I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words. Thank you for inviting me. I don't know, is it on? Oh, no. Well, it may be recording, but the... Something's not on. The power's on, but is the mute thing... Oh, where is that?

[01:04]

This doesn't have that. That sounded like something happened. Did anything happen? I could, of course, just project. I don't know. The green light is on. It says power on. The low battery... How is that? That's a little loud. I think it's a little echoey. Or, how's that? It felt like it might start screeching at any moment. So, good morning again. I want to talk about spring.

[02:06]

It's a rainy day, I woke up in the middle of the night and it was really raining and I woke up and then slowly it kind of seeped into my consciousness that it was raining and it was delightful because we need the rain so much and it's so life-giving. It felt like it was raining on my heart, just sweet, very sweet. And this is a sweet time of year. I want to talk about a koan about spring. And about the other side of spring. The tough side or the difficult side. But I first, I just, you know, bowing and offering a flower and seeing Marvin Mercer's name and seeing Susan Marvin's father's name on the altar and yesterday Alan and Andrea and I were at a cremation ceremony for Marvin and remembering back that another priest Adelio died not so long ago we were at a cremation ceremony for Adelio

[03:29]

And I guess in some sense that's one way of thinking of the other side of spring, the ephemeralness of spring, and in a way that's the beauty of it. I know it's kind of achingly beautiful because flowers fall, flowers fade. It's the beauty of cherry blossoms. Norman once said that in a lecture just at the time when my parents were dying and he said something quite poetic about the loveliness of the cherry blossoms in your awareness of the death of the cherry blossoms and it's so beautiful and I'm sitting there thinking, give me a break. My parents are dying, you know, I don't think it's cute at all, you know, it's not beautiful. It hurts," and I told him afterwards. I should apologize to him.

[04:37]

I mean, it was my very particular experience. It was quite a lovely lecture and it's true. It's true. Part of the beauty of spring is the ephemeralness of it, the fleetingness of it. Already a lot of trees have been in bloom and now they're in leaf. There's a cherry tree right near my house. I saw it this morning. It's actually been quite wonderful bloom, but our apricot and nectarine and those trees, they're done. So, change happens. And of course I'm also conscious of all the deaths in the world right now. There's Darfur, Burma, Tibet, Iraq, Palestine, Israel, you name it, Oakland.

[05:50]

So we have to include this in our spring. And that's what I want to talk about, this koan within this koan or the koan that it points, in my life, that it points to. There is this loveliness and this sense of renewal and delight. At the same time there's death and dying and pain and how do I hold both of those and what is it about this strange, ephemeral, strong, tough practice that is useful? How does it point to Sazen? So this case is case four of the Book of Serenity. It's a collection of koans that's usually associated with our school of Zen with Soto Zen. Case four is The World Honored One Points to the Ground.

[06:57]

I'm just going to read the case and the verse. The case. Does everybody know what a koan is? A koan is like a teaching story meant to Addressing your heart, not your mind so much, not your linear mind at any rate, maybe your right brain. They're called cases because they're public cases, supposed to be like precedents. This is somebody waking up, maybe this will be a precedent for you and help you wake up. You could lean on this, rely on this, refer to it. At any rate, the case says, as the World Honored One was walking with the congregation, she pointed to the ground with her finger and said, this spot is good to build a sanctuary. Indra, emperor of the gods, took a blade of grass, stuck it in the ground and said, the sanctuary is built.

[08:05]

The World Honored One smiled. I'll say it again. The World Honored One is Buddha, just in case. And so the World Honored One was walking with the congregation and he said, he pointed to the ground with his finger and said, this spot is good to build a sanctuary. Indra, empress of the gods, took a blade of grass, stuck it in the ground and said, the sanctuary is built. and the World Iron One smiled. The sanctuary is built one blade of grass." This is the verse. The verse is like the commentators, the compiler's comment on the case itself.

