Okay, so now let's see if I can do that in 20 seconds. We're going to speak in this class about the three doors of liberation, a traditional teaching, which is those three doors are emptiness, signlessness, and wishlessness or aimlessness. And in this first class, I want to talk about what our idea of liberation itself is. And in the subsequent classes, I think each class will focus on one of these three doors. And, you know, I want to leave time for discussion, question and answer, and also, at least today, do some small group exploration of what liberation is. means to you.

[01:01]

So it's worth also asking, why are we studying this? And aside from the fact that it's interesting and intriguing to me, how is it relevant? How do I think it's relevant to you or to all of us in our practice? As I said, in the earliest articulation of these three doors, each of these were seen as practices or as absorptions, meditational absorptions or samadhi. As you know, samadhi or concentration is the fifth of the six paramitas and prajna is the sixth of the paramitas.

[02:23]

But in earlier times, they were, samadhi was seen as a kind of instrumentality. It was seen as the technique by which you gained or came to arrive that project. And so, you have in the the early Buddhist traditions, you have all of these different meditations, all of these different concentrations that are very specific. If you look at a book like Buddha Gosa's, The Path of Purification, the Visuddhimaga, it's like a phone book. It's an encyclopedic compendium of all these different meditations.

[03:32]

And each one of them opens a certain realm of awareness and consciousness. This is a very Indian way of looking at things. It's extremely detailed. and precise and analytic, which, of course, is somewhat different than what we encounter when we look at Buddhism as it moved to China and then Japan. They had some of these approaches, of course, but it's a broader approach. a broader view at the area of concentration. So by the time you get to the sixth ancestor, the sixth ancestor said, in this Dharma door of ours, Samadhi and Prajna,

[04:49]

are considered to be the root. Great assembly do not be confused. The words samadhi and prajna are different, but samadhi and prajna are one substance and are not two. Samadhi is the substance of prajna. Prajna is the function of samadhi. So immediately at the time of prajna, Samadhi is in Praja. Immediately at the time of Samadhi, Prajna is in Samadhi. So these are really inseparable. And the metaphor that was used often, which is one that Sochan was quite partial to, more so because the Platform Sutra of the Sixth Ancestor was really one of his favorite books, real touchstone for him.

[05:54]

The metaphor that's being used is the lamp and its flame or light. So the lamp is Samadhi. And then the flame is Vraja. You can't have the flame without the lamp and the lamp unlit is not a lamp. It's just a thing. So these things go together. And I think that that's part of what's interesting in the development of these three doors. It's actually, let me go to the The term in Sanskrit for these practices that we're looking at is vimoksha mukha.

[07:06]

Vimoksha is the word that is used broadly to designate enlightenment, liberation, awakening. It has the implication or the other meanings in a non-spiritual context of opening or loosening, setting free or sending forth, releasing. So, vimoksha is one part of this word, and mukha literally means, it's translated as door or gateway. In a more literal context, it means mouth or face.

[08:12]

So, it's also by implication means opening or outlet. So it's, you could also describe this, the moksha mukha as the face of liberation or the mouth of liberation. And I think as the meaning evolves, we'll talk more about this when we talk about the the individual aspects of it, as the meaning evolves in the course of the development of Buddhist schools and Buddhist perspectives, we see that this door of liberation is a swinging door. It's not like, you know, my first thought was, oh, the door of liberation, like,

[09:18]

This is the way into liberation. And I think that that's actually in line with the original meaning in the Pali version of the term. But what we come to is that a door can open in or it can open out. And so We also can look at, as we come to our Zen understanding, that you could look at these three doors of liberation as the path, the path to liberation. But as we, understand the path is actually also the goal.

[10:28]

One way to think about this is we often would describe the goal as ascending the mountain, coming to the peak of the mountain. But the way we really experience and come to know the mountain is actually by ascending and following the path. That, you know, we're not generally a mountain climber is not... deposited by helicopter on the top of the mountain. That's kind of not plain fair. It doesn't mean anything. So by actually climbing the mountain, we really experience the mountain.

