In light of this season, I thought it'd be a good time to talk about transformation and change. Even though I'm sitting directly here in front of you, up on a platform, can you possibly imagine for even a moment that we're exactly the same? That our essence shines exactly the same. Not one spark of difference. I'm just sitting here. That's all. That's the only difference. We shine exactly the same. What are each of us doing to meet this jeweled essence that we have inside? What are we doing to nurture it and love it like our best friend, our dearest friend? What can we do to bring life to it and cultivate it so it can become more and more a part of our life?

[01:26]

It's not something that you might have someday if you did things better or different. You already have it. It already includes your entire past. Every wound, every sorrow, every joy, Every giggle. It includes all of us. It includes our life. It's our birthright, our birthright, to have that jeweled essence fill our whole life. And it doesn't mean that after this jeweled essence fills our life that we stop crying, or that we stop having sorrow. That's not awake. that's not real. Instead, you'll cry just the right amount. You'll have the fullness of tears, fullness of joy.

[02:28]

And slowly, slowly, as we awaken this life inside and welcome it into our life, our life begins to open. What really happens is our mind and heart open. Probably when I said open I thought of the Mervyn's commercial all of a sudden. Open, open, open, open. God, isn't it amazing how it penetrates you? But actually it's like that. The saints are all quoted as saying Until their heart was pierced through by a deep sorrow or anguish, they could not realize the way. So actually, how can the sorrows, the pains of our life, be the door opening for our life to have life?

[03:31]

How can we celebrate this life inside? Little things. Brother David Steilbrast is a friend. I feel very grateful. And one time I went to him when I was having a kind of spiritual crisis, meaning big time dust storm on the inside. That's all it means. And I said to him, I don't know what to do. I don't know where to put my foot. In a sense, I mean, I can walk, I'm fine. But, actually, where do I put my foot? And he said, oh, easy. You do gratefulness practice. I said, well, that's six words. I said, now what? You know, what do you mean, gratefulness practice? He says, you start at your feet, and you say, I have, if you have nine toes, fine. If you have 10 toes, fine. You say, I have blank toes. I'm grateful for my toes. There are people in the world that don't have toes.

[04:37]

I'm grateful. I have two ankles, or I have one ankle. I am grateful for my ankles. There are people in the world that don't have ankles." And the man, and he said, after 283 items, you get darn grateful. You forget your misery and the door opens. With each gratefulness, we feel an opening. And it doesn't mean the sorrow isn't there. It just means that we don't get preoccupied by it, and we can still see the springtime. Can you see the beginning of springtime, even in this fall? Now we haven't quite hit winter, but can you actually feel the burst of life underneath the ground? Although above the ground it looks like everything's dropping away. Lots of sorrows. Can you instead feel the life, the vitality that's beneath?

[05:42]

Same with us. We all have our stories. There is no one in this room that doesn't have an anguish or a story. A painful story. But even that's included in the way. So the difference then between us and saints, or Buddha, or Christ, is that they stopped interfering with the jeweled essence, and they let it shine in their life, and they let it shine throughout their whole life, while they're in their life. I have this problem of thinking I have a better way sometimes. Well, I don't know anything but, the big but. but actually there's something within us that knows. Already we need a time to meet this quietness, to meet the mind that knows, the mind that hears through seeing, and smells through hearing, and touches through speech.

[06:55]

It's different, just a little different, but we all already have it. This is from Moon in a Dew Drop. I picked little one-liners. He was talking about someone who's painting, and he was trying to paint spring and paint blossoms and branches. And he says, when you paint spring, do not paint willows, plums, peaches, or apricots. Just paint spring. To paint willows, plums, peaches, or apricots is to paint willows, plums, peaches, or apricots. It's still not painting spring. This spring that we refer to is spring in the painting.

[08:02]

It's within it. It's the life that's in it. Because it enters into the painting. Our very life, our very jeweled essence, enters our life or doesn't enter our life. It's not special activity that's enlightened activity. It's no special activity. It's just activity. It's just fullness. It's allowing the essence, our own jeweled essence, to fill us and move into our activity, be a part of our activity. That's very scary, you know. In Zen, at least for me, I know when I first started Zen practice, I could say from my deep anguish and my deep pain, I needed to go into stillness to find what was truth. But one of the things I had to bump early on was I wasn't worthy of it.