[09:09]

These koan collections were compiled and then the compiler gets to comment and refer and then people comment on the comments it goes on, but at any rate this is Diantong's comment. The boundless spring on the hundred plants, picking up what comes to hand, he uses it knowingly. The 16-foot-tall golden body, a collection of virtuous qualities, casually leads him by the hand into the red dust. Able to be master in the dusts, from outside creation, a guest shows up. Everywhere, life is sufficient in its way, no matter if one is as clever as others. I'm going to pick this up, I can't see well enough. The boundless spring on the hundred plants. Oh wait, I want to back up.

[10:12]

The 16-foot tall golden body, that's another reference to the Buddha. The Buddha has 32 marks or 32 characteristics and two of the characteristics of a Buddha are tallness and beautiful golden skin. So the boundless spring on the hundred plants, picking up what comes to hand, she uses it knowingly. The 16-foot tall golden body, a collection of virtuous qualities, casually leads her by the hand into the red dust. Able to be mistress in the dusts, from outside creation, a guest shows up. everywhere life is sufficient in its way, no matter if one is not as clever as others. So, I want to go back to this blade of grass, this sanctuary, this sacred place.

[11:23]

What is a sanctuary? Is a sacred place a safe place? Right? You think of a safe place as, I don't know, tough, kind of, and it's got solid walls. It's going to protect you. But this sanctuary is just a blade of grass, tender, certainly impermanent, Right? Especially after you pick it, it's going to wilt in an hour maybe. It's fragile. And yet it is a sanctuary. And I see that's like, that's our practice. That's spring. Our zazen protects us.

[12:29]

Our Zazen helps us let go of all of our ego-bound ideas. Our Zazen helps us to stand up in the middle of violence and say, no, not in my name, no. And yet, what is Zazen but just sitting with your breath? Sojin Roshi says that when you sit Sazen, he ought to be able to come and wiggle your arm and just your arm should move. It should be a relaxed, soft posture. Upright, yes, but soft. It shouldn't be rigid. It shouldn't be that your whole body moves if he comes and wiggles your elbow. That's an image that is like a blade of grass that can bend. That's our zazen.

[13:33]

When it is rigid, of course, it doesn't work. And I think a rigid sanctuary doesn't work either. It will crumble or crack when there's stress. So this spring-like, soft, sweet blade of grass, this soft, sweet zazen, is stronger than that, stronger than concrete. You know, the usual image is bamboo bends with the wind. But we have a blade of grass here, so I'm going to talk about a blade of grass. and this blade of grass could be planted anywhere. This spot is a good place to build a sanctuary. Sanctuary's built.

[14:37]

That's it. What would it be like if we saw sanctuaries like this everywhere? If we just took millions of blades of grass and planted them? just as they're planting trees in Africa. What if we just took our practice and planted it gently, sweetly, everywhere, and let those millions of grasses grow? and we just relied on them, just leaned on all those blades of grass, because of course the koan is of course you can't really lean on a blade of grass, but that's our life and our practice.

[15:42]

There's nothing really to lean on. And that's why grass is such a wonderful image, because if you lean on a blade of grass, you're just going to fall over. So you have to find a way to be a blade of grass yourself, to be upright. That's our practice. And spring can help us remember that, this wonderful upwelling of energy and greenness and flowers. and just smiling. I find myself feeling very sad as I talk to you. I'm not sure why. I think it's the consciousness of this other side of spring and the consciousness of all the trouble in our world.

[16:47]

and I have to include that, that's part of my practice, to be accepting of it. Just as the Buddha's accepting of this sanctuary, Indra's accepting of the invitation, builds a sanctuary, Buddha smiles. I have to accept my sadness in the world and then I can find the joy and the flowers and the grasses. then I can remember and take sustenance from the boundless spring on the hundred plants. Boundless spring on the hundred plants. A hundred plants is everything. We sometimes say 108. Boundless spring. Boundless practice.