[11:33]

We come to know it intimately in our body. And the same thing is true in this context. The same thing is true in the context of Buddhist practice. It's only by actually following the path that we begin to have a comprehension of what our liberation or our freedom actually is. So the reason that I want to study this is to really understand from another angle how we can see our practice and how we can practice and that these three doors or three gateways or three practices are really another set of markers

[12:45]

along the path that help us see where we are and that give us some direction and some guidance. So that's what we're going to look at in the next few weeks. So we're going to look at how do we understand and experience emptiness? How do we understand and experience signlessness? How do we understand and experience and manifest wishlessness or aimlessness? Now, again, to go back to samadhi for a moment, while the traditional schools have many different samadhis, we don't We don't talk about it all that much.

[13:48]

In Dogen, there are a few samadhis that he speaks of, but so we hear about Jijuyuzamai, self-fulfilling samadhi, or we hear of Zamayozamai, the king of samadhis. We hear also of the ocean seal samadhi, but all of these are expressions or manifestations of just zazen, of shikantaza. So Dogen doesn't, he doesn't prescribe these samadhis as particular approaches to meditation. Rather, They are just ways of describing how we might perceive our meditation, which is quite different from what you find, say, in a meditation manual like the Vasudhi Maga, which is really a list of very particular meditations that you would do in certain circumstances, in certain physical settings, in certain...

[15:11]

psychological or spiritual settings, you would invoke or you would use this particular kind of meditation. So for us, our concentration or samadhi is shikantaza. It's what we call just sitting. And we'll talk some of that, even though you know what it's like, we'll still make the mistake of talking some about what that is, what characterizes that. So we have this overlapping of path and goal in the way that we're looking at the three doors of liberation. And that's something that we will also experience. So before I press on, let me just stop and see. If there are any questions that you have so far, you can raise your hand.

[16:18]

I can't see everybody on the screen, but you can raise your digital hand if you have a question or a thought. As most of you know, I like questions. I see a question from Gimpole. I guess just right off the bat, I feel a little bit confused because emptiness and signlessness seem kind of like of a piece with one another, but then wishlessness kind of seems like a personal quality. So what's the deal with that? Well, I'm going to resist answering that question because I want us to be able to look at all of them rather than just trying to do it briefly here.

[17:34]

But I understand. I think that's a really good question. I think that's a reasonable question. And I think this gets back to whether you think of these things as part of the path. In other words, you taking them as separate, taking each of them as practices. bringing up an awareness of emptiness, bringing up an awareness of signlessness, bringing up, say, the physical practice of wishlessness or aimlessness. Those are different dimensions. Or are they the fruits of practice? So, you know, I think we will.

[18:39]

Let's hold that question in abeyance. So that's your sister calling, but I'm not going to answer. And we will get to that. Just hold that one in mind. I'm sure it's it's very. I'm sure other people have that question. Thank you. So, Carol. When we talk about this. swinging door it can you can swing open it can swing uh closed open and out is that sort of talking about um we can step in the practice and be liberated at times and then step out and be separated no no what i mean by that is uh that The way it's framed, I think, is that this is the door to liberation.

[19:46]

Liberation is entered by way of these three doors. What I'm saying in terms of it opening out and maybe the metaphor isn't so accurate is that these are also the doors by which one steps forward in the world from the space of liberation. That when you step from the space of liberation, you are practicing signlessness, emptiness, and wishlessness. And you experience that yourself and perhaps other people can see it. So that's what I mean. It's the way in as a goal. or the way out as an expression. And I'll come back to that because I think it's related to the view that I'm putting forward is related to Dogen's unique thoughts about Zazen and enlightenment.

[21:04]

Okay. Sandeep. Hi, Hosan. I wanted to share when you were talking about the door, what came up for me was an image of a gateway. And then also in Sikhism, the Gurdwara is the doorway to the Guru. So we call our temple the Gurdwara. So whenever you enter into it, you're entering into the gateway of beyond. Mm-hmm. It just entered a place of openness for me. And for me, I'm wondering, is there an actual door or is it just more a gateway, a flowing fluidity? Well, that's an interesting question. It translates. Some of the translations say door and some of the translations, I think the word in Chinese is more akin to gateway. But I think of it like it's like the gate to our temple, right?