[09:06]

So when we talk about allowing our Essence to fill us, we also have to give ourselves permission to have it. In your heart of hearts, do you believe you're worthy? And if not, because of the stories you have in your mind, maybe let it be just a thought that perhaps you are. Just let it be a thought, and let the springtime rise of its own. There's an old Chinese saying that says, it's Taoist, very old. It says, when changes come with swiftness, they must leave swiftly. When changes come with the turning of the season or with the timing of the season, they last for forever. How can we nurture the springtime inside of each one of us? What do you do to include you into the picture? Most of us are raised thinking about taking care of somebody else, even in a religious life.

[10:17]

We have to be very careful. We start hearing so many requests, and it's everybody's needs, and that's totally appropriate, but we forget there's one more need and request. All of Buddhism gets boiled down to one kind of rule. Even the precepts, all that boils down. I like cooking. When you boil and boil and boil and boil down, you end up with this very rich broth. The rich broth of our life. And it means not to hurt self or other. So that means we get included right into the script. Our joy is included in the script. our love, our needs, our hopes, all woven right into the script, as well as honors. How can we live our life weaving ourselves in? Now I would imagine, I don't know, maybe all of you already are doing this, and I'm way behind you, but when I look back over a given day, I can tell you all the things I did for other people,

[11:29]

I can't chalk up too much this direction. I ate. I washed my face. But the little things that touch me deeply. It is our responsibility to nurture that life within. In a sense we do it alone. But we need the help of others. But we must give that life permission to be inside. And we need to do little things. Little things like whatever you do, everybody has a little inner silent secret list of things they love to do that touches their heart. Now, I'll confess one. I love to feed ducks. That's it. This is not profound activity. Don't ask me why. I must have been a duck in a lifetime. I have complete joy in this. I find that when I do activities that deeply touch me without trying to judge them, that the life within is given permission and it grows.

[12:35]

It's just like a little plant. No matter how old we are, it's never too late. I do a lot of work with people that are dying or quite sick. I can't tell you how many people at 80 or 90 years of age, on a deathbed, are still waiting to be touched deeply inside. I don't know if there's been any greater teaching to my life than to watch this. Because easily, day to day, we slip off the mark. Millions of requests coming in. What about this? What about this? What are the true meanings in our life? The old plum tree is within the human world. and within the heavenly world. The old plum tree manifests both human and heavenly worlds in its trueness.

[13:36]

Therefore, hundreds and thousands of blossoms are called both human and heavenly blossoms. Myriads and billions of blossoms are all Buddha ancestor blossoms. You notice that when we go around trees or nature, how we feel peaceful? It's because the rock isn't trying to be a tree. Rock is completely rock. Pine tree, completely pine tree. Bird and squirrel, completely bird and squirrel. But we somehow, I know I did, keep thinking I'm supposed to be somebody else. But nobody told me who it was yet, so I'm not sure who I'm running after. But the point is, who is this one that's in your feet? Why do you have these hands? What did you come to do this lifetime? Who is this precious jewel?

[14:41]

There has never been anyone like you. And never will. Blessing and a curse, right? Heaven help them. There's only been one. What can you do to meet this life within? It's from doing those silly activities like feeding the duck that we get to meet who we really are. And then we fill our feet. One time when I was sitting Sashin, a little bit is just a warm up to Sashin that's coming up. I sat there, it was about the sixth day, and this thought came bubbling up in my mind, When you die, what would you like to have people say about you? I was absolutely horrified. I was praying, nobody heard it. Although it was in my own mind, I still prayed, nobody heard that. I thought, this has got to be the most selfish thing in the whole world. What do you mean, what do you want me to do when you die? But I usually don't think like that, so I decided to take it on as a koan.

[15:44]

What is it? What do I really want people to say about me? What would I like to really hear? And after sitting with it for a period and crying with it, it bubbled up. She lives in her feet. It didn't mean polite. It didn't mean cute. It didn't mean I had to give up tenny. Nothing. She was alive. This one. Alive. When angry, angry. When peaceful, peaceful. trying best, just that clear activity. A wonderful book that I recommend for teaching in, I call Gentle Warrior, is a book by Trevor Leggett called The Tiger's Cave. An amazing book on talking about true compassion and how it fits in the world. So if you ever want an amazing book, I've read it a million times at least,

[16:47]

We find that actually, when we sit, we touch our aloneness. What connects us is our jeweled essence, because it's exactly the same in you and me. No sparkle difference. How we manifest it in our life is the difference. That's it. But that jeweled essence is our connecting point. But to hear it, we do it alone. I cannot hear for you. I cannot walk for you or cry for you. But I can cry with you and walk with you. Alone and full means nothing is lacking. Beyond two or three, meaning beyond the multiple of one, beyond two and three is called myriad forms. Myriad forms are moonlight, not merely forms.

