for a response that of embracing each other, of recognizing that patterns of discrimination and harm have fallen unequally, you know, on sisters and brothers in different ways. I mean, I could go into a lot of detail, but I'm not going to do that here.

[43:52]

But to see that, not to react from it, not to wish it would go away, but to say, How can I connect? How can I manifest the love that's being called forth in me? How can I use my practice? The practice which tells tells me to turn towards what might be uncomfortable and to embrace it and to include it. I think that's also incumbent on us. Let's try to do that. As Joanna was talking about last week,

[44:58]

Shakyamuna Buddha created a Sangha, which means association, in his day that was loosely modeled on the city-state republics of North India where he had grown up. His Sangha was based on principles of equity and of free expression. You could call this, whether in the terms of the French Revolution or in terms of my hero, B.R. M. Bedkar in India, you could call this Dharma, liberty, equality, fraternity. Buddha's communities were not perfect in every way. And they were not devoid of conflict.

[46:00]

our communities are not perfect, and there is conflict sometimes, even with the best of intentions. And that conflict, again, to attend to it, to include it is to see that as opportunity, to see that as a moment of potential creativity, not as a moment to turn away from. And that includes internal conflict, the conflicts that we feel with ourselves. So in the Buddha's way, and in the way of other spiritual traditions, his communities by and large solve their difference without violence and with the practice of great patience and great effort.

[47:14]

I know that we can do the same thing. That we can do the same thing rooted in zazen, which we can think of as another manifestation of love. I'm really sure of this. So I'm going to open up now for questions or comments. We have some minutes. And I think Heiko is going to facilitate and... I may work with him, but... Thank you, Hozan. We are ready for anyone's questions. Our comments in the chat are welcome. Hozan Roshi, I have a question.

[48:40]

When we speak of love and all the stress and loss of this past year and love again together, how do we break out of our own losses enough to reach other hearts? And how do we know if we're getting there? Well, the second part is easy for me to answer. The first is harder. Second part is it's unmistakable. You will know. You know, when your heart is broken open, you know. When it, you know, when you talk to someone and you feel this rising sensation of connection or even incipient tears you know what you're experiencing is love the first so I don't worry about that too much you know I don't think you need to worry about that too much I think the first question is is harder we have a choice and there's something about pain

[50:07]

that causes us to somehow encapsulate ourselves, to turn inward and protect ourselves. Important thing, I think, is to really notice when you're doing that and, first of all, forgive yourself because that's an organic reaction, you know, because the perhaps the organic entity feels threatened. And so it curls into a ball. And that's true psychologically as well, I think. But as practitioners, we have a choice to, can we take a moment and ask ourselves, is this how I want to respond? You know, even if you have that reaction and, you know, it's like, I am not immune from this in any way. I have it. But the practice side is that I remember that I can have some choice about this and I can decide to do something else.

[51:27]

I can decide to turn towards rather than to turn away. So you have to work that out. for yourself how to do that. But that's, to me, the principle of practice. And how would we distinguish when we are in selfish or non-selfish to what you just said? I'm not sure what you mean. When we are planning to reach out and looking for our ability or manifestation of connection, How do we know we're not doing it just for ourselves? I mean, how does that? It seems not straightforward to me. You could ask another how they are seeing you.

[52:37]

how they're seeing you, which includes how they are feeling you at this moment, and also then how they are feeling, how they are feeling. That's one of the things. I just finished writing this piece for the newsletter. Last month's or last issue was on listening, and this issue. The piece in this issue, which is the other shoe, is on speaking. At the end of it, what I suggested was begin by asking questions. That's a really good place to start. How is it for you? That's a connection also. For one to ask a question of another is already a reaching out rather than an encapsulating.

[53:40]

Okay? Thank you very much. Thank you. This is your question in the chat. Yes, I see. From Deb Self. Oh, would you please remind me what book your bell hooks was from? It wasn't from a book. It was from a digital... It was from an online talk that I found. And I think it was on... Gosh, it was either on the Buddha Dharma page or the Tricycle page. And it's hard for me to... I can find it. Problem is, you know, I can't do that in... to feel these questions at the same time, but you can find it. The title was, if somebody can type this in, maybe that'd be great.