[22:09]

Which you can – it goes both ways. I don't think that was necessarily an intentional act, but it's the way our gate works. And so I think the wonderful thing – okay, so the wonderful thing about our gateway here – is that it allows enlightenment to flow in two directions. It allows enlightenment so the people who are coming in to the temple grounds are carrying their enlightened nature onto the grounds for all of us to share. And the people who are walking out are carrying their enlightened practice out into the world.

[23:12]

And the gate is equanimous. The gate accepts both ways, right? So there we have a very concrete expression of this metaphor. That's beautiful. Thank you. That's such an interdependent co-origination, which is a foundation. Yeah, yeah, it is. Good. I have a question. Oh, I'm not sure. Who is that? I'm using my computers. I couldn't find my raised hand. Okay. Hi. So three doors. So the image I have is... Well, three doors in front of you. Well, which one do you go first? Obviously you go to the emptiness. But once you enter that, is there another door that leads to the door second and third? Or how is it constructed? Because so you go into the emptiness door and then you get out to go to the signlessness and you get out to go to the, you know what I mean?

[24:18]

How is that, you know, designed or how does it work? What's that television show where they have the three doors? The Price is Right or one of the game shows? It's one of the game shows, yeah. The Price is Right. Let's Make a Deal. Let's Make a Deal, right. So this is the Buddhist Let's Make a Deal. But the thing is that the same thing is behind all the doors. So they kind of like intertwine. I mean, sort of... Yeah. I mean, it's just... You can walk through... You can walk through any of the doors. Either coming or going. It doesn't have to be in an order, right? Does that have to be in an order? No, the orders are different. Well, we'll talk about that. There's different... There are different orders according to different texts.

[25:21]

But it reminds me of... very unique experience I had at San Quentin. There's a main chapel, and then there's a chapel for some of the other religious groups in the prison. So there's a Muslim chapel, and there's a Jewish chapel. And this is probably... The only place in the world like this, the chapel is the same room. Except when it's a mosque, you go in one door. I went to synagogue, you go in the other door. So, but they share that space. It's really unique. So we share the space of liberation with all beings.

[26:22]

So I just had this, it kind of sort of metaphorically kind of all goes under the umbrella of emptiness in some way. Yeah, yes. And that's, you know, I think if you read or you listen to Sojin's talk. I did, it's really good, actually. Yeah, it's really good. And... Basically, he contextualizes all this in the field of emptiness. And I think that makes sense. But it's broken down, I think, for a reason. There's some very useful dimensions in that. But I want to – so let me move on a bit. Thank you, Arthur. Thank you. Yeah. What I want to look at is – what do we understand or what is meant by liberation?

[27:26]

Because if we have doors to something, we need to have some sense of where it is that we're going or what we're entering. So what we understand broadly is that the Buddha taught about liberation from greed, hatred, and delusion from the three poisons, and thereby liberation from suffering. And also, very clearly, he articulated liberation from the circle of continuous rebirth. There are traditional teachings about how to arrive at that liberation. And that's the context in which we have the Eightfold Path, the factors of enlightenment, various other systems of meditations.

[28:41]

And this is one of them. And we call this liberation or freedom or nirvana. enlightenment, awakening. And of course, in many schools of Buddhism, this is seen as the goal. And probably many of us came to Buddhism, maybe not necessarily with the objective of ending the cycle of rebirth for ourselves, but certainly we wanted to end our suffering. It came to practice because we were suffering and we wanted to do something that was going to ameliorate that.

[29:49]

But in Dogen's teachings, as you all know, we have a different perspective. We have the perspective that enlightenment is already present and that our practice our practice of zazen is actually the expression of our already enlightened nature. And still we have a question. You know, even though we've heard this teaching over and over again, we're both affected by the traditional teachings and also we carry our own suffering with us and we may not fully believe or feel that we can embody that we are already enlightened.

