So, too busy. Busy, you got a racket. You're on a trip here. And Yun Yan, then he immediately though, wakes up and comes forth and says, whether I am or not, you should know, there's never a racket. It's always oneness, right? And Da Wu says, well then there's a second moon. And Yun Yan says, as I sang, I'll never get tired of watching, lifts the broom and says, which moon is this? I think that almost the first talk of Sojins, this thing came up about the body in the body.

[01:18]

I want to read that again. What are the four establishments of mindfulness? Bhikkhus, a practitioner, remains established in the observation of the body in the body, diligent, with clear understanding, mindful, having abandoned every craving and every distaste for this life. He remains established in the observation of the feelings in the feelings, diligent, with clear understanding, mindful, having abandoned every craving and every distaste for this life. He remains established in the observation of the mind in the mind, diligent, with clear understanding, mindful, having abandoned every craving and every distaste for this life. She remains established in the observation of the objects of the mind in the objects of the mind, diligent, with clear understanding, mindful, having abandoned every craving and every distaste for this life.

[02:34]

I hadn't remembered the part about the body, in the body. I remembered that I'd studied the Satipatthana Sutra when I was at Tassajara, but I didn't remember that part. And just this morning I looked back at the one that I'd read, and it wasn't in there. But there were other things about that one that I liked. So I'm going to read you that way with adding in the thing about the body, in the body. She overcomes her desire and regret about the world and dwells, observing the body in the body, ardent, aware, and mindful. She overcomes her desire and regret about the world and dwells, observing the feelings in the feelings, ardent, aware, and mindful. She overcomes her desire and regret about the world and dwells, observing the mind in the mind, Ardent, aware and mindful.

[03:38]

She overcomes her desire and regret about the world and dwells observing thought moments in the thought moments. Ardent, aware and mindful. And another way I was playing with this back in that time was observing events in events. Ardent, aware and mindful. this thing about the body in the body, I might not have even noticed, except that someone asked a question about it. Who was that? Anybody remember? What does that mean, the body in the body? Is that you, Stan? Also Ross's skin. Also your comments during South End yesterday, the spine and the spine are a little different. Right. And that's the cool thing about our religion, guys.

[04:40]

It's all about questions and answers. You ask a question, it's not for you, it's for everybody. You may not get the answer but someone else may wake up on that answer. And, you know, all religions have really amazing cool things about them and this is one of the really amazing cool things about ours. many, many sutras, Hinayana sutras and Mahayana sutras, are about a really good question. Start with a really good question. And then, of course, a really great answer. So, the answer was, it's because you don't set up subject and object. It's the body in the body, that you set up awareness outside of the object and you're observing it from a distance.

[05:46]

So I found that really interesting and helpful and I've been trying to sit with what that means. What is that? And somehow it brings up for me another thing that I never really understood which is the thing about how there's no coming and going. So how can that be? I mean, we're supposed to see that it's impermanent, right? So if it's impermanent, then it's coming and going, right? So how can it be that they say that dharmas don't, there's no coming and going? But somehow when I practice this body in the body I can get, I get the feeling about what this is and somehow this is how it, I've been wondering, well, how does this tie in with the thing about the one who's not busy?

[06:50]

And what I, what I notice is that when you're, hmm, The way it's actually happening, you don't experience the coming and going. You just experience what's happening. The only way to get the coming and going is to have a fixed point of reference and use your memory. to say, oh, I remember it was there and now it's not. Therefore, it went away. So in one point of practice, it's really helpful to notice that things don't stay, that they're impermanent. They come and go. But then we need to settle into that deeper level where we forget about the observer and we're just the body in the body. And then there's no coming and going.

[07:56]

It's just what's happening. And then it's not busy. It's not even busy at all. Not even a little bit busy. And Thich Nhat Hanh has a little more to say to bring this out. The Pali word sati means to stop and to maintain awareness of the object. The Pali word vipassana means to go deeply into that object to observe it.

[09:00]

While we are fully aware of and observing deeply an object the boundary between the subject who observes and the object being observed gradually dissolves and the subject and object become one. This is the essence of meditation. Only when we penetrate an object and become one with it can we understand. It's not enough to stand outside and observe an object That is why the sutra reminds us to be aware of the body in the body the feelings in the feelings the mind in the mind and the objects of mind or the thought moments or the events in the events. Now it kind of seems like this awareness.