[18:21]

There's a form, but there's an essence within. Accordingly, its light swallows myriad forms. Myriad forms completely swallow the moonlight. We have to give ourselves permission at some point in our life, at least I hope we all do, to experience the moonlight within all forms. And I'll tell you something, as we start to experience the jeweled essence within, even with those silly ducks, we start to experience it in the others, around us. And then I'll tell, I'll already jump ahead and tell you the end of the book. The last chapter, last line says, and then you'll find that the exact same essence in you is in the cloth, in the book, in the altar. There's nothing without it. Can you believe you have the same nature as a duck?

[19:22]

It's scary. I don't know. Same exact. That's our connecting point. We have to give the moonlight permission to fill our body and mind from here. Not from outside. from within ourselves. It brings a strength to us. It brings the quiet, gentle warrior alive. When I was at Tassajara some years ago, this is a story about teachers now that help us, that become the gentle warrior. I had seen a part of me that was just flooring and shocking and painful. as well as my own history. And I was crying, but I'm one of these silent criers, you can't hear it, but just the waterfall, you know, I'm one of those tough guys, you know. I was sitting in Tassajara crying, and the bell rang, and we had some teachers that came to Tassajara, one of them was, and it was in the days of Baker Roshi, Mizumi Roshi, and all these people were there.

[20:31]

And I got off my cushion and I went, so strong, you know, and I went outside, the bell was there, and I started to cry, but I went behind the trees. My Zumi Roshi had gone for a walk, and he saw me. And he turned and he waited. Usually teachers, they usually don't want you to know too much that they know what they just saw. They're very kind, usually. He on purpose wanted me to know that he saw me, so he kept going. I was like back where the back row is, so quite a distance, you know. So I just felt this. And I turned and I saw him, and he had this gentle smile on his face. I thought that was profound. I felt ashamed. Absolutely ashamed. Because he saw me cry. I don't know where that came from, right? So, we went back to the zendo, and we're eating oreoki meal. And if you don't know that, that's a formal Japanese bowl eating that we do, and it's very formal in how you pick up chopsticks.

[21:32]

And in those days of Tassahara, there's the way you pick up a chopstick. It was really sort of crazy the way we used to do it. I think so. We all held the bowl the same way, and we bowed the same way. It was just very planned, everything, you know? And what you don't do is get, you never drop a utensil. Because if you drop a utensil on the floor, the official way is the head server walks the perimeter to the person, bows, picks it up, walks back to the altar, bows, goes back to the person, gives him a bow. It's quite an ornate thing and you're totally ashamed. At least that was a feeling. My Zumi Roshi was at the farthest most point of the Zendo. And all of a sudden I got this stare at me again, and I thought, you know, I don't know, I just, so I looked up, it was across the room, and he looked at me like, thank God, I've been staring at you for minutes, and he picked up his chopsticks and he threw them on the floor.

[22:33]

I was devastated, because nobody saw this. Nobody looks at the teacher when they eat. I don't know, I don't know if anybody knows what Mel looks like, but anyway, no, usually you don't look at people when they eat, you know. So it was awesome because nobody dropped the chopsticks and he threw both of them on the floor. So anyway, he came and they got at this whole thing and I had my mouth down in the air. I couldn't, I was a wreck. The meal was over, went outside and I went back to the same trees and he ran to find me. I was really uptight then. It can't get worse, God, please. I can't handle it. I'm really tense. And he comes over to me and he says, is there any dishonor in a Zen master dropping his chopsticks? No, sir. Jesus, if you can't drop it, how come I only have a chance? I said, no, sir.

[23:34]

And he said, and there's no dishonor in a young student's tears. And he turned around and walked away. Boy, did I cry. The way makes space for our tears, our anguish, our pain, our sorrow, and it gets all woven in. Just like your body has all your parts, so does your mind get to join the way and be free with all your stuff. You don't have to check it at the door. You don't have a jeweled essence after you throw the other stuff away. you actually get to bring it to it, and it gets bathed by the jeweled essence. And then you get to put it on a shelf that we can refer to, but it doesn't weigh us down like a refrigerator on our spine anymore. Zazen is a great way to meet the jeweled essence, to meet our deepest, innermost heart and request,

[24:43]

to meet our feet from the inside and to get to know them completely and to get to know them without judgment and without fear. And you'll cry and sometimes you'll cry out of seeing how beautiful you are. I remember crying just as hard as seeing my beauty as I did by seeing my pain. I must have lied when I put it this way. In spring wind, peach blossoms begin to come apart.