[31:18]

It's hard. It's really hard. Because we see terrible things in the world. We may experience these things in our lives. Our suffering comes up in surprising ways or gradually in kind of the... as we age and we get sick or we lose our abilities. And so there are different perspectives. So I want to, you know, I've been looking at this from, I wanted to do a review of what liberation looks like in some detail. And then I'd like you guys to reflect on what it might look like to you. So, this word nirvana, I see, oh, Heiko, you have your hands up?

[32:31]

Yes, thank you very much. I don't mean to interrupt, but what about the idea that liberation is liberation from the sense of self and ongoing being? Yeah, well, that's one of, we'll get to that. That's, you know, and that's, Versus greed, hatred, and delusion, which seem to be endless. Right. So let's not jump ahead. You can just hold that. And also, that may be your personal perspective. And that's fine. That's what I want to explore. But there certainly is a doctrinal basis for that. In Chan and Japanese Zen, I think, more. Yeah. But looking back at Theravada, nirvana is seen as extinction.

[33:36]

And I read something interesting, which really I found, well, confounding, if you will. Let's see, where is it here? Papers, papers. I was reading a commentary on the three doors from the very prominent Buddhist teacher, Ayya Kema. I think she was a German woman who lived for many years. She had a nunnery in Sri Lanka. And so she says, she's talking about the three doors of liberation. There are three doors to liberation, the signless, the desirelessness, and emptiness.

[34:43]

So she puts them in a different order. If we understand impermanence fully, it is called the signless liberation. If we understand suffering, dukkha, fully, it is a desireless liberation. If we understand no self, anatta, fully, then it is the emptiness liberation, which means we can go through any of those three doors. And to be liberated means never to have to experience an unhappy moment again. Okay, that sounds good. Never to have to experience an unhappy moment again. It also means something else. It also means we are no longer creating karma. A person who has been completely liberated still thinks, still speaks, and still looks to all intents and purposes like anybody else.

[35:44]

But that person has lost the idea I am thinking. I am speaking. I am acting. So that's pretty radical. Never to experience an unhappy moment again. I don't think I've ever met anybody who existed on that plane. And I think it's, you know, so this is, this is, to me, the kind of, a kind of idealization that gives me pause when you look at some of the early Buddhism. It's, early Buddhism is often very binary, that it's, There is no ambiguity in the early suttas, in the Buddhist early teachings.

[36:53]

It's like this, not this. So it's like once you have awakened, once you have entered liberation through those three doors, you will never have a moment of doubt or unhappiness again. Quite honestly, that does not correspond with my experience of the world or of what I've seen from the awakened teachers that I've had an opportunity to encounter. So this is, you know, and this is in the... In the description, in the Theravada suttas, speaking of nirvana, here, a monk is an arhant, one whose taints are destroyed, who has lived the holy life, done what has to be done, laid down the burden, reached his goal, utterly destroyed the fetters of existence, one completely liberated through final...

[38:12]

through final knowledge. And that's, this happens while, this is, this is nirvana while you are still in your body. But it's interesting, in contradiction to what Ayakema said, while you are in your body, five sense faculties remain unimpaired by which one still experiences what is agreeable and disagreeable, still feels pleasure and pain, but it is the destruction of lust, hatred, and delusion that is called the nirvana element with residue. And then nirvana element without residue is what happens at death. So this is This is a view of liberation, a pretty radical view of liberation that it's hard for me to get my mind around, quite honestly.

[39:23]

When you come to Mahayana, there's a non-dual perspective of that doesn't see a distinction between samsara and nirvana. But there still is a freedom from, I think the common element is freedom from greed, hatred, and delusion. Which doesn't mean that one has no feelings, doesn't have, One has ordinary human feelings, but one is not caught by them. And this is what Sojin said in his commentaries. Again and again, in that commentary, he says, you come to a place where you're not caught by anything.

