Good morning. I'm pleased to welcome the teacher from the Vallejo Zen Center, Mary Mosine, here to give our talk this morning. Mary started practicing in the 80s here, I believe, and she also practiced for many years at San Francisco Zen Center and Green Gulch and Tassajara, and had a lot of leadership roles over there. And then she was ordained as a priest in 1994, so that's almost 20 years ago, I realize. And she started the Vallejo Zen Center in 2000, and received Dharma Transmission in 2005. And you were also, then you were, kind of became abbess at, I forgot that place. Oh, there was a mountain seat. There was a mountain seat at Vallejo. I think it was in 2008. Recently. Oh. So thank you. Please welcome Mary Mocine. Good morning.

[01:01]

I'm thrilled that it's raining. We had an interesting time getting in here. The dance that we did on the porch, we managed. And I'm thrilled to have the problem. So, I think that you're about to start Aspects of Practice, is that correct? And I think of that as a sort of a smaller practice period and a practice period. And we in Vallejo are about to start a more formal six-week practice period in a couple, three weeks, something like that. October 12th, whatever that is. And we're going to study the Lotus Sutra. So I'm already getting into it. So I thought I would talk about it. I've taught it before and I went back and looked at my notes.

[02:03]

It's interesting how things change. You look at some notes from ten years ago and it's dead until I get into it more. And it's really in some sense I need to start over again. And luckily there's a new translation by a guy named Gene Reeves, and you know who Tigandan Layton is, he talks here sometimes. He thinks this is really great and I will take Thay Ghen's word for that. So far I like it, but I haven't gotten very far this go-round. It's about a lot of things, but what I was thinking about for today and for people in Vallejo is that it's a practice encouraging event. the Lotus Sutra. It's also a devotional event. I don't know if it still happens. It used to be that Bhaika would lead a reading of the whole Lotus Sutra, which is one of the many practices recommended.

[03:17]

Also copying it. You can copy just part of it. Maybe we'll do that. Maybe we'll copy part of it. There are some overarching themes. It's a lot about Bodhisattva practice, about skillful means. It's a lot about the Mahayana, this sense of one vehicle, one great vehicle to carry us through. And that great vehicle is this Bodhisattva practice. And it talks about it from different perspectives. My sense in some of these things is it's as if I don't know if it was one person or a committee that wrote it in India, either 1st century BCE or 1st century CE, somewhere in there. It's somebody saying, well let's see if this gets their attention. That didn't work.

[04:17]

Okay, how about this? And so there are all these parables about practice and about this one vehicle going one great vehicle that goes on and on. This is not the one I want to talk about, but a great example is one about the Magic City, where the guide takes all these practitioners and they're practicing away and working away and sitting satins and studying the precepts, and they get really tired. So the guide says, you see that city up there? It's only a day away. Isn't that beautiful? There, that's where we're going. That's where we're going. You'll be really happy when you get there. There are baths and clean clothing and wonderful food. Just one more day. And so they say, oh, okay. And they go on and they get there and they have baths and wonderful food and they get to sleep and they get a rest for about a week and they're feeling much better.

[05:24]

And the guy gathers up and says, you know what? this is not it. It's simply the journey, so let's get going again." But then they're refreshed, so they do, but that's Bodhisattva practice. Another theme is prediction of Buddhahood for everybody, that you will be a Buddha, I will be a Buddha. If we practice diligently, we will be Buddha, which is a blessing and a curse, perhaps. Sometimes I think, if we made him into a god, then we don't have to worry about it, because it's not going to happen, right? But if he's like us, then we could practice and become Buddha. Bodhisattva Our practice is a Bodhisattva practice.

[06:26]

Does everybody know what I'm talking about? If you don't, if I'm using words, either words you don't understand or in a way you don't understand, please ask. So our practice... Tell them what a Bodhisattva is. You're new here? Do you think people are having shy attacks? Okay. Will you explain Bodhisattva? Yes. For you, I will. No, I won't. There are lots of ways of talking about a bodhisattva. One way is that it's an enlightening being. But another way of understanding it is that it's somebody who has dedicated their practice to being useful to all beings and not entering final extinction, final nirvana, until all beings are liberated. And a bodhisattva makes those wonderful impossible vows that you made this morning in the ceremony, saving all beings.