[10:02]

So what this is about for me is about how the self exists. So we kind of tend to think if we don't look closely that that's the self, the awareness continues from moment to moment. So when we're practicing We're trying to get our awareness to continue from moment to moment to moment. And it's kind of like a self, we hope. And that way we can control it to stay moment by moment on the object. But actually it's not like that. It's really like with what's happening, the awareness is there with what's happening. A fresh awareness is there moment by moment with the little package. So it's like the eye, the sight, the eye organ, the visual sight, the consciousness, and the awareness is there as part of that.

[11:08]

It's fresh. It's kind of like how there's always a McDonald's wherever you go. So, like, my daughter doesn't ever suggest that we bring French fries with us on a road trip. Because we know there'll always be a McDonald's there. So we never bring fries. And if we did, gross, really. What could be worse than Coldsdale French fries? So you don't need that. You don't need to carry anything from moment to moment. It's going to be there. It's going to be there. Whatever you need, fresh and hot and delicious for just that moment. And then forget it. The next one. And there's also, there's any self you need is there too in that moment.

[12:11]

It comes in that package, whatever self you need. Enough self to keep you from falling, to keep you from starving, keep you from going crazy. It's right there. All you'll ever need, right there. I wanted to read you the the Tassajara version of the end part of the various sections of the Mindfulness Sutra. Thus he dwells, observing events internally. He dwells, observing events externally. He dwells, observing events internally and externally. He dwells, observing events which occur. He dwells, observing events which pass away. And he establishes the mindfulness that this is happening just sufficiently for a bare awareness and a bare mindfulness of it.

[13:14]

And he dwells in freedom and does not cling to anything in this world. So there's just enough in each moment, just enough awareness. Just enough mindfulness, just enough of a self. All you need. You know, the spine has this part that's liquid around each vertebrae, there's a little liquid part. So if you're sitting and you try to have your back in its natural curve. So like, what I like to do is tilt my pelvis, like roll my pubic bone down a little, just a little, just a tiny bit.

[14:20]

That gets the lower back forward a little. And then that's going down, and then from that down, you can kind of, there's an upward movement right there, right by the microphone. You can lift up there and kind of pull your spine. Make a little space between each one so that little juice can roll around there, flow around there. That's the bliss of your backbone in your backbone. So even when your knees are hurting or your hips are hurting there's that bliss of the backbone in the backbone. I was thinking about the way we try to establish the self.

[15:41]

The self is just something we conjure up each moment, by moment. We put it out there by moment because we think we need it. And it's kind of like, it reminded me when I was thinking about this of this scene in one of the Wallace and Gromit movies. I don't know how many people have seen those, but there's this one called The Wrong Trousers. where the, is it a penguin? It's like the giant monster penguin. This giant monster penguin is chasing Wallace and Gromit around the house and they jump on the toy train. And they're riding the toy train around the first floor. And they jump on the toy train to get away from the penguin, and the penguin jumps on the toy train to chase them. And they're riding around the house, zooming around the house incredibly fast. And then I think Gromit sees the dog. Wallace is the guy. It's like this claymation thing. And Wallace is the guy, and Gromit is the dog.

[16:45]

And I think Gromit notices that they're coming to the end of where the track is. And so he grabs the box of tracks and he starts laying them out incredibly fast. You know, just, I mean, you could only do this in animation. It's like, so they're going on the one that he's laid, he's laid it out and they're going on it, laying it out, and they're going, just like that. It's really, it's really great if you get a chance to see it. I recommend it, and that's kind of like the self, I think. It's like we stick it out there, and then we get on it. We think we need it, but we only have to do it that fast because we can't keep it going. We have to do it each time. We're always coming to the end of the track where there isn't any more. So it's like, and then of course, you can't actually do that very much.

[17:51]

It's too tiring. You think you do it all the time, but actually you don't. You don't need it most of the time. Most of the time, you're going along just fine, and then it happens that the thought arises of the needing of the track, or the insecurity, or the out of control, or the feeling of needing the self arises and that conditions the laying out of the track really fast. And then somehow there you are and then the thought can arise, oh, the laying out of the track. And then the thought can arise, what is it? And then the thought can arise of seeing what it is somehow. you sort of, sometimes you can just turn around and see, except there's no you, right? So I told myself I'm gonna try to say this without having the self in there. So there's the thinking, what is this track laying out activity?

[18:59]

And then there's the turning and the seeing what it is, followed by seeing how tiring it would be to try to lay out the track. It's too hard, actually. As soon as you see you don't need to, oops, there I go. As soon as the seeing happens of the not needing to, the arm, the track laying arm poops out. It's like, ah, too hard. So after my second talk about the koan, and now my third, I went to Sojin and I said, okay, I've been a good girl.