[40:29]

And I think this is our Zen perspective. It's just not to be caught. It's not to... do away with feelings, but not be caught by them. And so that's a different, that's a kind of different perspective of awakening. If we think about Suzuki Roshi, he often talks about the difficulties and problems that we have. He says, you might think you could practice Zazen much better if you had no problem, but actually some problem is necessary. It doesn't have to be a big one. Through the difficulty you have, you can practice Zazen.

[41:32]

This is why Dogen says practice and enlightenment are one. Practice is something you do consciously, you do with effort. Right there is enlightenment. Many Zen masters miss this point. While they were striving to attain perfect Zen, perfect Zazen, or while they were striving to attain enlightenment, they don't see that things that exist are imperfect. That's how everything actually exists in this world. Nothing we see or hear is perfect. But right there in imperfection is perfect reality. Wherever you are, enlightenment is there. If you stand up right where you are, that is enlightenment.

[42:43]

And for Sojin, he also talks, there's a piece I found where he's talking about enlightenment. So I think with these three doors, we imagine ourselves moving from delusion into enlightenment. But Sojourner says, we think that delusion precedes enlightenment. We tend to think in terms of before and after. Delusion is first, and we work hard to get something called enlightenment. It looks like that, but enlightenment is our nature, our true nature that is always with us. When we say get enlightened, it's not that we actually get something. It means to bring forth light, to let go so that the light can shine forth.

[43:44]

You can think of that as open the door and let that light shine out. Also, open the door to ourself and let the light shine in. Either way, you look at it. So he says it's to bring forth light, to let go so that light can shine forth. Enlightenment is an expression of our true nature, but that doesn't mean... we necessarily realize it. So what's before realization? There is obscurity, confusion, dualistic thinking, yours and mine, right and wrong, good and bad. And after enlightenment, there's confusion, right and wrong, good and bad, but it's not the same. We sometimes think that enlightenment means the reconciliation of all dualities.

[44:50]

You and I may be angry with each other before enlightenment. And when we become enlightened, we reconcile anger with serenity. After enlightenment, we may still get angry, but that anger is not the same. You are not attached to that feeling. This is often the way Sojin described experiencing Suzuki Roshi. Suzuki Roshi had a temper. He got angry. But in Sojin's experience, he never held on to that anger. It was anger that occurred in the moment. And it burned up quickly and completely and was gone. Now, that's interesting because that's the way it may have worked for him.

[45:58]

How it worked for those around him, I'm not sure. But if there was trust, then they could see that it was gone and it wasn't personal. I had this experience with Sojin, who was angry with me from time to time, sometimes for good reason. But that anger was not, it didn't impede our relationship. It was something, it was another problem that we could work with. in order for each of us to reinforce our awakened nature. So I want to stop here. I wonder if we... Let's see, what time is it?

[47:04]

We have about a half an hour. I wonder if we could break up into, Joni, can you put us into breakout rooms? Yeah, how many people? Four people in a room. And let's take about, let's take 12 minutes. But I'd like you to just talk, what does liberation look like to you? To you personally? And what might it mean in your life? What does it mean, perhaps maybe looking, what does it mean to understand how does it affect you to hear that we already are enlightened? Is that helpful information? Is that a clear enough question? I can't see.

[48:07]

You can nod or... give me some sign of recognition. So let's break up into rooms and just everybody would have three minutes or so to talk and then just share. You have to take notes. Just people who have something to share afterwards, come back and share. We can look at what enlightenment means to each of us. Hosan, could someone give us a bell at three minutes each time? Yeah, that would be good. Joni, can you do that? A bell after every three minutes? Yeah. That might be tough for me to... Oh, I could probably do that. I don't know if you'll be able to hear it unless I'm... Actually, I'm not sure I can do that. I think you should keep it one time. There's an alternative plan. Each group pick a timekeeper. Yeah, that's better. And then I'll call you back, call everyone back in about 15 minutes.

[49:08]

Okay, good. All right. I just want to make sure that everyone who's here would prefer to not, if anyone wants to be put into a breakout room, just let me know.