[07:30]

Delusions are inexhaustible, I vow to end them. Well, they're inexhaustible. How do I end them? But a bodhisattva is going to stay in this relative world of suffering and confusion and life and death and greed and hatred until everybody is liberated. And there are these bodhisattvas that are iconic that represent Avalokiteshvara or Kuan Yin's total compassion, Manjushri's total wisdom and Samantabhadra's shining practice. So they are exemplars to encourage us. But there's also us, baby Bodhisattvas, small herbs in terms of the Lotus Sutra. So, a Bodhisattva wants to save all beings. And what is the most useful thing in the world that we know of?

[08:40]

It's a Buddha. Right? If a Bodhisattva can save a hundred million, million, million Buddha can save as many as there are grains of sand in the river Ganges, times itself again, whatever. So that a Bodhisattva is practicing in order to realize Buddhahood and to then pass on this sweet dew of the Dharma, this sweet rain of the Dharma through infinite eons. Bodhisattva is one of those many words that you can't exactly define, you can't exactly get a handle on it, but you get a sense of it. Live for others. And that's really it. That's kind of hallmark card sentiments, but that is it.

[09:48]

Yeah? Absolutely. So, how do you say, live for all beings, and it includes this one. It's easy, thank you, because it's easy to forget that. It's easy to say everyone, and think, and mean everyone, but not include myself. And I try to remember that, to include myself. Why would a bodhisattva live for all people instead of just herself? Because that's the most useful thing you can do and it also brings you the greatest joy. I don't know if you've ever been in a 12-step meeting, but once you start, once you've been involved with one and you start being one of the people that makes the coffee or goes and unlocks the room ahead of time or sets up the chairs, you find yourself

[10:51]

entering more deeply and getting a lot more out of it. Does that make sense to you? Mary? Yes. Pretty soon I do actually. Go ahead. Okay. I'm fond of this idea that I have that I haven't shared with very many people, but the idea that this bodhisattva practice is what saves the practitioner, to take on the bodhisattva practice and to actually be able to live for other people in that way, is the liberation, is what liberates. So that's why it's a great vehicle. That's how you save yourself, is by taking on the bodhisattva practice. You could say that, I think. At any rate, there's great joy in it, and the process is liberating.

[11:56]

In other words, every time ... this doesn't happen very often for me ... every time I struggle through some ego clinging, some self clinging, and own my shadow, my whatever, and manage to let go of that, and accept something as it is, or apologize to somebody if I need to, or do something I don't want to do, or be with my fear of death, say, whatever it might be, every time I open my hand, there's a joy to it. Not maybe in the process, but in the end there's a joy to it, and that process itself is liberating. It's just always a, you know, when you say myself, it's always a yes and just, not if it's this self, but this self, yes.

[13:00]

That's working on yourself directly. Yes, but it also... Sounds a little different from the bodhisattva practice. Well, but my bodhisattva practice is a lot seeing my non-bodhisattva practice and seeing how much, how painful it is and how useless it is and how hurtful it is and da-da-da. and then letting go of it. So predicting Buddhahood for everybody, and in this sutra there are lots and lots of lists. This is an Indian event, or it's an oral event probably, and there are lots of lists of names of who's getting liberated, big bodhisattvas and little bodhisattvas. women, it mentions Mahapajapati and Yasodhara, Buddha's stepmother who raised him and his wife, and their followers, and even Devadatta. Devadatta was the Buddha's cousin, I think, and he was a terrible, terrible sangha splitter, which is one of the worst sins in Buddhism.

[14:07]

And Buddha says, even Devadatta will be a Buddha. And the response of these people that get, he says, you are going to be a Buddha and you're going to be a Buddha, may be infinite eons of serving Buddhas and practicing and so on, but eventually you will be a Buddha and you will transmit the Dharma to others. And people's response, was joy at hearing these words. And they often would say, I thought that I had reached the end of my practice because I was an arhat. I had extinguished all desires and all feeling, all greed, all hatred. So all was quiescent. And they thought that was the end of their practice.

