I had the choice of whether to speak in a Zendo or a community. And in a Zendo, we had all the time to dress up. And we knew it and we knew it. We knew it and we knew it. We knew it and we [...] knew it and Um, I would talk a little bit, um, to some extent, um, about, um, danger, about, you know, what has happened, and, um, um, maybe why, and, um, you know, I think at least it would have been, and it was an opportunity to have a discussion. Well, when we did my talk last Saturday, the birthday, that occasion was .

[01:12]

. [...] you know, being more of a person. It's hard to work, you know, being trained in a way to go to this country. And, you know, everything. I said it's amazing. And the government will not keep going to see it. to not pay attention. This is what most people are saying is self-having. So I don't want to, you know, kick ourselves to the pants.

[02:13]

We've already been kicked in the pants. But I think we need to look at this whole thing in an objective way, without partiality, and simply look at what What caused what? In the Buddhist, we studied the law of common. The law of common gave some attention to the old school and the old school and the old school and the old school. Congratulations. Congratulations. It seems to be anything.

[11:54]

The world is totally different. So we have a team of a synchronized or looking force is that it's so incredibly wealthy that the split between . And so it feels just really greater and greater and greater.

[12:56]

And so government, what can I see is It's not because the country is like their world, it's like their body, their own body. When the body is not getting its share, entropy is more difficult. So you have this thick world because the circulation is so bad. And so we live in the school with the wealth. Some people said, well, you know, I have to learn how to do more food and less, which is a normal idea.

[14:02]

and cut down on consumption. That's one side. The other side is we have to do what we're doing. We [...] have to do what we're doing. Thank you.

[15:04]

I think it's difficult to be in real life. And I'm doing it in such a place where you live and you live and you live and you live. It's not a place where you live and you live. It's not a place where you live. Thank you. And you can do it with the same name.

[16:18]

You can do it with the same name. You can do it with the same name. You can do it with the same name. But you can do it with the same name. You [...] can do it with the Thank you. Thank you.

[17:42]

Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you.

[21:03]

Well, and what's happening? Because when you're sitting in the office, you know, going to go out, you know, you're doing anything to do. You're doing anything to do. ... [...] We have four people in the kitchen, and they start to do the experience in the kitchen.

[22:44]

You know, see, I think that a lot of it's already happened. There was a little bit of a community where they said, yeah. But a lot of that's all that happened. So I don't know what's going on now. But I think it still happened to me. We did. Last Saturday we had a normal place. And then it gave us thought. It was a different time.

[23:46]

We've been waiting for ourselves, but... We haven't done anything. Well, we have, but we were waiting about some ongoing service or digital work. Tell us, you know, rallying and... What have you done? And then on Sunday, we turned over the program to this event, and that's what the talk was about. And we had service right after we talked, and this was, you know, again, . And then posting.

[24:47]

Something else happens. I think it's good to communicate and not just people isolated in themselves. What's the means of transformation?

[25:53]

I mean, that's really the main thing. How do we look at, you know, everybody has to change, right? The whole world has to change. We live here in this black place, so we have to recognize how we change. So that's what we really have to think. What kind of change are we definitely in order to influence the world? Because we're the biggest influence in the world. How do we do that? I mean, it brings the world to the others. I think that's the biggest. And if we discuss, I'll do it. And just discuss whatever is the way we do that, you know. Here you go. You know, I could so make me proud. I mean, there's three biggest things.

[27:01]

Ten of years. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. And all of them. What's going on? You know, and that's under Clinton and under Clinton. So it's not usually just like, we met Clinton and Clinton. All the kids are like 10, we wouldn't be able to argue. We want to feel it. I mean, it feels like it's bad. You know, there's something at the beginning. So, when you feel, you will feel it, without the meaning of it. When you feel, you will feel it without the meaning of it.

[28:06]

When you feel, you will feel it without the meaning of it. When you feel, you will feel it without the meaning. Thank you. I can't

[31:49]

So, what's happening? I can sort of move behind me, between the lawns, you know, get inside the table. There's been a few, you know, George Bush that's been waiting on one, you know, about getting together alive and getting hidden. He's stepping back, you know, trying to

[33:00]

So that's really a good step. I think it's sincere. And for the other reason, that's a good step. Listen to how these people are going, you know, at the same time in the world. It means it. You know, it's a reason for the moment. I'm going to join us here. I'm going to join us here. I'm going to join us here. We're [...] going to join us here. Thank you.

[34:09]

Thank you. We don't find it completely. That's the strategy. We've been doing it. [...] Thank you.

[35:28]

In Seattle, for example, there's something to do, and they're not showing up. You can see the love and pain and calmness, and quiet little manas, and you know, so there goes a little bit, and so on. But how are you a little bit? You see, you can put it in a little bit, but it's a little bit of [...] a little bit. You know, people sold themselves.