[54:47]

The title was, Toward a Worldwide Culture of Love. Great. Questions? Comments? You have Deb Hooks, perhaps a follow-up. Go ahead, Deb. Unmute yourself. Who was it? Hi. Hi. Good morning. Thank you for the talk. I am not Deb. Neither of us is Deb. Yeah.

[55:47]

I'm Barbara Joan and this is Jeff. And thank you for the talk. And it raised a lot of thoughts that go along with the line of what I've been working on. So I deeply appreciate that. It feels, therefore, like encouragement. Some lifelong. the work of love and really believing in that. And actually, when I was really little, we would ask my mother, what's God? Like, we heard about it, but we didn't know what that meant. We weren't raised in any religious way. And she said, God is love. And that would be sort of like, that was the answer. And I think... I actually took it to heart.

[56:48]

And so there's a way I feel like to meet that with this practice has been really helpful, especially in the work of great compassion and finding a way to love the myriad cells that arise, both from within and within. from with out in the world. And one of the things I feel like I'm working hard on right now is a gratitude practice that goes with some of the things that you talked about that are so difficult in these past two years. And that is to remember with each arising emotion like the sort of anxiety I feel speaking to the song that that the privilege that affords me this opportunity is not to be taken for granted and therefore if I feel grief which of course I often feel and if I feel scared or

[58:14]

or whatever it is I feel, that it's an opportunity and an honor to be offered. And that's helped me a lot, even emotions arising. Yeah. Well, thank you. Everything that we have in our lives, we've been given. Some of it we wish we weren't given. but we have been given. And we may not be grateful always for certain aspects, but for the whole package, yes. And the challenge of practice is to find how these very obstacles, the very defilements themselves can be transformed. everything is capable of transformation.

[59:18]

So thank you for that, Professor. Thank you, everyone, for your attention and for your questions. I want to note that the link to Hozan Song is in the chat. Thank you, Ryushin. And also Paulina has given us the link to the bell hooks lecture. In just a moment, Hozan will lead us in the closing refuges at the clunk. Yeah, let me just say something. If I look at the link, so my version of that song is on YouTube. You can find it. This is the lyrics of the same, I think, of this version, but I don't think that's the version that you heard, which is fine. You should also go listen to Bernice's version, if you will. But anyway, mine is on YouTube. Probably if you do my name, you'll find it. So just checking if there's any more comment or question, and then we'll close.

[60:27]

If not, we'll close. So I hope that this is our last Saturday before we... before we close for our interim. And we'll be open again. We'll do an online New Year's Eve. So please join us for that. And then on, is it the 3rd? Is that Monday? The Monday? Monday, January 3rd, we'll be back continuing with our online practice. And our regular schedule is just continuous practice. Our regular schedule will unfold from there. So I hope that you all have healthy holidays and joyous holidays with whatever communities or family you have the opportunity to be with.

[61:32]

And I'll see you in a few weeks, if not sooner. So we'll chant the Bodhisattva vows to close. Thank you again, everyone. I would like to read our announcements here. Let's see, for December 18th. Our end of the year interim period will begin, as Hozan just mentioned, this coming Monday, ending with our New Year's Eve sitting at 8 p.m.

[62:43]

Informal Zazen will be offered throughout this period at 7.30 a.m. Regarding the New Year's Eve program, beginning at 8 p.m., people can enter at any time. At midnight, we will do a traditional ceremony, and everyone is, of course, very welcome. Other announcements, Sangha members who identify as black, indigenous, or people of color are welcome to meetings held on Mondays, 6.30 to 7.30 p.m. via Zoom. For more information, contact Samdeep Lahil. Her chat is in the box. A group has been meeting to consider ways for BCC to address racism. If you wish to participate, contact Heather Sorrentis. Her chat is also in the box. Today I've also added a link from our website to connect with teachers. If you're interested in practice discussion, please check that link or check the website for the teachers drop down menu. Thank you very much. Now everyone feel free to unmute and express your gratitude for being with everyone today.

[63:48]

Thank you. And or has just say hello. Thank you, Hozon. Thank you, Hozon. Happy holidays, everyone. Thanks, Hozon. Good to see you all. Thank you, Hozon. Thank you, Hayko. Thank you. Safe travels, Susan. Thank you. Happy holidays. Happy holidays. Happy holidays, everyone. Thank you, Hozon. Take care. Be safe. And thank you all.

[64:27]

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