[15:10]

Ideas in the Lotus Sutra and in Mahayana Buddhism is no, there isn't an end of practice really, but the point is to be in the world and useful, which can include meditation, you understand, including monastic practice for that matter, but to not withdraw from the world. In other words, and perhaps not, it isn't to not have feelings so much as to not be pulled around by them. not be attached to them, not be fooled by them. So these arhats were joyous, filled with joy at the thought that they could be a Buddha someday. And the Lotus Sutra is not uncommon, it's prose and then poetry. So I'm just going to read you the poetic response when he predicted It's called the 500 Arhats.

[16:13]

500 disciples, okay. So one of them, Ajnata Kaundinya, responded in verse. Having heard the voice of assurance of unexcelled peace and liberation, we rejoice in what we never had before and pay our respect to the Buddha of incalculable wisdom. Now before the world honored one, we repent our faults and errors. Of all the Buddha's immeasurable treasure, we have won only a bit of nirvana. Like ignorant and foolish people, we imagined that was enough. And here's a famous parable. It's like a poor man who, having arrived at the house of a good friend, being very rich, the friend served him a great variety of fine foods. Taking a priceless jewel, He sewed it into the lining of the man's robe, making a present to him. And then he went away without saying a word, while the man, sleeping, knew nothing about it.

[17:19]

When the man woke up, he traveled to other lands to look for food and clothing to stay alive, having a very difficult time just making a living, getting by with what little he got, and not even hoping for something better. He never realized that in the lining of his robe there was a priceless jewel. Later, the friend who gave him the jewel happened to meet this poor man. Sternly rebuking him, he showed him the jewel sewed into the robe. Seeing this jewel, the poor man was filled with great joy. Being rich in valuables and other goods, he could satisfy the five desires. This is how we were, too. For long, the world-honored one constantly took pity on us and taught us to cultivate the highest aspiration. But because of our ignorance, we neither perceived nor knew this. Having gained just a little bit of nirvana, we were satisfied and sought no more.

[18:21]

Now the Buddha has awakened us, saying, this is not the real way to extinction. Only with the attainment of unexcelled Buddha wisdom is there real extinction, I'd say Having heard from the Buddha this assurance of becoming a Buddha and its glories, and now each will give this assurance to his successor, our bodies and minds are now full of joy. Reeves comments at one point, he says, all readers of the Lotus Sutra would be well advised to ask what the story is saying about themselves. Always remember, this stuff is not just for your intellectual growth, right? These are meant to encourage us to practice. It's all about practice. So what does it mean for your practice?

[19:23]

Can you see yourself as a Buddha? Do you allow yourself to believe that your practice could lead to liberation? Do you take that seriously? Do you want the best for yourself? You know, that's such an interesting thing, because some of this language, you know, it sounds sort of grasping. You want the best for yourself? Yeah, you know, take the biggest cookie on the tray of tea, you know, even if it's over there. It's not about that. It's a parable, right? It's not about a diamond. But can you allow yourself to want the best for yourself? Can you allow yourself to take your practice seriously? Do you allow yourself to participate in the practice periods here

[20:29]

wholeheartedly? Do you take the Bodhisattva ceremony seriously? Does it mean something to you? You know, it never did to me for a long time, and yet I noticed that I kept going. I kept always finding a way to go every month. If I couldn't make it here, I'd go to Green Gulch. But I'd always go. So I thought, well, that's interesting. Somehow it means something. subconscious or something, but not consciously, and then slowly, slowly it began to sort of grow on me. It isn't a particular ceremony so much, but can you allow yourself to take yourself and your practice seriously? Can you take the precepts seriously? Do you practice with the precepts? Sometimes we say, the precepts are training wheels.