[36:36]

They grabbed it up their presents and sold them to some of their ship. And I think it wasn't exactly like you could, you know, come here easily and somebody brings your clothes and somebody took the riches to the pyres and got made to that. And, you know, at first... Did you see the crystal, the world, [...] the world. I don't know if that's when you're playing with people. So, when you take the kids, you want to be able [...] Thank you.

[37:56]

Oh, yeah. In a second. I'm trying to address this. I remember still, I remember still with me. [...] I remember still with Yeah.

[39:12]

Yeah. Yeah. There was a time when we could have arrived in the room. And that was usually in a row of time.

[40:16]

And that was the time we could have been really done. So it's something interesting. It could have always been done. We could accept them. We could really do it. [...] is trying to be forming services in 15 countries, closer to 15. But my group is here. At that time, if you challenge many of the laws, it's just a new challenge.

[41:17]

That's true. And it's not the challenge, but it's just something else. You see, they work. And the exam is it. You know, You shouldn't take the time to stop me.

[42:20]

And that's what we need to do. So we're trying to do what we need. We've got everybody working with kids. We've had a good time. [...] It's been a year. It's been a year. It's been a [...] year. It's been a year. How do we do this?

[43:39]

We are now pretty much on the same thing. And we have a chance to do this. . [...] Thank you.

[44:55]

Thank you. I can't say, you know, it's good.

[46:49]

Well, Oh, my God. Okay.

[48:07]

Well, you know, social action, social engagement, is the rising thing in religion. You know? And Jensenhood has two monastic communities, and three of them in the city. Kansahar is totally isolated, and Green Gauch is semi-isolated. The city center is right in the middle of the city. So, most of the Buddhist practices, practice places. But most of the other Buddhist practices have a different mode of operation.

[49:24]

And so people from those communities can be more socially engaged, because they don't necessarily have a kind of scheduling So it's hard for many aspects to do. when there was a lot of nuclear .

[50:47]

So, And I said, well, let's talk to him. And I said, he's willing to have a dialogue with people, but there should be no judgment. You know, you can't judge and say, you know, and try to criticize the people quickly. It would be that you have someone who has someone to come and have a dialogue.

[51:53]

So that you begin to have dialogue. Wow. Yeah. I'm curious about where they don't do any explicit social engagement.

[53:00]

Do you have any insight on what their idea of bringing about World Peace is? Well, I think everyone wants to do that. They all want to do that. They all want to bring about World Peace. Is there any question about that? And also, you know, sitting Zazen brings about world peace. How? I guess that's the question. Yeah, how? Well, as Dogen says, the, um, So, you know, when you sit zazen, we have to understand that we do not sit zazen for ourselves. When we first come to practice, we have some idea about that, but we don't know what it is. And we always come to get something, usually.

[54:06]

99% of times, we come to practice to get something. When you take it to kids, you do it. When you don't have to do it. When you practice, you [...] do it. All the people have been influenced by this practice. That's a big influence in the world. People know about Bend Center all over the world. And I, you know, when people all the time say, I used to practice and I went through Bend Center and I went, you know, and I am so glad that you people are doing this. Because just the fact that we are doing this gives credibility

[55:11]

to this radically peaceful practice, or this radically peaceful way of possibility in the world. So I think the most important thing to do is Zazhen. Our practice needs no more justification than what we do, from my point of view. But it also... I don't think... We can be isolated from the world, from other people. You should be aware, unless you don't care. You don't care what comes and hits you, it's okay. But then there are other people being here, so we don't do social action to ourselves. And also, one of the problems with social action is that you're reverently used to take sides.

[56:18]

So, you have to be very careful in social action about taking sides. How do you do that? How do you think social action is about taking sides? In Vietnam, I'm taking a hound and just show words. trying to bring everybody together without taking sides. We both sides hate you. Toast them out. So it's very difficult. But still, you know, you support those things that you know, that you feel. Your conscience feels right about God and faith. And, you know, to take social action and include the other side, whichever side you're on. That's the hardest practice.

[57:23]

Is there another practice? It's our practice. To include the side that you don't like. To include the pain. I don't even know what people live is actually the answer. There's a chapel there, where something is going. You can hear the chapel there. And you can hear it. So there's so many things. There's so many things. I think that's a great possibility for a monastic community to do something.

[58:39]

Make some kind of activity like that. We could say that Zazen is our prayer. Because if you look at what is prayer, it's not supplication. It's simply connected, being one with nature, true nature. That's prayer. Prayer, one unites with the deity.