[20:02]

I've given two talks. What does it mean? And he, of course, came up with a great image. He said, well, it's like the ancient mirror. the ancient mirror shattered into a thousand pieces. I guess the ancient mirror is the mirror that reflects our true self, our original face, our true nature. So I guess somehow there's this mirror and then it's shattered into a zillion pieces but each piece is still reflecting the truth. Pretty good, huh? So as I was settling with this, trying to settle into this it turned into a jigsaw puzzle immediately, it just suddenly turned into a jigsaw puzzle and I thought, oh we need your peace we need your peace

[21:20]

We need every peace. How do you bring forth your peace? With mindfulness. We can't put it together without everyone's peace somehow. And you've got more than one peace. I mean, you've got a peace every moment. We need your peace every moment. And our peace, our peace is partly our racket. It's our chief feature. It's our insight. It's our pearl. It's all those things. So every moment is a little piece of the mirror piece of the puzzle.

[22:48]

I was thinking that Sashin is also kind of like a wind-up toy. It's like we're sitting there And then the bell rings, and we start in our little service, doing our little chanting, our little bowing, little meal, then we go back. And each time it's different. We wake up, it's different, but it's the same. It's the same, but it's different. We need that differentness. We need to somehow just witness and celebrate that particularness every time. Really completely in there, not as an object, not standing outside, just fully entering this moment. Not killing our peace.

[24:13]

Not ignoring our peace and trying to get someone else's peace. Not using or misusing our peace. Not lying about our peace. Not trying to bring something in to jazz up our peace. Just our peace, what it is, completely. I never seem to get to the moon. I guess that's for the next person. Thank you for listening.

[25:20]

Do you have any questions? I thought it was before you said that was the last thing you said. What about those two moons? Yeah. Well that's one of the things about the ancient mirror is it's like the moon is always, you know, is reflected in a puddle an inch across, that thing of Dogon, so that's why there's myriad moons, but really there aren't two moons, and there's myriad moons. The moon part is just I guess it's just beyond me. Jerry and then Dean. When you talked about the piece, I thought about a children's book called The Missing Piece. It's about a circle with a little quarter piece cut out of it. And this, he can't roll very fast because he's got a piece missing. And so he rolls slowly and he smells the flowers and looks at the birds and the butterflies go in his head.

[26:27]

looks and looks and looks around and keeps looking for his missing piece. And then one day, he tries different pieces on and they don't fit. And then one day he finds a piece that fits just right. And he becomes a circle. But then he rolls around faster and faster and faster and can't stop. And can't stop and see the flowers. And can't stop and have the butterfly in his head. And he can't talk anymore or sing either because his mouth is closed. So he actually takes the piece out and puts it down and then goes on his way looking for his missing piece again. And I was thinking how we are like that. And that it's the looking and the paying attention that he does when he doesn't have the peace in his mouth is actually kind of what... You know, there's this thing that Dogen says where he says, when you're complete, you realize that something's... When it's complete, you realize something is missing.

[27:42]

Maybe that's what it is. It's better with the something missing. It's actually more complete. I was going to ask you about when the ancient mirror cracks into a gazillion pieces, or gazillion, I guess it's gazillion, same or different, pieces, and you said, or you look in the ancient mirror and there you see the whole picture, your exchange with Mary, then each of the gazillion pieces has the whole picture in it. I think you have to have total faith that your piece is reflecting the whole. But you don't try to bring that in. I mean, you just completely do the piece.

[28:45]

The piece, the one piece completely. So you're not trying to sort of like make the one piece into the whole thing somehow. You just, but you have total faith somehow. Do you want to weigh in on this? You have faith that it's reflecting the whole somehow. Sort of like at the same time that it's the whole, it's also part of the whole. Well, they caution you about, they caution you about making, trying to bring the oneness in as a separate thing. It's really just the peace, being in the peace completely, then you see how it's part of the whole. And I guess we'll just go around this way. Greg, Ross, Jake. Thank you for your talk. I liked that business about Wallace and Gromit.

[29:49]

And it made me think about the Fugansazengi So when your truck laying off gets tired, is there some learning or unlearning? Wouldn't that be really good? It should get really tired. Just get it really tired. It's going to poop out. Is that the learning? Yeah. Well, that's one thing. I guess there's also just the seeing that it's not always happening. It's part of the learning, too. It's not actually continuous. A lot of the time, you're going along just fine without any track. It's good to see that part, too. Ross. There's a bumper sticker that says, Jesus is coming.