[21:33]

Well, that's one of the things they are, but only one. Deeply, they're about emptiness. Deeply, they're koans for the rest of your life. Not praising self at the expense of others. What does that mean? Of course it means don't compare yourself and say, oh, I can do that better than she can. Don't do But it means something much deeper than that. It means don't cost yourself connection. Don't act in such a way, in such a self-centered way, that you forget that all beings includes me. That we're one, that we're connected, that we're interconnected. All of them are like that.

[22:34]

Layers of meaning. Do you take it seriously? If you've taken the precepts, do you wrestle with them? I don't think there's anybody here that you've had people ... Sometimes it happens, somebody does Jukai and takes the precepts and disappears. Mel says they feel like they graduated or something. Well, not so likely. Do you see yourself as a Buddha? If that's too hard, do you see yourself as a bodhisattva? I think it's really important for us to allow ourselves to take ourselves seriously, our practice seriously. So, this jewel is our Buddha nature. It's also, it seems to me, it's our practice. It's a joy of practice that what his friend was offering what her friend was offering, was the joy of practice.

[23:41]

Because there is joy in it. But I think there's only joy in it if you do it wholeheartedly. And you can do it wholeheartedly whether you want to or not. Somebody once, I don't remember where it was, somebody once asked Sojin, Is it Zazen if during a Sishin, if it gets to where I'm sitting there and I'm really uncomfortable, I'm in pain or something, and I'm just gritting my teeth and getting through the period. Is that Zazen? And Mel said, like it, don't like it, doesn't matter a damn bit. Just sit. And I say even so, there is joy in wholehearted practice. Every time that I let go, there's joy there. Every time I renounce this ego-based event, there's joy there.

[24:45]

That's the joy of practice, I think, and that's part of what that jewel was, that encouragement. Mele used to say there's some bliss there in practice, something I don't know exactly, but it's there or we wouldn't keep doing it. Does everybody know who Maile was? Maile Scott was one of the very first priests of this temple. About 15 years ago or so, she moved up to Arcata. And then she died about, what, 10 years ago? But she was definitely a teacher for me. So I think that jewel represents the joy of practice. And we need to remember that, that it's there, it's available to us. There is suffering and then there's delight. You can't grasp after it, you can't insist on it, just put one foot in front of the other and just sit.

[25:48]

Just pay attention to the precepts. Just pay attention. and it's there, this joy of practice. When I wake up on Saturday mornings, I have a clock radio, and it's tuned to KPFA, and on Saturday mornings, there's the ... I don't know what it's called. Anyway, it's ... Yes, it's Powell, Emmett Powell's Gospel Hour, two hours or something. Anyway, so I often wake up to this joyous Gospel music. And this morning I did, and I just thought, that's it, that's the joy of practice, that's their joy of practice, and we have ours. Which can include gospel, it's one of the nice things about Zen, I can include gospel singing. So we would be well advised to ask what the story is saying about ourselves.

[26:50]

Do I own my jewel? Do I include my jewel? Do I see it? Do I understand that I have one? Do I understand that I am one, maybe? Do you see that? Do you allow yourself to see it? No grabbing, but you could see it. I hope so. Are there any questions or discussion or anything? One, two. Yes? sows the fuel in the man's foot. And it doesn't bother to mention that he's done that. So the man goes and wanders for many years unknowing. And then the friend berates him for not knowing the fuel was there. It seems a little crass on the part of the friend.

[27:52]

It does. And so what? So that's my question. So what? I'm just saying, you know, the point is that you've got a jewel, and you don't know it, and you need to find out. And it doesn't matter about the particular story. It's a parable. You know, Mel sometimes says, don't get caught by the words. But surely, if that's the whole thing, that's important to him. Maybe he should have been more mindful of his clothing. I mean, if you had the Hope diamond sewed in your clothes, you'd probably notice it. Anyway, it just furthers the story. If you want to, please worry about it. But I just think that it's not the point. And the point is, you have a jewel. He's not here. If he were here, you could say, you know, that was kind of harsh.