[59:41]

But we don't have a deity. So we express the nature. We actually don't need to do that. But we can say at the beginning of Sashin, we dedicate the Sashin to world peace. That's a good idea. And you can do it every time. I was starting to have a moment of sound. I actually wanted to ask something else. I don't know if it's... I'm saying that... I wouldn't say I'm surprised, but stunned.

[60:55]

Yeah, same. And, uh, I'm, uh, I feel, I'm just constantly pain. And, uh, and the more I hear and the more I try to keep in touch, the worse I feel. And then, when I was, like, on my own suffering pre-bombing, it's still, it's, like, even worse now. And, um, I just, I wonder, um, I'm not sure what my question, I guess, is that there's this feeling and thought coming out of, like, how I didn't think it was worse than I thought. And, um, I don't want to do it anymore. Well, you know, a human being, you know, includes all kinds of things. aspect is the pain, that faithful part.

[61:58]

And this is the test of our practice. You know, it's really the test of our practice to be able to bear the unbearable. That's what we learned. How to bear what happened. And then sometimes it will be totally unbearable, and sometimes it will become even But whatever it is right now, you simply realize that this is what we have to do. So this is the refinement aspect of the practice. This kind of says that we need to see it through. So you can't ignore it and you can't push it away.

[63:13]

I mean you can't grab onto it and you can't push it away. Don't grab onto it. It's easy to get caught by it. If there is, a conclusion or a progress. I mean, this is the bird fangs. That's a big one.

[64:14]

This might seem a little off track, but I'm just really curious about what you mean by progress or a conclusion. Well, progress or conclusion, it would be world peace. I had an odd reaction. I felt no anger. I felt enough sadness. I felt enough curiosity. It always seems to be images of a dream or something. Like I'm just not able to feel anything. I'm tired. Well, you know, it's like when the baby falls, there's this moment of silence. So, then my fear.

[65:25]

So I think it's about time, huh? Unless you have some more. Yes? I really would like to ask Eleanor something. I'm seemingly related to what Eleanor was talking about. Yeah. And it's like a sense of like, if I were me completely to you, I'd be trying to do it yesterday, and I felt so incapacitated. I couldn't deal with anything. I go to do my work very well, and some people that were inside of me, and have conversations with people. And I wonder how to deal with that. I feel like it's like, I go from fear to, I don't know, being harsh with people around me, and then being like, no, I don't want to do that. I think one way to deal, there are several ways to deal with it. One way to deal with it is just open your heart and be compassionate and friendly with everyone. That's one way.

[66:28]

Because that could take care of a lot of the fear. When you open your heart to everyone and then you feel supported by everyone, then it's not as easy to be fearful. And I think it's important to compartmentalize. This part of me feels the tragedy. This part of me just needs to take care of things. And this part of me feels sympathy for people. And it's all one person. But if you let your feelings overwhelm you, you can't do anything. And it's not helpful to you or anybody else. You have to feel it, and you also have to be able to put it to bed.

[67:33]

Put it to rest and go about your business and then pick it up from time to time so that you don't forget. That's another way. But I can't tell you exactly how to do that. When I first heard about it, I was totally enraged. reaction was just go in there and wipe them out. I have to say that was my reaction, but I knew that was just an emotional reaction and that I wasn't going to hang on to that. But that, you know, expression of rage came up and I allowed it to come up, but then I just kind of stepped back and let it go and I no longer have that feeling at all. It's more, you know, like looking at clearly. So, the more you can look at it clearly, the more able you are to take care of yourself.

[68:41]

That's what I think. You know, if you are too overwhelmed by something, you can't help anybody, you become a case yourself. And then people actually hear you. So you have to be able to have some fortitude. I guess I'm having an alarming reaction. Like it's a reaction of alarm for a person. What else? In that I've also felt, I've also experienced this kind of bottoming out emotion, and not just emotion, but it's an emotion that leads to inquiry and questioning and a deep voice that connects me with the world and the suffering of others. And I find that it's because of compartmentalization that I have to go to such extent, like so far out, so far down, in order to counterbalance the apathy that has kind of paralyzed my heart and the natural reaction to respond to the world and to save it the way I can to act.

[69:56]

So I find after I go to this place, which it will just come up, and I didn't even have any idea it was there before any of this happened. And I really don't know why, except that it's like the earth, and that it's needed at this time to come with some people. But I find that when that happens, that afterwards I do everything I can to distract myself. It's like, to some degree, it's okay, because I feel like to trust it. and to let it arise when it needs to, and that it will keep occurring until some changes have taken place. But at the same time, this kind of, like, this idea of you just have to be sturdy, and you have to not be overwhelmed, these ideas, I think, like, this kind of be a soldier, like, this has really, um, this is what has created and fed these extremes. that keep us in fear of being ineffectual, or this fear of being like we can't function, which keeps us away from feeling it to begin with, which is what we need to feel in order to respond.