[30:52]

And we do boy, we do. Sojin's amount of work that he needs to do, but his practice is just laying it down and Well, I think you actually have to choose really strictly.

[32:11]

I think part of the busyness is a dialogue with our world right now. I mean, part of it is you get a lot of requests, right? It's not just that you come up with these things. It's something we're cooking up together a lot right now. So you I think you really have to notice what trumps what, and the sort of unconscious way that things trump each other can be different from what you really intend. We'd want it to be that when we meet, that trumps ourself. In other words, I experience this a lot. I somehow am afraid to meet people, you know?

[33:14]

So it's like myself, my self-clinging is trumping the meeting. That's just a small example of how I think we really do have to choose. And it's really strict. It's a really strict world right now. And I think sometimes even when we choose really well, the requests are too many and that's okay too. I mean, it's okay in a certain way that there's too many sentient beings to save. I mean, you have to settle with that too. You have to settle with that there's too many requests. It's hard. I'm just rambling, but it's hard. Right. Yeah, it's... Since your children are older now, have you noticed in your own way of handling that some facility?

[34:42]

I try to bring that feeling in, yeah. Because it's really good. I think the thing that calls... I think the thing that kids have that calls that forth is that they're depending on you. So I think how are all sentient beings depending, how can we feel how all sentient beings are depending on us? Like you do that, right? You kind of have that feeling, like the teacups are depending on you to take care of them. I mean, you can bring that, like that. I meant the ones in the apartment. Where are we here? Jake. With the ancient mirror broken into an unknown amount of pieces, makes me think of science today and astronomy, you know, with the big reflecting telescopes.

[35:50]

There was a time when they only had one mirror, bigger and bigger. And then someone came up with the idea of breaking them images created from that with a fine-tuning. Wow. So, Dogen lives in... That's great, yeah. They'll get there eventually. Science always gets there. They've proved that love exists now, right? They'll get there, they'll get there. Give them time, patience. Yes, Grace, and then Catherine. Thank you very much for spending this time with your family and serving such a well-balanced meal. But I was wondering about the world of takeout There's always French fries, and for the people who don't have the fries, it's really important that we get them the fries.

[37:08]

I don't know if I can do this, but I want to go back to your koan that you've been working with, and the two guys, and the line in the commentary about the butler overseeing the maid. No, he sees the maid. He sees the maid and takes care. Right. And I think of using that image because butlers do oversee maids. I mean, that's not what it says, but that's what they do. And I think of Sachin and like a Sachin director and what we experience when we come together. There's always somebody who takes responsibility to make sure all the jobs get done. I mean, think of work leader, whatever. And at the same time, The session director, the work leader, is also concerned about the practice of the student.

[38:18]

Not just, is the job getting done, but is the student also, the words that come to me for the two moons are being and doing. And I see the old guy coming up and saying, choo [...] to the guy who's making a racket sweeping. Are you just sweeping or are you also being? Do what I'm just doing, are you being busy or are you also being? Because that's what we try to help each other with. And in that moment, when he re-challenges him, when the sweeper says back, you know, is there a difference? And then the overseer, you know, the older brother says, you know, there are two moons. I mean, there's being and doing. And then holding up the broom, really raises a key question for me. When you read it this time, for the first time I got that. That is the central dilemma of my life.

[39:18]

It's like, which moon is this? When I'm doing, when I'm sweeping, when I'm doing the practical things that need to be done, am I also being? And how do I know which I'm doing and is it one or are there two moons? Well yeah, and he's not sweeping when he's holding it up. I know, but he's challenging and he's stopping to reflect, he's asking. And I realized that's my question. It's like, when I'm in the world, a lot of what you were describing after that, in your talk, seemed to me to be about when I'm meditating, when I'm sitting Zazen. And the question for me always is, if I'm not sitting Zazen, where I'm really focusing body in the body, am I being in the moment, not laying track, but really just in the moment, But you know, I'm not a lot. I do get busy a lot. And I'm not being anymore. I'm doing in time.

[40:21]

I just couldn't believe when we started talking about the moon and the dew drop. I mean, that's where Dogen says, time is being. Being is time. And if you can start seeing those moments as being rather than as a stream of time, can shift that for me. Right, part of it is that it's not stringing it together. You can't string it together unless you have a perspective and if you're holding to a perspective then you have the self. What kind of time do we have here? You don't know. You're beyond. I'm ready to go back to... I'm ready to let this wind-up toy wind down. Who?

[41:22]

Diana? Oh, okay. Diana. No, go ahead. Please. I insist. Uh-huh. No, I didn't. Thank you all very much.

[41:49]

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