[28:54]

I agree with you that it was, but I'm just not that concerned about it. You know, in these old stories, there's a lot of stuff. There's a lot of stuff in the Lotus Sutra that's very offensive, misogyny and so on. Yeah. Oh, no, wait. There was somebody. You're three. You're next. Go ahead. So at one point in the reading, you talk about the highest aspiration. And my question is, often, with nothing to attain, what's the highest aspiration? Well, that's the koan of Buddhism, or Mahayana, or Zen, isn't it? a great effort for what? Your job is just to make the effort. A bodhisattva's job is to make great effort and let go of the result, as we say in 12-step. Make your best effort and let go of the result. But there is something still inspiring and challenging about having that notion of being a bodhisattva, saving all beings.

[29:58]

But what we do is we just keep paying attention and trying to respond skillfully and appropriately to what presents itself. And not worry about this othersome, particularly. And you know, there's a story, maybe you've seen a statue of Avalokiteshvara, the Bodhisattva of Great Compassion. She's got 11 heads on top of her, and the story is, that she went down to hell and she saved every single person in hell. And so she's helping the last one out and so she turns to wave goodbye and then she turns back because she wants to see hell empty and enjoy it. She turns back and it's full again and her head explodes. So she has to get another head and she keeps doing that. And it takes until the eleventh time that she finally gets That's just what she does. She saves people in hell, and she can't worry about whether it gets full or not.

[31:06]

So there is this koan, and I think, for me, the way I practice, I don't think about that particularly, about being a Buddha or something. I practice with making a great effort to sit up straight. I practice with making a great effort to let go of discursive thinking. I practice with making a great effort to know where my breath is. Always. Sojin told me years ago that a good Zen student always knows where their breath is, and he was not talking about just in Satsang. Now I fail, and it's my practice. So, that's the koan, and a lot of these older texts, like the the Heart Sutra in 8,000 lines, that sounds like a lot of gaining idea stuff. So you have to practice with that, and not get too caught by it. But let yourself get challenged by the notion of Bodhisattva practice, and let yourself, allow yourself to have this jewel, or to be this jewel.

[32:19]

Think of it as Buddha nature, which we are, rather than have. Do you understand So I have two things, one related to the parable. Because to me, the parable would also be about, and it reminded me of what Sojin does sometimes, of the teacher. The teacher gives you the teaching. They give you the jewel. And then you flail around being self-centered. And you flail around with habitual stuff all the time. And sometimes you get up for show song. And you're saying, well, why can't I ever do this? Why can't I do that? And so he kind of says, he gets you. He zings you. He says, why don't you listen? He said to me, why don't you listen to me? So there is time when a teacher actually has to do that with you. I mean, that's very much part of our practice is to have a teacher who is going to zing us and be mean.

[33:22]

see me sometimes. And they're not being me. And they care about me. But they're giving it to me. Yeah. Well, I think that's true. I don't know that I would see that here somewhere. Because he didn't try to teach him. Because Buddha had been trying to teach these people for years. And they didn't get it. And he finally, he didn't yell at them. But he said, for God's sake, you're going to be Buddha. What does it take, you guys? And then they say, you've been teaching this for years, and now you finally, duh, you finally have it. But the other thing I was going to say was about this business about this gaining idea and no gaining idea. Because there are vows we make in chants. And we were just recently studying the Ege Kotsu, Kotsuban Monk. And it says, you know, You should say just what that is. It's A. A. Dogen's vow of practice, basically. And we were studying that. And it is about, I vow with all beings from this life to want countless lives, to hear the true dharma, that upon hearing it, no doubt will arise in us, and all we lack in faith, and so forth.

[34:32]

But it also says, before Buddhas were enlightened, they were the same as we. We in the future shall be Buddhas and ancestors. revering Buddha as an ancestor is sort of one Buddha and one ancestor. So it kind of says you're already Buddha, and if you practice like Buddha, you're already Buddha. So there is this thing. You're not actually getting anything, but by revering Buddha or by practicing with the ancestors, your process of doing it, you're joining them somehow. That's right. Well, it seems Azen is expressing enlightenment. It's revealing something that's already there. Practicing as a bodhisattva. Wait, are you pointing at someone? I actually have a question. One, two, OK. Thank you so much for bringing this topic to us. I find it really easy to consider myself a bodhisattva after I first recognize it in others.

