Skillful Communications

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Serial: 
BZ-02729
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going
salted carefully car crossed my entire life
that's okay
february twenty ninth
i tried to find something of significance and ah date him to have to read section i gave up
guests who can't a correction in the service for her counters ebay
sort of course for some significance but
the for efficacious it's today
if it has a good day
so
the warning what i'd like to speak about yes
the school for communication
ah
forgetting the i think me
to put some attention ah yes because we are my soul campaign
an your
of incivility
ah
ah i because the last election cycle ah and ten thousand and sixteen more talking at the of that boasts association about making a statement on civility and top
come play a blank check with a have spoken to show it ah but compared town
compared to that election cycle
the mess appears even more off for charts so i want to boat and me to tap into the civility
that exists in our society and
my brother words can injured or harmed
and we do that from the ground up
what i had do it you have for us
our process and communities
and i get to that m
what our nation and
my trial motions
and we're very fortunate because i have
might have this laboratory
they can work on it it's called sanga
bye by
a range of can't chains
both ah
caltrans for border and of ancestors had followed him has a kitchen is phone
other sources are east the west that have
provided as garments about how we communicate with each other
for those particular emphasis given him
got a speech as a form of communication
in a bonus after precepts
that way by chanted for long ceremony and i am i safe time
i love nations and are also
monks and also funerals it's planet over and over again
ah
and it must tell ah miss ten
the precepts
charles are directly
i wanted to speech
and in fact all of them are directed to
my relationship
all the precepts are about how we were in relationship to others and heroin are in relationship to ourselves
at the ones will focus on speech
force much
ah in our broken homes i have resolved not to lie but to communicate the truce
ah the folks at charles
ah i resolved not to dwell on the mistakes of i was out not to dwell on mistakes of others but the code was the from ignorance this is the precept ah that
ah
launch against slander
and encourages respectful speech
ha silence i was out to prove myself and downgrade others
baton ten modesty putting others first
services for to sort of ah
but he presented yourself at the expense of others not putting yourself above others ah but allowing everyone
can't find
there are space to express their own it awake nature
she's also don't have any explicit precepts
ah
and what what to ah
is that are
although it's implied hair
i wish there were
i have a precept
how much as
oh
the process of worsening
of course until applied for speaking came out to be someone listening
the features of the
ah catchings
focuses it turns the attention inward
hey in focuses right on
don't tent
yeah i'm catching now aspects in but ah a precept of most name is about so was what mind
does one was safe
another
and that's i think it's a a critical element captain our hands speaks to this
and ah his five
mindfulness trainings with transience version of the punch sandler and five oh
five precepts which are kind of universal throughout southeast asia
ah he writes this
a war of the suffering caused by unmindful speech
an inability to listen to others
i vowed to culpable arriving speech and ten personally
source combining these two what the joy and happiness to others and a half hours their suffering
knowing that words can create suffering or happiness i vowed to learn to speak truthfully was words that inspire self confidence joy and hope
i am determined not to spread rules that i do not know to much certain and not to criticize and condemn things i watch i am not sure
i will refrain from a ring road second cause division or just while they can cause the family and community to break
i will make all efforts to reconcile and resolve or conflicts however small
that's a dent a very high bar ah but it's important for us to think about this and how it applies to our practice

so i started something just dropping was i know when when there's a kid caterers her
i was involved in amateur radio
ah and how much a world war when fastener band radio cinnamon know about that
ah
and it was really cool because
so you can listen to people
well over the country are all over the world
he was open for a moment to hear
helen if you wanted him to speak with them to
look at burberry lotions you know hundreds and thousands of miles away
but what to do this you i have two things
he'll have to have a transmitter to speak
oh had to have receiver tolson
the tom tom electronic radio devices and sometimes for convenience they were combined into a transceiver
and that's what more
natural of a train safer
an interesting word
so
that all in the realm of speech right
but the kind of salami that we're talking about kinds of relationships and kind of interactions that we have i'm not it to speech
hey it's also something that will really cultivate in here in this zendo can practice ah it's not just
oh to air he tells her body to body
it's ah
abroad sphere of relationship
that includes how we work together
how we together much as much as ten that you know will win
over
on unique individual way
but it was not one common form
ah
how we act together
well those things are manifestations of of our interactions

however
he has worked on
different people
you can say different people from different cultures have various modes of expression formal expression and nonverbal expression
but i don't have to look for a damp for me to see that
everybody
introverts is carrying around our own culture
your vs has our own background our own habits our own brains and thinking about things are ways of doing things ah and
we're trying to find a way to hong and eyes
and are rife
yeah er expression i bought is this stuff