[52:05]

Were you talking to me? Just anyone who's in this room, if you want to be put into a breakout room with others, just let me know. Okay. Thank you. I'm going to go on mute for a bit. Thank you. Welcome back.

[67:23]

So we have about 10 or 12 minutes left. Does anybody want to report on any insights or things that occurred to you in the exploration of what liberation means to you? You could just raise your hands. I think Heiko has a question. Okay. I was interested to note, although there was variance, but all three doors were accounted for, it seemed to me. So whether it was liberation from self or emptiness or what's the third door? Aimlessness. You know, we didn't have that.

[68:28]

Right. I think actually, no, we did come to think of it. Not trying to search out the answer. Right. Thank you. Thank you. Stan? I think one thing that came up for me, I think several other people in the group, is that liberation often happens moment by moment. I mean, a little bit of liberation. You know, you can, I mean, we experienced that sometimes sitting zazen, but also other parts of our life. So one person used the term, oh, this is liberating. And we use that kind of term often. And, you know, we could see that as if we recognize those moments as, and focus on them, they are part of what, liberation is with the big L. Yeah, they're also, you know, I think just picking up on what I'm hearing is they're not just liberating, they're liberated, that these are moments when one feels free.

[69:46]

Right, exactly. Which is not necessarily, we're not locked into existing that way, but we see that it's there. which I think is part of the really strong message in Soto Zen is that liberation is actually the ocean that we're swimming in. And it's really important not to get too attached to it. Yeah. Once you start saying, oh, this is liberation. I'm now feeling liberated. wow, the door starts closing or something. Right. And that's the thing. Sometimes if we have a certain kind of experience that feels to us like liberation or freedom, then often we keep looking for it, which is causing a whole other set of problems for ourselves.

[70:57]

Other comments, thoughts? Hello? Yes. In Dzogchen, they have a term called non-meditation. I think it basically is when the life you live has been so saturated by the depth of your zazen. that you meet life moment to moment with openness, non-positionality, timelessness with these three doors. That's really interesting, Jonah. I do not, I mean, what I've read of Dzogchen is there are many affinities with Zazen, but What's interesting, just to quote Dogen in Fukan Zazengi, he said, the Zazen I speak of is not learning meditation.

[72:14]

Or another translation is, the Zazen that I'm speaking of is not a concentration. It's not a samadhi. He says, it's simply the Dharma gate of repose and bliss. It's just resting in the moment. And it's not an activity. So that's the objectless nature of it. And I think we'll come to that when we speak next week about the practice of emptiness. So thank you for that. That's quite resonant. Thank you. Other comments, other experiences, other ways of seeing?

[73:16]

Sandeep? I just wanted to add that I really feel it in my body first when I feel at ease and also when I'm not feeling at ease. And I feel like liberation is only possible when my body first is feeling at ease. And I'm a nurse practitioner, so always bringing it back to the body first. So tuning into the body is really going to be important. And I think people of color obviously have a different lived experience in our society. So I kind of... have situations where I feel it in my body, but maybe my friend who identifies as Caucasian doesn't. And so what I'm trying to get at is it's been a tough hill or a tough mountain to climb. And it's hard to realize that liberation's within this whole time.

[74:20]

Well, yeah. I mean, I think there's an interesting question which we will also take up is, is it within? Is there a within as distinct from something that one might call outside? And I think that's something that we will... that we all look at. Thank you. Joel? Yeah, hi, thanks everyone. After I spoke, a story about Sojin occurred to me which seemed to be, which probably most of you know, which seemed to be summarizing somehow what I was feeling, which is a famous story that You ask him how he is.

[75:23]

He always says, I'm okay. And then someone asked him, well, don't you have horrible days where everything goes wrong? And so I just said, that's okay, too. And that seems to me to kind of epitomize liberation. If it's okay for a day to be full of pleasure and everything going right, and it's okay for a day to be full of... pain and everything going wrong. And either the, both of those were okay. And somehow that seems to me, you know, I don't know. It's like, she was totally there with what was, and what was was okay. And I just thought, I love that story, and I just think because there are a lot of horrible things out there.