[35:35]

There's a bunch over here, and there's some over here. If you recognize that in others, and then you say, hey, I do the same thing, then you can kind of say, I do this as well. I do that a lot with Sojin and other of my teachers here. And I find that a nice way to do it if you're kind of self-conscious about calling yourself a Bodhisattva or thinking of yourself that way. One of the things I always like about the Zen style of teaching is that it actually avoids future promises. So I want to issue a warning, like if I had a hammer, I'd issue a warning, you know, that you will be a Buddha is a sort of a dangerous statement. And, you know, so that's, and I was going to tell you guys another Indian version of naturally from Kabir, those who know me know that I'm always talking about this poet Kabir.

[36:37]

So one singer is singing verses of Kabir and it says that there was a guy who had a bunch of jewels and I mean this is a real singer that I know, there's a guy had a bunch of jewels and he just kept squandering them and wasting them and then he got down to his last jewel and And he took a look at it, and he realized it was his last jewel, and he just burst into tears and started hitting himself on the head. And then the singer finished the song, and he said, the jewels are your breaths. Your breaths. Breath is B-R-E-A-T-H. And of course you're right. I do not have a list. And of course you're right. Of course you're right. Don't get caught by being a Buddha.

[37:38]

But I think it's useful for us to have this kind of encouragement sometimes, and also the challenge. The challenge of, like Uchiyama says, you should have a direction, but not a goal. You shouldn't grasp after someone. But the challenge is to see yourself as a marvelous, shining bodhisattva. Own your strengths, for example. You know, it's very easy in 12 steps. The fourth step is making a fearless, moral inventory. And people make pages and pages about their faults. And they go to their sponsor and they say, here, I've done it. And their sponsor looks at it and says, where are your strengths? And they're shocked. And then they go away and they come up with, like, two. It's very hard for us. And Buddha, when you know it, Buddha often will, in the sutras, Buddha will say, I'm liberated. I'm perfect.

[38:40]

I'm great. Sometimes it sounds a little much. But there's a way in which I think it's useful for us to be encouraged to see ourselves clearly, including our wonderfulness. So these are the cons. This is what to struggle with, especially in these older texts. Yeah? I just wanted to mention that probably the most annoying phrase I've ever heard whose discourse is, you could say, a Bodhisattva practice. How come? Or how so? I don't know. Whatever. Please explain. It looks like something that would appear on the front of a magazine. Like, 10 ways to improve your Bodhisattva practice. You know? Actually, it does appear on magazines regularly. And, you know, it's like, what about, you know, it also kind of

[39:43]

you know, says, OK, well, this religion has this practice, and I guess other people have that practice. And yet, you know, the Diamond Sutra just like cuts away all this stuff. Oh, but the Diamond Sutra says, take one stanza and illuminate it and practice it and teach it to others, and then you will gain immeasurable, inconceivable, even to Buddhas, merit. What? The great goal of the Diamond Sutra is to revere this text. And yet, the text itself is about not revering And it's about, I've just been, because I almost got the Diamond Sutra this time, so I've been looking at it again. Anyway, it also talks about revering it. So that's the koan. And I'm sorry that it's become, you know, it does become a catchphrase. And you know, Zen is a catchphrase. In Benicia there's a Zen spa. I went in the other day, I couldn't resist. I said, what's that? They had no idea. It just sounded relaxing. So they thought, that's nice.

[40:46]

And there's a bar that I want to go to on Grand Avenue. The Buddha Bar. Yes. It's got a neon sign out in front with a martini glass. And it's called Buddha. What I really want is to have somebody take a picture of me in full robes in front of it. It's such and so much trouble to go over there on full ropes. What? Did you ever see Jon Stewart? At the end of every show, he said, and here's your moment. Yes, exactly. So, you know, we're trendy. I'm sorry. Maybe that's a good place to stop. It's already after 11.

[41:21]

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