[17:51]

Boundless azan, boundless breath. boundless seasons, the boundless spring on the hundred plants. Let's not forget, with the pain in the world, with the Olympic torch coming, let's not forget there is a boundless spring, there is spring surrounding us. There is rain, there was rain last night. It's been sprinkling this morning here. Picking up what comes to hand, she uses it knowingly. She just picks up the grass and builds a sanctuary, takes the next breath and exhales completely. washes the dishes, uses the bathroom, gets involved in elections, or not.

[19:04]

I feel so strongly that everybody should be able to practice here, including people who are for the death penalty, for example. So it's not like you have to have some particular idea or some particular political bent. It's easy for us sort of liberal Northern California and Berkeley people to forget. So whatever. Picking up what comes to hand, he uses it knowingly. Knowing that it's ephemeral, knowing that it doesn't have any self, knowing impermanence deeply, deeply, and then that frees us, knowing impermanence deeply, knowing the ephemeral nature of this blade and brass that's our body and our life and our practice and our world, knowing that, then we can use it. Then we can be useful to others, right?

[20:08]

If we can remember, remember, I think, I don't know if this is the word, remember ephemeralness, remember impermanence. Picking up what comes to hand, he uses it knowingly. The 16 foot tall golden body, a collection of virtuous qualities. That's a great definition, description of a Buddha, right? A body and qualities. There's no self there. There's no person there. There's a body and qualities. Virtuous qualities. And all of us are bodies and qualities. I'm not quite prepared to say we're all virtuous qualities or only virtuous qualities. That's a definition of a Buddha. But we certainly are a collection of qualities.

[21:09]

So this 16-foot-tall golden body, a collection of qualities, casually leads her by the hand into the red dust. So Buddha takes us by the hand and leads us into the world, into this red world, the red dust, the daily world of our lives. Red is a color I think of more as a summer color perhaps. But red is the color of flowers. And it's the color of blood, of liveliness. It's also the color of bloodshed. Red dust. It's the world as it is. Buddha leads us into the world as it is. Right now the world is springtime. Buddha casually leads him by the hand into the red dust, casually.

[22:21]

This isn't a special event. This happens every day, moment after moment, if we can allow it. Can we let Buddha lead us? Can we let our practice lead us, can we let our breath lead us into the red dust? Able to be master in the dusts. Master in the dusts. Again, now that's a strong image, right? Like sanctuary master. But again, for us, for our practice, what is it to be a master? It's to be gentle, isn't it? It's to be in touch with the breath, isn't it? It's to remember impermanence, isn't it? It's to be aware of being simply a collection of qualities, isn't it?

[23:23]

It's not to be General Atreus. and I just use that name because he's the general in Iraq right now. It's not about being the king or the boss, except in the sense of being the boss of yourself, being in control of yourself. Able to be master in the dust, able to not be pulled around by ego and so on in the dust. able to be upright in the dust. From outside creation, from outside controlling, from outside making and doing and insisting and being led around by that sense of urgency that I've heard Alan speak of, from outside creation a guest shows up.

[24:32]

When we stop trying to make things happen then this springtime practice can show up. Then the blade of grass can arise. Then we can see the sanctuary in the blade of grass. everywhere life is sufficient in its way. I think these last two lines are like a little encouragement to us in our real lives. We're just trying to kind of get through the day and not harm and find some quiet in our zazen and be kind to other people. It's just something really simple. everywhere life is sufficient in its way, no matter if one is not as clever as others. We just take care of our own lives.

[25:35]

Let the spring be the spring. No matter if one is not as clever as others, not comparing, not trying to be the outstanding one Just being another person in the world, doing the best you can. I'm reminded of a wonderful line in a song, some of you must know who it is, but I can't remember, a woman sings it. What if God was one of us, just a stranger on the bus trying to make his way home? You know, just being another person on the bus, that's enough. and then the spring can arise and the appropriate response to all these difficulties in the world can arise and we can hear the birds. Let's not forget them as we go about our lives.