have had to talk about my culture my entire culture
ah it's probably it's not right california has shown can use coast
and ah
i realized a couple of settings or for the last ten years when all sudden i've been thrown back in the
a context was or why my east coast friends
it's like
i'm very comfortable
and the thing said
my you're wrong know californians
about my
mods my mode of expression
he was comfortable taken for granted and accepted their is a now it's that's great that's a front of near but
why don't live in that one place
yeah
sure
for example and as could get into a discussion or or get hit on
ah
want to help each other
i try
and no one takes offense
well that's because you're californian
i'm talking about when i'm glad saddam oh my yes cause false ah i was a verbal jousting him
during paul's that's very comfortable
cause for those people and some say every person
i told him i think i tell that
well which has no just put it
i worked
and yes i came across the i get know quite well
and i gave them a little
and not a
well
hey i was
yeah well that they're taxing but we can find lots of examples how and
does a lot hard and fast examples and just spot a personal generally but what one cannot tell he has the fact that people have different styles and different expressions when i was a powerful and but shook my head i had communication guidelines
and when it was interesting me those guidelines for best pretty much i'll tip that on
carve principles and so everybody was forced to speak fairly commonly
very respectful and careful had a member of bird house from canada
and jet i've thought up now she said this is not my culture
who have my culture is hillside because i think my culture is right has just may have different moods so we'll have to to rise a communication guys are on a bed
that included the fact that people have different modalities of expression
and that part of the of a her hope of respect was being able to include that nice sentencing because i've i
i'm done i do a lot of traveling and i know a lot of traveling you know i have to bad
why on my toes on go search and area two different the different forms of communication or when you go to thailand or you know again forgotten
carbon
hoboken new jersey
it's all about it so we'll have been able to yet have to be able to adjust ah speak according to some rules but when i pay attention to what's going on around you service gets term
what i wanted to share
a broad copies for everybody
ah
i'm not sure making them hand these out
so what a gather here are i was struck by has a few years ago i was catching for child must be meditation center
and i'm a or will have a moments from mortal multicultural interactions and your website
as
hi of attention for years for
hello
sure it was all because
some of the
some sort of obvious answer when i was a couple of water
why fresh to me and extremely yes we have like had my practice for ah for the last five or ten years

purple horizontal for cultural sales have you the first guideline try it on
going to try it on more eyeballs was a terrifying said bot that will not what you prefer more familiar with that will unclog was speaking bottom called what somebody else mods and to fall
at ease
central lat my mom can try these things i ha visto mobile to listen
carefully
to her
what is being said to what's what's more by more rational to us
a try to say how to align ourselves with that
second point as problem for until us ah yes boils prefers practice or focus
i can tell and spoke about your own experience as and responses cannot speak for a whole group cox false assumptions about the experiences of others sometimes call on
i statements right
and
ah
it's very common
masako for while was about have dallas ah
ah spoke my boy for the right way
because i want to court i want to promote when i worked
right frame of reference that validates my point of view
does that make sense what about oil
the when
all for his head
of our way more was on tape
that the
if a ranch-style expressed the royal them
wonderful boobs
the other
yeah
the interesting question ah i think the royal puzzles can throw a person has the community
it was as texas what's more problematic as much as doesn't have got time
well as well
what's been expressed us imperial britain child ah dang the twentieth century in japan where the hippo was the embodiment of oh the whole motion i just them
hey there i don't want to do it ah it's it's our fault i'm trying to generalize and present myself as
they have a marvelous or was may has probably growing up behind me i don't want a better can also have a massage coronet ah
but it's important to recognize the subtle ways in which are language can ply
ah
i don't want example
ah
and it's wrong comfortable familiar to us but you know
well right people want
wow what
but was homeless had predominantly
in at me
well cultural centers or that is ah
the presumption of on reality is ripeness
ah ads he has to know at our gates
the hurdles of people who don't fit that crime can also the right care how long
so
this sunday was very hazardous supporter and all right helps yes i do something to away cause close to the next point
what was the best of the actions
and robustness the impact
tom this was the turn on this is the terminal place the next point is a terminal place in those are just guidelines are these agreements ah and
yes
the understand a different story
the can't can impact
try to understand
huge impact
the line pact or something said by focusing on intent
he also more descriptive than the into the initial interaction because it makes sense you know what i'm talking about
so
it's interesting because i thought a lot of the first of my buddhist education
a lot of what you're saying
ah some of their own kitchens focuses on intention
and it's not that will keep washing appeared can pay cash to my intention
but to recognize that
warren's intention however garland
can have a whole different impact according to high ride me
i saw ourselves and the situation
as as does a photo us ah it has so helpful to
to try to step back
god no
cat
what they have had made been on so on have something i've sad or something i've done
the hunker down
yeah
come on an affirmation of the effect well you know i would definitely cannot enter friction
ah that's true he didn't and that's good if you encounter toward somebody that's a whole different ballgame right
but
he was an accidental injury that of elemental focus on can remember war of
it really helps me to know that
because now i can i can expand more talking
my andrea