[25:52]

Doubts do not grow, branches and leaves. We oftentimes think that at critical times in our life, that there's no plum blossom, that spring isn't gonna come, that turmoil is it. But in the middle of this turmoil, by growing quiet, we find that there is spring beneath the ground, in our feet. Something that I've done in my life, and I offer it as a suggestion, is a way that I needed to make peace with turmoil in my past, or I'm 40 and I'm in menopause and last December I found out I couldn't have children. I had very deep shocks. I went and did a ceremony where I went to the mountains and I followed the deer to the top of the hill.

[26:56]

And there was this great clearing and I made a ceremony out of rocks and ferns and all the things I could find. And I offered a stick of incense begin the rest of my life. I recommend that at any time of heavy transition in your life, or if at some point you just want to completely start over. See, that's another beautiful thing that I love about Buddhism, is that every moment we get to start over. we get to be fresh like springtime. Each and every moment. We even have some ceremonies directed at starting over, the monthly Bodhisattva ceremony. But you can also make your own ceremony and begin over. I found it profound.

[28:00]

I found for me as a woman, Up till 40, I had taken special attention to look back at me in my life and heal and heal and heal and make peace and heal and heal and heal. And then at 40, we're at the same doorway of change. Menopause, or sometimes the American Indian way calls us the women of the 14th moon. is that I actually did a ceremony where I said, okay, all that I could have possibly done, I have done. Whatever bubbles up, I will work with. But now, I go forward in my life. Mel said something to me one time, very profound. He has great one-liners. I love his one-liners. I said, I was going back and working on something. This was a couple years ago in my mind, and he said, You can't go back. It's impossible. You can only go forward.

[29:03]

It's very precious. Can you possibly imagine taking the deepest weight from your heart, your deepest secret, and starting over? I recommend it. See, I'm one of these people that I can't just throw it in the air. I'm afraid somebody else will get it. I needed to put it to rest. Not only in my mind and from my body, I needed to know that I took care of it. Because I didn't understand all of why it happened. So these kinds of ceremonies where we start over, we recognize and start over. This is not a good poem. It wasn't meant to be, but it was a description of Zazen and the power of Zazen in my life.

[30:07]

This is like a period of Zazen when we're really taking it on, when I'm really taking it on, not lightweight stuff sometimes. Lightweight's okay, but sometimes I have to go in and roll up the sleeves. The soft valley floor carpeted in wildflowers, sort of like wildflowers of the mind, The sun gently resting upon my shoulders. In the distance, I hear birds singing. Spring is in the air. These moments of yesterday fill my mind as I scale this rock wall before me. It's my own barriers. Barely enough room for my hands and feet, my arms scratched and bleeding. Do you ever feel like you just couldn't do it anymore? I lower my head, tears falling from my eyes, my body strained and tired, and deep in my heart the words emerge, Great Buddhas, please don't forsake me.

[31:13]

My experience in this way is, you will never be forsaken. Never. The more we trust this unshakable we find what we really can rely on. And it's not a thing. It's the moonlight. It's the moonlight that's every one of ours birthright. When we start to awaken this jeweled essence within, Then we start to hear the jeweled essence in the flowers, in others, in the wind, in the trees. I've studied a lot in the American Indian way over the years.

[32:17]

Little bit, little bit, I should say, over the years. In the last maybe year or so, much more. They and Dogon have same deep affinity with nature. This was written after sitting and watching the flowers on an altar. Plum blossoms newly blooming on the altar, one by one turning, pivoting, sharing their dance with life, sharing their life with me. When we start to awaken to the jeweled essence of this small mind, We start to hear, we start to hear and smell and taste and feel the universe different. You will never be the same. Your life will never be closed again.

[33:18]

Slowly, gently, we become like the plum blossoms, turning on the altar, moving with the light, opening and opening and opening. Oh God, there's that commercial again. Amazing. before I began to sit some twenty-something years ago, a little over twenty years ago, before I began to sit, my life was deeply painful. I was like this, broken. Broken person. Broken human being. Horrible wounds. I had every right to die. Every right. The anguish inside, so full.

[34:25]

No no joy almost at all. When I began to sit, the dust began to settle, and I began to see and taste Me. The Me is the Dual Descent. Your Me is your Dual Descent. It has brought strength courage and deep faith into my life, and a desire to be alive. And I cry, and I have sorrow, and I can get angry, end and end and end, I do good work, but I'm alive now. Please take on any practice which brings life to you.