[26:43]

Thank you. Do you have any comments, questions, springtime images? I'm sorry? Yes, and allergies, yes. Ephedrine and allergies, that's right, that's right. another thing to accept. The lovely acacia comes in bloom and we all suffer. So, Jen, excuse me, did you have something that you would like to say? Yeah, well we certainly can't, don't deny that, you know, and I think for those of us who are politically active and

[28:06]

in those ways concerned about Burma, Tibet, Darfur, Iraq. It's really important that we keep this springtime with us, that we keep that empty-heartedness, that allowingness, that sweet aliveness with us so that we don't perpetuate the exact kind of harm that we're concerned about. And remembering always that, you know, this too will pass. We just, we do, we respond as we respond. You respond as you do, I respond as I respond. But I don't do it with, I try not to, I fail all the time. But my effort, my intention is to do it with remembering impermanence and remembering that Mara exists and that I'm not going to make evil go away in the world.

[29:27]

It doesn't mean that I give up, it doesn't mean that I don't even go to demonstrations or give money or whatever. But for me, it feels like it's really important to remember that I'm just a collection of qualities. Does that...? Well, that's helpful, and I'm also thinking so much about the activism at the degree that they're coming out of this. Well, I think that's normal. You know Diagonaloo, he's interested, this is a man who's a wonderful teacher at Green Gulch, he's a disciple of the Sojan Roshis and Norman Fishers, and he's also interested in astrology, deeply interested in

[30:43]

different kinds of people, and one thing he said was that there are people who are sad in the springtime, and they tend to be more happy in the fall, where a lot of people are the other way. So I think it's partly just our consciousness, and if you're sad, you know that you have to be sad, and let your body be sad, and then you can also see the beauty, or maybe the more you see the beauty, the more you feel the sadness. It's worth it, isn't it? I think so. Well, I'm with you. When he said that, when he lectured, I remembered it because I felt, oh my. Yes. Yes. that's right that's right what is it in

[31:47]

Four Methods of Guidance, I think even in aversion weeds spread and in desire flowers fall. It's in the Ganges Congo. You think? I don't know. Anyway, it's a wonderful line. I know the other one is from the Four Methods is leave the birds to the seasons and the flowers to the winds. Same idea. And, you know, the collection of qualities of sadness and happiness, it's all a sangha and a congregation, and it's so nice to be here experiencing your talk and spring with everybody in the room.

[33:33]

And I just wanted to say thank you. Yeah, well, thank you. That's a wonderful image and it made me think about that's the sanctuary too, that we are the sanctuary. We need each other in practice together and we can lean on each other. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah. Yes, but just hold on for a second. What time are we supposed to end this part? 11, 10. So we can go on a little bit longer? Yes. I also wanted to say thank you.

[34:38]

When you talked about the Red Vest, I thought I'm a visitor for that very red thing. Thank you. Welcome. It's good to have it, I'm sure, at least a respite. Well, perhaps that does raise a question, which is, or at least to ask you to reflect on this. All of us get as much experience as some of us. But living in the red dust and Of course I have loads of Republican friends. Loads of very, in some cases quite famous, and they know who I am. Well, I think it's a wonderful insight, because I've lived in Ketchikan, Alaska, which is a pretty conservative place, and I was a lawyer, and I was the first woman lawyer that the men lawyers there had ever seen.

[36:01]

This was in the early 70s, and we all used to have coffee together. I worked for Legal Aid, and our boss thought we should go to this morning coffee so that they would see we weren't fire-breathing commie dragons. And they were not so nice to me. They didn't know that they were being mean, but they were mean. And then at some point during that year, one of the guys, he basically had a nervous breakdown, and he was drinking, and you name it. all the lawyers in town got together and raised money and sent him off to rehab and then they sent him and his wife off to a month in Hawaii and they took all of his cases and parceled them out and continued everything they possibly could and handled what needed to be handled and just took care of everything. And that made a deep impression on me that these very conservative small town people were tremendously generous.