what i remember that was our
it's my bias
that's what i that's what by virtual walk on conditioning
proj
ah my eyes were not open to
oh and
yeah know i can think that i'm at all
ah what a lot of acting as bad motivations but i'm not i don't see the her ride complex analysis desktop words term ah so by that attention is separate
step on oh a pet
ah and
ah
what the solution is
push the away for solution that it was all rather
john was out a solution i'm afraid of from your war
on homelessness
those are totally by the traditional definition ah and of course like all these factors it has two levels of interpretation
it has novel
ah much just cause what may say as or boy
reality
ah
a consultation was
boss and i fall from the world
because
bad actions in those phones
a car market of karma
ah
aleppo airport
central london level when the absolute level
the factor
the cards understand
absolutely ever seen
have pride in order to fix self
and so that's located in a boy yeah i get way but the robot calls out
i think that things have yourself when you think a prominent for pleasure a mosque for burnham whether it's intentional or not
so ah

a different story i had no impact
well you'd care to proud
god gave us online or flat if your forward that you're most interested in have gotten so cause a response or reaction
yeah i can ask huh hadn't been my time you
ah and that's difficult thing to do put may need to do it
yeah

curiosity

seriously

why
so what sign a famous and we can tie just as a bottle to follow but we're more national practice when john forbes our motion to ourself
and i come back as some was to pay off whatever distro plants that were or
taken over by by bernie glassman in the first tenant as annoying
ah and
that's goes back to the first a volunteer try it on why knowing mars or whopping certain go and so will have to test it out he'd said to haunt of life yes in contact practices
and experiment
ah from a good verification a good contradiction
in correct yeah course ah yeah you know we're correcting her course
setting up a relationship term to towards are we understand to ourselves but not on his first out of it
time will go out as i want a more time for discussion but i just want to control this was some practice both hand some of those terrorists or

first of
for what
it's a boy it's almost a
ah verbal trope that you can dial ha and sometimes i would say sometimes a personal globe time
ah but or and
so it's okay
no training i most of right there well so is it's so he of but if
is a robot towards a daddy and it's a war with the notes awareness is not healthy
but
a race the first step
yeah
yeah but i said
but
it was ah
refrain from global machine himself or others here was a practice the to school for feedback
ha

i think time goes on says are disturbed points problem in china
ah yes yes one point a gun store for fullback and santos us president of bodybuilding shaming as the expression of getting our scope for feedback
i suspect that that's what that that's what that means
ah move up move back
encouraged for participation from bylaw present can order before speaking course not if you tend to speak often consider moving back and vice versa
the console for some of us to says very hard
and i'm one of them ah been working on this for there's one of the woman has the exercise
montana international network of engage broadest meaning in thailand my dad
what rbi
dispatch
i have an open discussion
what's going on and somebody was the note taker and diebold oh hush
all the speaking all the interactions
that and
it was ah
he wrote all the restaurants on a grow into halls
that was a great person
you know how to ah how to restrain yourself how work was for words how i work with motion since it came off you
and
to working i saw those agencies have asked for me ah
talk about the presentation of self
about well to be same you don't wanna be seen as articulate will be seen as smarter going to get my more across
and
dang lot about
the whole
dang not about building a communal sense morning
but you know if any group or class
people just that's the nature
on to say
developed any
techniques that draws a hours
i try
was try and in out senator sometimes what
i like what my bag
why more of years he has to speak to about personal privately have the right public speaking as a he has a very difficult time for a lot of people ah
and more cats you can arrest of damian profits may will also provide them with encouragement privately and tell mom and all interested in what you have to say
when you have to say contributes to the community
you can
like
the struggle
arbitrarily say let's go around supply well when first starting everybody else's
and it could be like if you're discussing topics odors when you have to say
but your post put it all interaction with your gun if you go back to work well i disagree with say i arrived like this but well they're okay well they're doing this thing
the one person i mean that couldn't be on the spot what you say they're nervous or something it couldn't be that they have something to stay and they just didn't have the personality interject cell
himself oh well as of fact i might start writing this a it's it's kind of
artificial going to play your
you're breaking the discussion sometimes of whiskey
that's a form that's what a full had to cancel practice which is sort of coming out of but i wouldn't say it's also an artificial world so effortless as
this is a robot toy entire practice that entire practice yes my current forms today thanks oh okay sauce or an official
it's more once on my phone entered it's wrong it's illogical and gloss or long to dine but in the same time with cancel if i say has a form we're going around but also the last point the hostess the right path
yes
how you don't have to speak but was being compelled to speak but if your souls and formal said people are speaking as they going around fan your more coach chance to join in
to that's a very useful that's a useful form that that does acosta kind of question i can change okay