[35:31]

I tell people, even if it's called doorknob, don't worry about it. It's just a word. If it touches your heart, pierces it, to the deepest core of you, beyond the barrier, please do it. You don't have to push to do it, just keep doing it. I keep loving you. Very important. You take care of this jeweled essence. And your life will feel like moonlight. Teaching of the American Indians, a word is metakuyasana. It's all my relations. That's wood, fabric, people, birds, trees, rocks. I think Dogen would have made a great Indian. I think in his own way, indeed. Because he talks about hearing the water, hearing the trees.

[36:32]

He listens. A practice we can do is when anytime you touch something with your hand, may it be a relative, or even try the practice for a few minutes a day, and picking up your grandmother, or your brother, or maybe better, brother, or sister. Different feeling. When we meet whole universe like our brother and sister, we are with the jeweled essence within. No gap. And our hands will get warmer, and our feet will get warmer, and we'll die having lived in our feet and been true to them. I'd love to hear your thoughts, and maybe what you do, because it'll help others, what you do to touch your jeweled essence, no matter how silly.

[37:46]

Dux is pretty good. Yes. I just thought of something when you said backdropping and picking up something. I'm at a stage in my life where I'm constantly mid-processing. And I was thinking of Bill Cosby's story of going to the attic to look through glasses and what was the rise there for his work. And I just thought of whether your comment about picking up your brother, I thought of my losing to notice that I had lost it, like forgetting my breath or something. So I'm very grateful. You're welcome.

[38:47]

And then that tied into Brother David's practice, which is gratefulness practice. Of course, don't say it out loud. Hello, my brother, how are you? You might not live where you live much longer. Do you believe you have a dual essence already inside of you? Do you know it, even if it was only for a moment? You guys look so somber, I want to apologize. Okay, yes? You talked about going for a whole day.

[39:49]

to obscure or climb over any concept or any awareness of a dual essence. Can you see how they're both the exact same thing, just different sides of the same coin? Not better or worse. It's hard to see it. Okay, let me try again. Giving too much, not giving enough, same. Same. Seeing others, not seeing self. Seeing self, not seeing others, same. It's okay. There's not a better problem. There's not a worse problem. It's like, it's okay. You know, one of the things that I've had to come to see about me is that to get to where I am, I did my darndest. From all that I experienced in my life, from making up, trying to understand the turmoil and the anguish, I came up with certain ideas about the world.

[41:20]

And so I did my best shot to get to here. That from our life will either give more or less to the outside world. So it's okay. So now we just work on the other side. It's a blessing you got to where you are. It's okay. So now your practice is just to open up maybe to others. It's okay. Mind's got to go meet. No problem. Yes. I'd just like to say that I really agree with what you're saying about sitting Zazen and helping to find that jewel. Because it seems like I've been running around trying to find it under a great dress all my life, and I can't find it. And it's amazing how just sitting and staring at a wall helps you to find it. And the encouragement

[42:22]

that goes along with it. And I think too, maybe we can take, I want to say, and please take it home with you, this practice. And please take all that you find in this room home with you, and let it grow. Yes, absolutely. Please take it home, enjoy. Thank you for the wonderful talk. And no matter how many times I listen to it, sometimes I don't remember everything you know which is in there and so forth. I'm wondering if you can repeat for me one of the visualization or meditation techniques. I don't know, maybe that's not the perfect one. You shared with us at the Bali Morning Talk last time

[43:26]

something when you feel unfinished or the same. Other people, something you don't... How do you have closure? Yeah. Are we okay on time? About one minute. It'll be a fast one minute or a slow one minute, is that alright? Okay. This has two parts to it, this meditation. I'll just tell you what's worked for me and what I share with other people and then you can do Let it form fit to your feet. Please go home and enjoy your feet today, huh? How do we meet this dual decence within? Suggestion. You find a quiet place so that you can have some clear time. Whether it be 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 20 minutes. Just clear, clear, unobstructed time. And I tell, this is my way, I say let the thoughts from your mind go to the back of your head.