[37:07]

And there was something else that you said. The people knew who you were. I don't know, just that sense that we need to remember one another's humanity and that you find these friends to be accepting of you and it's easy for us to forget. When I left the legal department of the Farm Workers Union and we all sort of scattered and people, a lot of us were from here and we just came home, kind of, but not everybody and there was a couple who were lawyer, paralegal and a legal secretary and they were debating where they would settle and he was from Los Angeles and she was from Stockton and they were not going to Stockton but they were debating between LA and here and so they came up here and they spent some time and then they went down to Los Angeles and spent some time and they decided to stay in LA and the reason was because they felt like we up here were too rule-bound and it was freer in Los Angeles.

[38:28]

And it's true. They were saying, you know, you have to have your Birkenstocks. This was in 1978. You have to have your Birkenstocks. You have to go to Pete's. You have to wear a work shirt. You have to have, you know, there are all these rules. And you go into a restaurant and it's all homogeneous. You know, they're all the same kind of type of people. And in Los Angeles, it's much freer. And in 89, for various reasons, I spent a lot of time in LA and was at various restaurants and things, and I thought, boy, they are really right. It was true. There was just so much more diversity of just who was around and a range of clothing and whatever. It was very interesting to me that we, and I say this to you, we in this navy blue area, are very rule-bound, but we just don't know it, because we share so much.

[39:32]

You know, like, you don't go to Starbucks, for example, you know. So, thank you. It's really good for us to remember, you know, oh, right, we don't have all the answers. Well, you have a lot of company. If you look out there, you'll see a lot of Birkenstocks in there. It just helps our practice. Thank you. Yeah. I thought there was one more hand up, maybe. Yes. I'm laughing because I know a lot about it. or Guantanamo.

[41:08]

by not denying it. I mean, one of my many mottos is that trying doesn't work. So, you know, I thought when I went off to Tassajara for four years that I would come back and I would be able to be politically active without being angry or self-righteous, you know? Well, no. But I do know it more, I know it much better now. and I'm not led around by it nearly so much and it probably is not quite so intense. I don't believe in it nearly as much anymore and I see it when I do it, you know, when I impose it on somebody else I tend to see it and I can apologize without it becoming defining of me. So I think if we deny our anger or if we try to not have anger I don't think it works. It's getting to be intimate with it. and also not having any expectations.

[42:34]

What did Suzuki Roshi say? Life is like setting out into the ocean in a boat knowing it's going to sink, something like that? Yeah, that's how it is, you know, so you're going to fail. We're going to fail, but we do what we do and we do it as wholeheartedly as we can do it. Mayeno asked me years ago, she said, well, do you think we're ever really going to change the world? I don't think so. Which, I mean, I'm sad about that, but I don't think so. You know that image of Avalokiteshvara with 11 heads, you ever seen a statue like that? Because Avalokiteshvara kept going down to the hell realm to save all beings and she'd save them all and they'd all be leaving and she made the mistake, it turned around, she was ushering the last one out. hell was full again and her head exploded and she just keeps doing that.

[43:36]

And then finally, I guess, on the tenth try she got it. That's just what she does. Avalokiteshvara goes down to hell and saves all beings there. It doesn't end. Some particular movement might, it can have some success, whatever that is, but it's not like Mara's going away. This should be the last one. I don't exactly trust my own watch, so I think it's almost 10 after, is that right? Yes. My daughter was born in the spring of my life. And I knew joy and happiness and love that I had never known before.

[44:37]

And then I became very aware of great suffering and crimes that were being committed against children. And so I was obsessed Sounds good to me. Just take that blade of grass. Yeah.

[46:00]

And the other player's chest, and the player's got one hand on his head very gently and one hand on his arm. And it's just this total redemption. It's a wonderful reminder of the possibilities. Spring is sprung. I think that's a good place to end.

[47:16]

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