around
reuters question
everyone speaks something else in metal thing as
be
can step forward
heres the account management problems and the report that you're putting back with your partner said
the is less
the paris area
it's just i say
that's all
casual approach
so i want to know the tour here one is products practice smile for wrestling which was one of the places where i started my what this means is that ah myself first and this is one of the miles of of council as well
and so many of us
a book and find ourselves back in our heads more personal loans that may want to say and while we're done at
why i was i
so
this is also a question about ice for one of the boy is for their spontaneity can trust that
if or something i'm proud to say it will come up but tom tom lawson are often put him not to say already have been said by somebody else ah or something that many shapes and perception
a final
point cocaine is confidential hardy ah and will pebbles here yes
has gonna box does the first discussion
but if you're talking to someone outside
if it's if it's actually if it's a lot of to cancel or something intimate adopt so so so so this inscribed used to a particular person and ah also want to follow up with anyone regarding something they said
ask them first efforts or plan to have a conversation about this will make a available stuff as real sensitive
don't pass up they opened that box and wanted a cause of appelbaum session is over i don't want to talk about it and that's fine we'll have to have to respect that
so the whole lot more than a prefer comply
as a whole making to talk about it next week
this is a book cover how fox hand it's
it's a talmudic ah
all of ah on rules for communication
it's extremely detailed you know about ah but
what the structures are about how talk of fats when their child or fast on how to listen to him ah and that so low complexity in and more approaches
i think it's talk about karma yeah no on yet on josh or at terms but ah ah it's it's relaunch was an infinitely more detail than than our precepts won't go into detail
ah so how was i won't say that going on with that but
i have a one takeover would say i just think about this question of intent any back
think about how it works you are planning how it works on have families in ghana in our nation
ha
it's it's it's a critical distinction that also for that young team or a patient of frog and center tickets and external element so ask your time is almost up have time for a couple of questions and we can talk outside bet
the between when you mentioned intended impact
maybe think of students
ecological systems
an ally that
here's me that you can have a good intent and post office
on the impact site
to observe what's actually have individual results of years
hr i see this a lot
how to have bookshop
cause
a viable source
well they have all as good and charles for
one group or one's passions or one ah have a cat
oh by
perhaps adjusting that
what saw the whole and this is what would i would say that right going to road rule is a lot of is not a fixed kind of it's not a fixed plans ah sometimes a well from yes go abroad
that's it seems more widely and looking at the whole oh
a vast
array of cause and effect and sometimes it's wrong focus on very closely i don't want to in front of him and that depend on the circumstances or what's appropriate yeah
to me
the people that
very and against
political correctness and the reconstructionist
intuitive open
the fifty three
first of all about boss onto it
what
oh you know well what i feel worse i'm hearing it
i'm not sure i'm listening to it because i close my and closed my ears there is a word
country
attractions of this is a he speaks like
here is like
so is we're talking about this is
completed the way
this
oh
well listen to bus best back to come down in a situation as to my god my own time and my own actions and try to world
okay where was values are shared yeah and what type mobile
the oil weekend down had no the may not be
ef
huh
in fact that
i would also encourage us to question whether nine are about our pets
many times these people you know i
observe
keep the noise of my community and we're just kind of repeat them based i love this the way that world works the way the world works is that people are attacking my agent if you really start to ask them questions about what that means and what they believe say something please the difference any thought
and then it's just a wants to be with their community they want the next other people and this is what's being presented in the media as the way to do that so yeah with goes down when those i'm saying it's just really listening asking them what they actually will be spent on the ground
no i ah
where the most popular from you have all kinds of national projects are integral parts of the country or ah the bottle supermarket so
ha ha
turn around
this house more questions about roar customers want the gulf war and we invite
what are the people but hear what they had to say and i can extend that we can do that are always possible ah
well that's something we can do it just it as social if you at any comments today
yeah
no them with your money's worth
but i do want to give an example
that's shortsighted impact
the good intention they need to about it they were used in the cool
oliver will to go through the traffic of been
this is your first street
so i'm ready and good samaritan to the harshly when i go across the street
i'm thinking about all the people behind them back the nothing about the track with your other way
do you get that
that's good intention the
particularly we show and dodging the effort
devastated
this has all
what was told that he told last week
had no stopping for that dog that was running about this side of the road and there was no way a disaster fortunately wasn't but the woman could have been
so much
because we live
contract that we can start to help
we can step on it to attract to help him with yes
michael
you going to like the has no
you have to the wrong
the family
is basically
things happen and neither
that'll fuck fog lamps
the golf
it's really important
and able to hold that
the what's on resolved first as part of a money
a central part of our training is working with a brief working with what will last
yes
working class was our our bodies torn me love
and
photo at n
cut the whole practice this is that's us what we learned by just settle and forcing ourselves
scientists pay for us to return but it is important because there's a lot of pressure that's gonna cost offhand