[71:14]

I like what you said in the beginning, that your feeling drives something very deep and helps you to find your way to deal with it. Yes. Yeah, I thought that was, I liked that one. When I, you know, it depends on each person who they are, what they will, how they will take care of it. So some people will do it one way and some another. I wonder how many people in this room, if they would be willing to admit if they've experienced a similar thing? Do you feel like you are adequately equipped to deal with that or to like somehow to allow it to come into your life and respond to it so that there's a more control?

[72:19]

like more of yourself is operating during the days, like that you're able to go into your life? Or do you feel like there's some way that can be called into your life and played out more? Well, for me, I'm walking around numb a lot and sad a lot. And I've exactly twice this week, I think. It's like my mind says, you need to go to the Zendo. You should stop doing all this stuff. And exactly twice I've managed to get the Zendo at an unscheduled time, which says to me that it's like, I'm still, you know, it's like I'm not connected yet. But having made it a couple of times, I'll make it some more times. When you were saying that at first, my thought was, in terms of compartmentalizing many problems, like, if human beings could actually allow themselves to feel what it would feel like, like, if even just, like, physically wounded human beings, you could actually, if we somehow could feel that, then, yeah, there wouldn't be this kind of violence, right?

[73:36]

It just would not occur. I was thinking the first morning it happened, I wouldn't turn to somebody, I wouldn't turn to a person and swear at them. So, like, how would you, Killed thousands of people. If you could actually consider what it would do. But I think we've done historically, karmically and historically, a lot of shutting down for survival. I know when this happened, my first question to myself was, what do I do to make this happen?" And so that's the question I keep asking myself. Like when you started and you said, you know, we need to figure out how to take care of this. I can't remember what you said, but what process would you suggest is what I wanted to ask, but obviously this is part of the process.

[74:44]

For me, it is a question of—you know, I might not swear at anybody in this endo, but I sure will try to enforce my opinion about how my thirty-two-year-old daughter should live her life, even though I wouldn't tell you how to live yours. You know, I see the corners where—I mean, I don't see them, but I try to. I mean, but those were the answers that came up for me when I asked it the first time. the argument I just had with my daughter and how much I was flinging to my opinion about what was right. And so it wasn't hard to extrapolate that to bombing into a building. I mean, if I could hurt my daughter's feelings, I sure as hell could bomb a building, why didn't you worry about it again? I mean, it didn't feel that far away. So, I don't know. I wanted to say something about compartmentalizing. you're feeling like being overwhelmed will somehow be helpful as far as giving a new thrust to action so you can be overwhelmed by something and let it sweep over you and give you a new sense of direction but and

[76:11]

At the same time, it's not all that you are. Your physical body is still digesting your food and your eyes are bringing in information. It is already compartmentalized because there's another compartment that's digesting your food. Compartmentalization doesn't mean to cut off or pretend that some part of your experience, which might be overwhelming. You don't have to pretend that you're going to do this, but experience it fully and then see how can I integrate that into my digestion and what I read in the paper and what I'm seeing on the TV. Each thing has its place in each a lot of different responses. You can't respond to your digestion in the same way or respond to being fully for me, compartmentalization is responding to each thing fully in the way that we may see each other.

[77:25]

Yes. I just wanted to add just to the right thing about the first thing about what I see or [...] what I see. give up or let go, and it's like, oh, it's fine, I don't know, I believe you can. It's like, um, it's overwhelming, yeah, to me. I'm sorry, you know, trying to give me a lot of sleep sometimes. Just, just be overwhelmed. I wanted to just offer a little perspective from the outside. I'm not a Buddhist, but I'm staying at the guest house. I live in Berkeley. And I've been watching and listening to the discussion with a great deal of interest. And, you know, as you talk about setting zazen and spreading peace, I can offer a perspective from the outside, and that is that the world, the world out there is

[78:37]

It's really gotten so crazy these days with so much hate and talk of war that the ripples of feelings of peace coming from the Zen center are all the more important. And I felt that so strongly today when I scheduled time to come here, do some writing, and just entering down, I felt for the first time in a week that I could breathe and said, ah, there is a place where people are making peace and spreading peace and I am so grateful for it. Thank you very much. It's really good to have that kind of feedback. I wanted to offer something about peace. You talked about peace as a place to go to or a resting place. And I wonder whether that's really realistic.

[79:43]

Peace, you know, is something that you are. It's not sitting down doing nothing. One aspect of peace is sitting down. The other side is wherever you go, whatever activity you engage in, that's your mode. So you're hopefully influencing people with interaction, whatever you do. So it's not like it's something you turn on and off. Thank you very much.

[80:50]

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