[44:31]

See what happens is, obsessive mind is this, right? You just, you can just see it. We have to take our worries, just put them at the back of the head. Don't worry, you've got them all. You'll have them again in five or ten or twenty minutes. But let it just, put them back. Let it breathe, soft, soft feeling. Breathe from your abdomen. And you'll find, just like babies, little baby's bellies. I have nephews I adore, and they're little boys. They just breathe. That's free. Work with your posture so you're nice and straight, because it helps your breathing. It helps your nervous system. It just makes a gentler journey. Breathe with your abdomen, and be aware of the entire breath. The beginning of the breath, the middle, and the end of the breath. and feel how one breath becomes the next. Now, there are no two breaths the same you've ever had in your whole lifetime.

[45:35]

Each breath is another aspect of the diamond heart that you have. Triple. So meet that breath completely and fully without pushing it away or trying to make it bigger, tougher, longer, wider. So the mind becomes your friend instead of the aggressor. When mind joins breath and nature, you have one piece. You have freedom. You have enlightenment. Who cares what they're learning? You just are. So, mind goes back. Just be aware of the breath. Experience it all different. Now what I like to do is tell people sometimes, if you're out of touch or having a hard time with somebody, re-remind yourself of softness with your breath, and kindness, until you feel that thread in the breath, and gentleness, and then you'll feel that the breath will start to open into your hips, so that you have foundation, strength.

[46:46]

Now, from here, this is pretty good solid grounding technique. If you want to help it move into the heart, it will, you'll just allow the energy to fill your heart. It'll just, sort of like, it's just the warmth comes up all by itself. And again, soft and kind. This is great to do after a shock of some kind, or somebody dying. It's a great thing to do. Peace. Whatever word you trigger in your mind brings a quality of being. When you feel good and solid here, if there's someone in your life that's either you're scared of, having difficulty with, or is in deep hurt, you know, physical difficulty, you see them in your mind, before you. A gentle smile, just gentle. And from your heart, you talk to them completely.

[47:49]

This is not a trash session. But you're allowed to say exactly what you feel. I feel. I. Owning it. Owning. Owning. It's respecting. See, all this is back to one word, respect. We're being with reality. And then you say all that you love about this person. You complete a circle. I'm here for you. I've had difficulty with you. I don't understand. I'm sorry. Can we please hear each other? That's all. Can we hear each other? Or, I hope the wounds in your body will heal. Please know I can be of support for you. You can call on me for anything. I'm here for you. It's incredible for a person when they're dying. You see them smile. And then you see them turn and walk away. Important, that last part, so you don't continue any psychic connection.

[48:56]

Come back to your own breathing. Come back to your own grounding. The difference will happen. I know, I'm way into the minute. One last 30 second story, and I promise, I promise I'll stop. Just to show you how powerful this works long distance. You can do it with people across the United States, across the world. Don't be surprised if you don't get a letter from them out of nowhere saying, I've had you in my mind. You see, why do they hear it? Same, same. When you talk from here, they hear you. One Buddhist teacher said, we're just a bunch of zucchini plants, all connected at the head. I thought that was cute, because I'm Italian, so I like zucchini plants. All right, last, last, last. I lie about this, don't I? I don't speak Italian, so we can... Oh, there's one more story. It was right there. There was a young man I was working with who was dying.

[49:58]

He went into a coma the last day of his, you know, the last hours of his life. His family, in the few days before he died, found out not only was he gay, but that he was dying. What a shock that the family had to go through. Two things. There was no time. It was just like, oh, like this. They were Italian, so I was used to go help, because I had just become of that. I had the same kind of background. So in the room, around Frankie, people were saying, you can die, and inside you're saying, doom doom, because it's unfinished business, right? It makes total sense. So they asked me to go in the room and do my thing. I don't know what that was, but I just, I went to the foot of his bed with my beads, and that meant something to them, you know? And I got very quiet, brought the breath here, and brought the breath here, and then spoke to Frankie. Nothing special, just what you've got is all you need. And I just said, Frankie, he's unconscious, and I said, when it's time to die, I fully support you, I will help you cross.

[51:07]

Now I'd known Frankie before he went unconscious, so we already had connection. Within about a few seconds, Frankie started, sat up straight in bed and scanned the room, and then found me, and went, whoosh, and laid down, and three hours later he died. All I can tell you is, I can't push you into saying how incredibly your life will change when you start to nurture the jeweled essence within. You will feel an inner connectedness not only with you, but all of life. Fears that I used to have in working with the deaf used to be because I didn't feel connected. I have no fear in picking somebody up and holding them in my arms when they die. We just connect. I promise you your life will change. We have a wonderful session coming up.

[52:13]

If there's any opportunity to come join this Sushita, I recommend. And just breathe. You'll receive, no problem. And please take it home. Thank you very much.

[52:34]

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