[76:27]

And somehow liberation would have to include... I mean, when things are horrible, you'd have to be liberated. Somehow they'd have to still be okay. I don't know. There you are with that. So that, for me, seems a story that helps me understand what maybe liberation is. Well, there's a story in that piece that you got where he's sitting zazen, in the Doksan hut, and at the end of the first period, someone started a construction party over on the other side of the fence. My first reaction was, oh my God, is this going to go on all day?

[77:32]

I mean, it was really loud, everybody shouting and digging with shovels, and it was quite an interesting situation. And I said to myself, well, I'm not going to get up. I'm just going to sit here and see what happens. My first thought was, How do I save myself? Should I get up or not? But no, I just sat there. And it was a little bit annoying. If I didn't like it, it was annoying. If I didn't care whether I liked it or not, it was a lot easier. Not that I liked it, but I was able, instead of trying to escape from it, to go right into it. And this is how we find our freedom. There's no escape. The only escape is to be one with something. This is good practice if you can do it. And not all of us can do it at all times.

[78:35]

And I'm not even sure Sojin could do it at all times. But he had a real, he had a large capacity for doing that, for accepting what was what was difficult and not fighting it. Yeah, and maybe not fighting when he noticed that he wasn't able to do that. Right. That was okay too. Yeah. Yeah. But this, you know, just to remind you, this is very different from... never having to experience an unpleasant thought again. This is a different way of looking at awakening. So is there any, we have time for maybe one more and we have to close.

[79:37]

Anyone else want to share something? I'd like to say something. Enlightenment is easy. Practice is hard. You know, so they're going to say it's very enlightened. And Ozan said, you know, we start from enlightenment and we walk towards or we go towards practice. And to keep that practice day to day, moment to moment, that's the real challenge, at least for me. I think it's important to remember it doesn't matter whether it's hard or it's not. This is, you know, when we look at the thing that I quoted from Dogen, that Zazana is not learning meditation or it's not a concentration.

[80:38]

It's just it's simply the Dharma gate of repose and bliss. And I think that many of us have had the experience. of sitting for many years and, you know, just thinking, okay, when does this repose and bliss arrive? And I can say it did, you know, and that was a moment, was a long moment. And right now my knees are causing me a lot of problems. And so it's not so, it's not so, blissful to try to sit cross-legged but that bliss can come and go in a moment and you know you you very well may find and I think this is something that Sojin talked about quite a bit in his life that there's something easeful about practice there's something easeful about sitting and just

[81:45]

with an open, receptive mind, with those doors open. It's about opening the doors, actually. And so we'll come back to that. One last thing. Is that what Suzuki Roshi meant, to leave the front and door, back of your mind, door open, but allow your thoughts to come in, but don't certain T? Yeah. That's actually the... Another way of describing the method of Shikantaza, that your mind is just widely receptive. And so it lets all those thoughts in, but it lets them flow through. And this is, you know, so again, to go back to a Suzuki Roshi expression and a Sojin expression, don't get caught on anything. Don't get caught by our thoughts.

[82:47]

When we're caught by our thoughts, then we make stories out of them. And once we make stories out of them, as we will see next week and the week after, making a story means attaching a sign to something and mistakenly seeing that it seems to have substance rather than being empty. So just accepting the thoughts is to accept is to really course in emptiness and in signlessness. And also accepting the thoughts. Zazen is aimless and wishless. You know, all we do is we let whatever is going to come arrive and we let it flow through. So that's a good place to end. Let's close with the Bodhisattva vows.

[83:50]

Beings are numberless. I vow to awaken with them. Delusions are inexhaustible. I vow to end them. Dharma gates are boundless. I vow to enter them. Buddha's way is unsurpassable. I vow to become it. So have a good night and have a good morning. And we'll see you all the next couple of days and see you here. Same time, same station next week. Thank you. [...] Good night. Good night. Sleep well. Thank you.

[84:45]

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